Please insert Show Intro 3.1…Loading…
and welcome to Filmsack Labs where we straddle the line of what is possible and what is unquestionably going to end in a symphony of screams.
This week we have been working on bringing Virtual Reality based AI into the real world by inserting their programming carts into a pile of silicone nanobots. Essentially creating life! We here at the labs foresee great humanitarian possibilities as a result of this new technology.
Oh hands are going up, alright we have questions. Yes sir, what is your query. “Can we make real world animals like realistic snakes and such with our technology.” Good news! We already have! Would you like to hold her? You would! Excellent. Here ya go I! I expect you will be screaming by the end of this intro.
Ok, next question. Can our technology give Russel Crowe a better singing voice? No…..his voice is already perfect.
Last question! Can we create the perfect woman? Well, why would you want do that…Wait, do you mean like in Weird Science? So you don’t mean “The perfect woman” you mean “the perfect woman.” Oh hell yeah. Reach in that cabinet and hand me that crowd pleaser. No not that one. The one labeled Sheila 6.9.
Hey, anybody hungry? Grab that Sushi Chef 1.2 while you are back there. We are about to get this party started!
Oh no! sensory overload….intro crashed…would you like to reopen? cancel. rebooting Randy.
Virtuosity (1995) – Just because I’m carrying around the joy of sacking your crappy film inside me, doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.
- What is this now? I’ve never heard of this…ohh…from the Director of Lawnmower Man! Is this the same universe?
- Dig this groovy music man. I actually really like this….it is chill…maybe one of my favorite opening credits…
- Characters come in singles and pairs. 01 11 00 10
- All business suits
- “Maybe it’s the uniforms”
- This world is Matrix’esq
- sadistic, dangerous…3 words that describe him
- What do we look for? His eyes? They look like mine? Did they model him after him?
- You got a rice on your face…no problem Gene Simmons of Kiss, or Miley Cyrus
- Busting through paper walls is not as impressive as drywalls.
- Poke my wound hole and I will derezz.
- Too much Neural information.
- Use the convicts to test the VR Trainer
- Sid 6.7 Sadistic, Intelligent, Dangerous
- haha. Denzel looks like Sideshow Bob
- 9 months off for good behavior. 17 years off 9 months.
- Give me my Chalk. I can use right now.
- Metallic Limb detected!
- He was in isolation. Not anymore. General population. Somebody is mad.
- New travels fast. So was he a real cop at some point
- oh…white power eh.
- That guy brought a shiv to a metal arm fight. He gonna lose.
- Denzel is a biter! A lover not a biter!
- How are those prisoners throwing out all that trash through those slots.
- Come get your boy!
- Sushi Chef 1.2. A cart for each version
- I can’t change what I am. I’m a 50 terabyte, self-evolving, neural network, double backflip off the high platform. I’m not a swan dive.
- Just a little notebook flirting.
- “Intriguing…can I write that down?”
- His wife and and kids are dead.
- Another chess Queen reference. Sacrifice the queen.
- She is interactive Clyde.
- Ahhh…Sheila 3.2 Brilliant…Grab her module and follow me.
- Gettin busy
- Just because I’m carrying around the joy of killing your family inside me doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.
- Daryll likes to watch…nah.
- Kicking Sheila 3.2 crystal under the table.
- This guy is thinking Weird Science…and Sid is thinking…I want to kill you.
- Duh…Its a new world Daryl
- Prison run. hoof hoof hoof
- Nanotech Synthetic.
- Mr. Barnes gets a full pardon if he catches Sid.
- So your virtual reality program comes to life and your go to move is to chip the felon and make a deal.
- That is a big brain needle.
- He kept his badge in Mothballs?
- Sid is always getting shit on his face and then licking it off. In VR world he could just lick it off..
- Oh it just got personal! Matthew Grimes killed my wife and daughter.
- Do synthetics not know how to go shopping for clothes off the rack? Do they always have to steal it from folks. yes
- Welcome to our dance club of “Come Hither” and Cameras
- Time for a Rave Symphony! What kind of instrument are you? I am a whimpering.
- Symphony of Scream! Time let very GnR
- Remember the Scream Scene. Louder.
- haha…the elevator bird.
- Shot him right in the back.
- He has to maintain glass mass.
- The Symphony of Collision!!! mu ahaha
- Our hero needs a phycologist. like 12 monkeys
- “Reach in that backseat and hand me that crowd pleaser.”
- Russel Crowe would have made a pretty good Joker
- Sid 6.9 is better.
- Matthew Grimes is a part.
- “That’s how I know…because I know.”
- My purple 150 dollar suit. Now interview me in my underwear.
- All these TVs need to be showing the news.
- Cameras are starting to pop up everywhere…we are almost here.
- Hey! It’s the Rumble Guy! Let’s get ready!
- Kapow…punch everything. Kapow! bum bum…Kapow…bum bum..Kapow
- That guy failed at crowd surfing.
- Sid 6.7 sure likes his human shields.
- what? he killed her?
- “Parker. This one’s for you”
- No arm. No problem. Pew Pew Pew
- When did Sid 6.7 have time to make a embroidered name tