Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

House (1986) Filmsack Show Notes


Oh hi,
Hey Shovel….while we are stuck here levitating in the upstairs bathroom of the house waiting for someone to open the door…I’ve been doing some serious thinking about how we got ourselves into this situation. I mean, I know I’m just a pair of Shrub Cutters…but to the best of my reasoning…the house has enchanted us with the gift of life. But to what end? I’m a still a little fuzzy on why are we trying to murder Roger? I mean up until this point I have just been following Axe’s lead ….but now I am starting to question things….like why Grass hook is hovering up into my personal space! Back up Grass hook!

Shh…listen…I think someone’s coming! Oh I hope it is one of the nosy neighbors! I would love to bury myself deep into that Harold guy and watch all the booze shoot out like a freshly tapped keg. Oh no! I’ve been gifted with life but all I desire is murder and mayhem! Axe…end my suffering with a swift swing! ….and so help me Grass Hook… by the name of the maker of tools….if you don’t back up…. I’ll will take you with me!

*Gasp* The door is open! Go Go Go…Kill anything that moves! GRASS HOOK GET OUT OF THE WAY! MAN YOU REALLY PUT THE ASS IN GRASS!



House (1986) – Like trying to flee from a suicide scene on a moped. You just can’t get away fast enough. I AM GROCERY BOY!


  • Mrs Hooper…It’s me…The Grocery Boy…I have no name.
  • Sick Picture
  • It’s hard to run from death on a moped
  • Thanks Mr. Jones…”he loved my aunt?”
  • Get out of my face ya freaky book fans
  • Married to Sandy Sinclair…a Marvelous Actress.
  • Blood Dance…the best book 3 years ago.
  • You gonna owe Double day…you already lost your wife over this.
  • Frozen Food….The Horror!
  • 30 minutes for a frozen entree in the box…didn’t even take it out.
  • FBI and the CIA are on the case Mr. Cobb
  • There was no caller id in 1986….how did he know to pretend he was having a rocking Poker game?
  • His ex-wife lost at the awards show
  • Does he not know how phones work? Hello Sandy…Sandy. “I’m such a jerk.”
  • Is his son in the pet cemetery? Sometime dead is better.
  • Mr. Parker…Mr. Cobb…Mr. Jones…Mrs. Hooper
  • US Record for 2 years for fishing. Uncle Hooper Died Diving for Abalone
  • Cobb grew up at the house…his mom died and his aunt raised him.
  • So not only did he grow up there at his aunt’s house he lived there as an adult? or was he just helping his Aunt with some yard work?
  • Jimmy done got took by that car…no! he’s in the pool!
  • Got a nephew named Monty who could do something with this place.
  • How did Uncle die? He was diving…HARPOON!
  • “The House did it Roger…” Aunt Elizabeth
  • Aunt was working on paintings.
  • Dumbass…don’t put your hand in a shark’s mouth.
  • They should call that foray the “hello” room…Hello? anyone there?
  • The house tricked me…this house knows everything about you.
  • is that his Valium?
  • Ha! He is still sleeping in his kid’s bed
  • Love that sweater …beat it dog…That is Harold’s dog
  • Mr. Gordon Horrible old woman…lovely woman…want dinner?
  • Harold keeps a book in his pocket that is essentially a stack of papers?
  • That is one tiny monitor.
  • Solitude…solitude
  • Vietnam on set.
  • These guys are in their 30s…the average age was 19…ni ni ninteen
  • I don’t usually think about grenades being a quiet attack…but I guess they can be used in that capacity.
  • If only…you could turn your kids off with a remote
  • Going crazy…brush my teeth….nope…going back to check that closet.
  • The hour strikes 12….the witching hour! Do…Not…Open…That…Closet….after…midnight.
  • Did this guy just order a bunch of equipment from Amazon of the 80s?
  • Hey Rog…what’cha doing? Solitude? Looks like Larping for military types.
  • It’s only after midnight Roger…lots of cameras and lights and military garb
  • Harold just invites himself in with food.
  • Look at this scratch…does this look like a ghost
  • Harold just gonna call a celebrity?
  • flashbacks
  • Richard Moll has got to keep moving and clucking like a chicken.
  • That fish is alive!
  • Got to go get a gun? now there is flying yard tools…yet he is still worried about shooting the fish?
  • The yard tools are back! They are the chick in the bucket?
  • Sandy…what happened to you! Accidental discharge.
  • Roger has a pink phone?
  • Me? Just sitting on my porch whistling and rubbing my gun.
  • Roger Cobb has a face that is hard to recognize at first…but then…bam.
  • Blood Garden or Blood Dance?
  • Beat it Harold
  • So the tools were just hanging out in the upstairs bathroom. Should have sent the cop up there.
  • Now Roger believes his son is in the house?
  • What are you digging? A hole.
  • Tanya just pops in…man theses neighbors.
  • Man what all did he bury in that backyard?
  • The neighbors dog is a menace.
  • Roger spends a lot of time violently rifling through drawers
  • They should call this movie “Neighborhood” cause the real nightmare are the neighbors.
  • I say just let them ghost demon clowns take Robert.
  • So the house knows your fears and uses them? Why was Aunt Elizabeth afraid of yard tools?
  • shoot it Harold!! it’s a harpoon gun.
  • Big Ben needs to be finished off
  • Harold drunk himself to drunk
  • Jimmy lives in the bathroom vanity mirror
  • haha…boney bat boy is kind of nifty with a shotgun
  • Undead Ben is actually pretty durn cool. Kind of reminds me of Swamp Thing.
  • I have never climbed onto a roof on a 2 story house. Happens on TV and Movies all the time. Maybe I live in the wrong places.
  • You can’t hurt me anymore…and just like that…done.
  • Cheesy Stud?

Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

Olympus Has Fallen (2013) – Filmsack Show Notes


Oh hi,
Yeah…this Mike…but hey don’t call me by my real name on an unsecured line…refer to me by my callsign….Big Mac
Right. Right. Wow, that is a lot to take in. Listen, I’m a bit disposed at the moment so could you sum this up and make it like my preference of underwear…yeah that’s right…briefs.

So How bad is it? “The Front fence has been breached. There’s a C-130 burning on the South Lawn…and a gunfight raging on the North….” Yeah…that’s bad. What’s the good news? Morgan Freeman is now President. Well I’m not seeing a problem here. Let’s just cut our loses and build a new White House with Morgan Freeman as the President. Job done! Call it a day.

oh…they have the kid?…Alright….Let me finish up here then….GRUNTS….MORE GRUNTS….Ahhhh….The Package is in the pool. I repeat…the package is in the pool. Operation Taco Drop is a success and I am initiating “jiggle the handle” protocol. Uh oh…not good…this day went from bad to shit.



Olympus Has Fallen (2013) – Like Owen Wilson said in Armegeddon… “Scariest Environment Imaginable. Thanks -That’s all you gotta say. Scariest Environment Imaginable” Wow


  • Is this the movie about White House Down?
  • I hope this movie doesn’t suck
  • Nice Font Choice?
  • Meanwhile up at Camp David in the snow
  • Red,White and Blue Boxing
  • “He likes it when you call him Dries?”
  • Christmas time is a great Action Movie time
  • “Mustang, this is Big Top, Bringing out the Full Package.”
  • This is a horrible idea. Driving in the snow. Right Diaz?
  • Gee…I wonder if that kid will have to use all that Mike knowledge about the White House?
  • Ice freezes on Bridges…also, where did that limb come from?
  • Seat-belts get stuck a lot in movies. What’s the numbers in real life?
  • The Package is in the pool. I repeat…the package is in the pool.
  • 18 months later … also, July 5th
  • Apparently, he is absent. He don’t go to July 4th BBQ with his girl
  • Watching the flashbacks makes me realize that he should have been quicker to pull out that knife and cutting seat-belts. Mike
  • How in the hell did the president eat all the Rocky Road in the white house last time?
  • Mike doesn’t roll into this job at the Treasury Department until around 10:15AM…sounds like he traded up
  • Ooooh. So Mike told Speaker of the House (Morgan Freeman) to go F* Himself
  • Mike clocks out around 7PM?
  • Code 9-9-9
  • That plane is up to no good!
  • I like to think that the Capital has Anti-Aircraft concealed in the roof.
  • Oh man…this movie done got violent. How does a plane of this type reach right into the heart of the capital with only 1 encounter with the Air Force?
  • Oh…they just gonna blow themselves up…so we got suicide bombers and hide in plain sight terrorists with a variety of firearms…like 20 or 30 of them…and a bomb on a bus.
  • Have you seen Connor! Where is the president’s kid!
  • Meanwhile down at the Pentagon…How bad is it? “Front fence has been breached. We’ve got a C-130 burning on the South Lawn…and a gunfight raging on the North….” F*CKING SH*T is right
  • Release the hounds!
  • Sniper…let me show you how to snipe with a pistol
  • Forbes…what are you doing Forbes…
  • …and now an army of trash trucks.
  • We gonna ground these trash trucks…
  • No Tim…you were our good friend.
  • PEOC has gone offline…
  • To quote Owen Wilson from Armegeddon… “Scariest Environment Imaginable. Thanks -That’s all you gotta say. Scariest Environment Imaginable”
  • Whaaa…Scary Korean guy don’t need glasses!
  • as Brian Ibbott says in this movie…”They’ve taken the White House.”
  • I got to say…it seems like it would be a lot easier to take the president hostage anywhere other than the White House.
  • Dangit…don’t you bring up 1812 the day after The 4th of July
  • I watched this movie on the 5th of July…am I patriotic or what?
  • I got to believe that we would just blow up the White House before letting someone rule the roost.
  • Really not a fan of Rugged Good Looks Ross.
  • Play that somber music!
  • Smuggy Smuggington. It takes 15 minutes for armed forces to reach the White House…we took it down in 13.
  • “Hey…what was that sound…oh…it was death..”
  • A pic of Connor!! Noooo. I’m only here to be emotionally invested in innocent kids.
  • Mr. Kang!!
  • Wow…he still has a lot of clearance to use his thumb to reactivate.
  • Chopped off the tip of the Washington Monument.
  • “What’s the going rate for souls these days?”
  • Forbes is so GQ
  • Well Mr. Speaker is now the President.
  • I really don’t see the problem. You got Morgan Freeman as the president…time to cut your loses and build a new White House in Virginia
  • Echelon 4…Banning.
  • Took a Lincoln to the head.
  • Cerberus…So change the codes. uh…hello….
  • Damnit Truman…you had to do upgrades to the walls…he’s in the walls…and with that info all the Koreans start creeping slowly towards the walls.
  • Is the kids designation “Spark Plug?” or is that something Mike just likes to say.
  • Don’t tell the kid “I will see you on the other side…” I’m sure that is what they told him about his mom.
  • Spark Plug received…now time to get real.
  • Mother killed by America Bomb
  • How do they have a picture of Mr. Kang if no one has ever taken a picture?
  • “Hey Asshole” Classic
  • Let’s play a game of “F*ck off” You go first.
  • Not even under presidential order would I give codes.
  • This is so Die Hard…Conversation with the traitor because you trust him.
  • How can Rugged Ross not fight any better than that. I thought he was an agent like Mike.
  • Kang is such a cartoon bad guy…he should have gotten all the codes like in 5 minutes. He is conveniently absent for minutes at a time.
  • Hydra Weapon? That’s some slow ass weapon.
  • Hydra 6
  • Hydra 6 is 4 sentries…Taking out Tigers.
  • How can such a fast weapon on deployed be so shit slow getting to its destination
  • We do not negotiate with Terrorist…
  • Why would you take the most resistant hostage. Uh oh.. Video feed is down….that means they need a new camera
  • Zag…Zig…Do something
  • Mike is John Wicking this house…
  • Dumbass…dur…how did the President not see that coming. That was the first thought. Launch the missiles dumbasses….like fire them to the space.
  • This has to be the stupidest president ever.
  • Finally…they shot the President…now finally Morgan Freeman can take his rightful place.
  • Don’t help President..
  • Knife to the brain…just like I called it.
  • OMG…Backslash Niner! HASHTAG! Who made this password!
  • Suck it Cerberus…now take this stupid shit offline.

Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

Eight Legged Freaks (2002) – FilmSack Show Notes


Oh hi,

Cut! Ok, David…no not you in the green suit holding the tennis ball on a stick pretending to be a spider. David Arquette. Yes you. A word please. Look, I love the energy you are bringing to the set today. It’s 100% better than the wet blanket acting you were doing yesterday. Oh… you did did you. You looked up acting tips on Yahoo last night did ya? Oh you mean the number one search engine for 2002. Ahhh…well that explains it. So you decided to go with the “Acting is Reacting” method like you seen in the WWF…which is still the WWF because it is 2002. Bravo.

Now stop it. Bad David! Bad! What’s that? No! You’re the 2 legged freak! Ya 2 legged freak! Oh you want to get physical. Alright…Let’s go…I’ll rip that stripper’s bikini area right off your adorable little face and then write a barber scene into the movie to explain it’s disappearance. Oh you think I won’t! I’ll do it right now…gimmie a piece of paper…”Alight…Scene: Chis sits in the barber chair…Floyd the barber…yeah that’s right..Floyd the Barber…that’s all the effort I’m putting into it David.”

And that’s what really happened on set…True story.



Eight Legged Freaks (2002) – Like sucking on a hose full of radioactive spiders. phft phft pass me those Doritos.


This is a story of Monsters.


Prosperity Arizona.

Wake up people! Wake up people before it’s too late.

“Say something with caffeine in it.”

So often am I hauling off nuclear waste and it ends up in the local lake…pond…pool.

One Week Later….

Meanwhile down at the Spider Farm…

“I see dead people…”

These crickets are nuclear big.

Only in the movies can a middle aged eccentric store owner, scientist, cop, theater owner be best friends with an 11 year old and it not be questioned. It’s the modern day apprenticeship role that no longer exists in our society.

Spider Farm!

It’s on me ! Get it off.

Another Week Later….

Meanwhile on a bus heading to town. The prodigal Sonny.

This music is 90s..but this movie came out in the 2000s

Poor Pete

ScoJo! So young.

uh huh…Joshua is deead.

Prop 101…this is a town meeting and not wwf.

Old Man McCormick is dead…oh. hey…it’s Chris McCormick. Gone for 10 years.

Poor Pete…Everybody pushes Pete around.

Zeke the cat put up a good fight…that is not how drywall works…but neat

Chris beats up a lot of people.

Emma left Pete….Poor Pete…I have an intolerance to dairy…I’m just a little bit mucussy right now.

Ouch. Trailer Trash Sheriff.

Look at that tech! Is that a Windows Powered PDA?

No Parrot!

What is this kids passion? Spiders? Research? Reporter? Adventurer? Scientist?

Why don’t I have a Study?

They never believe the kid…

Who the hell sucks on a hose that is clogged? Who does that?

Oh cripes…he sucked up those giant baby spiders!

So the mayor is in on the contaminated waste racket…after his frustration with all the get rich quick schemes of Chris’ dad.

He has an Ostrich farm…which is good eating for giant spiders.

Trope…doom sayer.

Let’s talk about the probe…let’s talk about the anal probe.

eek Shock to the nuts.

Brett really is all about himself. He was perfectly fine for that truck driver to die to save his bacon.

Dirt bikes…2002…that was more of a 90s thing I thought.

Was Gladys’ house attached to the mines?

it’s my Media induced paranoid delusional nightmare

If acting is reacting…then David Arquette is doing some serious acting!!

Lee Harvey Oswald Rifle. Why do we have that? I do not know.

Just trying to give a shave. Floyd and some guy. Leroy? Bob?

Continuity error. When Floyd is running from Bob’s death you can see someone has already busted out the front window with the hat rack

I hate jumping spiders.

Finally shaved that thing off his face.

Poor Pete.

These spiders have an off sound when running around.

The Jumper.

Let’s all meet down at the mall.

oh man…the Doritos bag from 2002 looks a lot older than I would have imagined.

KFRD has 4 more payments on that shit.

These spiders sound like gremlins

The sound fx in this movie are weird.

Those citizens outside…screw those guys…we got the gate closed.

“Let’s listen to the kid…for once.” – Chris

the plan. Head to the roof and hook up to the antenna.

Wade the mayor is going to sneak out.

This has to be the most accurate shots fired ever.

Damnit Norman the Mall Maintenance guy.

Vote yes on Prop 101

Nooo….not Pete!

I would have preferred this movie being told from Pete’s perspective

Harland really has a thing about Anal Probes

What is Brett and Wade’s relationship? Dad? Step-Dad?

Chris can’t even kick out a air grate. weak

Floyd the pitchfork barber. Coward!

Chris knows mine stuff.

Methane gas. No Sparks.

Stupid Norman and his poor vision…we all know it would be the death of him.

Follow the cables!

This town is full of no good nicks. They will leave you to die in a skinny minute…except Chris…Your town has to be pretty shitty to make David Arquette the hero.

How did Chris know the Spider’s name? I don’t recall anyone telling him that. He also keeps telling people to listen to the kid. Is he some kind of time traveler when the kid is all grown up?

He totally did not check all the cocoons.

Gold Mines…what a weird ending.




Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

I Am Legend (2007) – Filmsack Show Notes

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Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

The Mummy (1999) – Filmsack Show Notes


Oh hi,

I know as a priest and as a member of the gold man group here; I’m not really supposed to chit chat..however, does this body paint make me look fat? No? It’s all those cheeseburgers from the Burger Pharaoh? Well, that’s rather honest. Your Strength gives me strength i guess?

Hey…don’t poke me in the belly.. Look what’cha did. You smudged my belly paint. Come here. Come on….so we can rub belly’s together like a couple of pigs in the mud. ooooh yeah…this is inappropriate as hell.

UH oh, hi Mr. Pharaoh sir. Us…oh nothing just some priestly rituals you wouldn’t care about….uhh…what’s that now… Have we seen your Mistress? Um…no…but if you are so concerned about her where abouts you really should have put a ring on it. No…I have not heard of the Hom Dai. aaaah…gotcha. In that case..c’mon on in My Pharaoh sir and head back to the catuary behind that thin veil there.

Really starting to see why they don’t let us talk. Hom Dai indeed.




The Mummy (1999) – Like reading from the Book of the Dead…Nooooo…Don’t read from the book! Watch the movie instead! It’s still Juicy.


Is anybody else hot? I’m hot. and I think I got sand in my underwear. Wait…I’m not wearing any!

Somebody has a furry obsession. Look it’s a man with a wolf head…no it’s a cat with a man’s head…no wait…that guy is wearing a beak!

Egypt is always about the big brass and drums and the tiny little wood winds…

Thebes…City of the living…5 blocks (Dunes) down from Not So Thebes…city of the damned

Hey I run Seti on my computer! I ain’t found squat.

Imhotep…bubba..the Pharaoh’s high priest…sup…I’m a high priest…sup..and keeper of the dead…sup. Do these brownies taste high to you?

No man is allowed to touch the Pharaohs mistress…should o’ put a ring on it!

A lot of bald heads and booty in this movie Golden!


“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” …. “nothing…just petting this cat…oh wait…this is just a statue.” Has that cat been touching you?

Cheap ass rub on tattoos

Some people should not be painted in gold…like a group of middle aged white guys with bellies pretending to be Egyptian. Who are these guys anyways? They just hang out at Imhoteps place opening and closing doors and eating too much?

Priesthood is not good for the abs in Egypt.

Hamunaptra, city of the dead – 1290 BC and the Black Book of the dead

He’s gonna get the Hom-Dia

Ummm…why would you kill someone by Hom-Dia if it meant they could come back with such great power?

Modern Day 1923?

Magi…the Pharaoh’s Body Guards ….Why are they so much more pale than their ancestors?

“Your Strength gives me strength” This guy

Don’t you close that door Beni…Hold Door! Hold Door!

Sand Face Sinkhole!

Star Wars wipe

Actually…Modern day 3 years later. 1926

3 volumes of Seth! That is 3 too many!

Who sets up library shelfs in a dominoes layout?

Erick Avari is always in the desert

Hi Sis! Stupid spoiled rich kids.

It’s the map to the place of the dead!

Oops I burnt it! Lies!

He looks like George of the jungle.

Now we have to watch him strangle…

He cleans up nice.

She wants to bring her parents back with the book of the dead? More valuable than gold.

She is hung up on that kiss.

he is the map… I’m the map

The Magi are very flammable

Race to the treasure

“Guess who’s got all the horses!!?” -“Hey Beni! You’re on the wrong side of the river!!”

“500 cash bucks” bet

Ancient Egyptian Secret.

Awww…he got her a brush kit

I hate bugs…What do you mean bugs? I hate bugs

For the record….don’t put me down for mummification.

Bugs under the skin is always a horror show.

Pressurized salt acid to the face!

The Umbrella man. Always running with his umbrella.

Don’t make me blow us up with this dynamite

Librarians need adventure too.

Death will come on swift wings for whoever watches this movie.

Be sure to read the Egyptian curse in an ominous voice.

“This mummy is still juicy.”

That key opens everything!

The librarian is going to Library that book.

“Nooooo! You must not read from the book!”

The 10 plagues of Egypt.

oh c’mon Daphne. Get your glasses on.

Ha…he’s walking like the old school universal mummy

That is not how taking eyes and tongues work.

Also, if you are going to steal some eyes…best probably not to steal the eyes of a guy with poor vision.That is why he thinks the Librarian is his love.

I have the same reaction when my cat plays on my piano.

Thanks for the Plague Report. 100% Chance of plague locust and boils.

Like sands through a keyhole.

Why did his face decay when he kissed her? is she cursed? has seen been kissing her cats?

I like Winston. Ha uh ha ha

“Hey Winston. Peddle faster!”

Poor Winston. Died what he loved doing….

This movie has a lot of mummy smashing.

love the sound and music in this movie. So good.

Still trying to escape with his gold.



Film Sack Filmsack Notes Podcasts

Stargate (1994) – Filmsack Show Notes

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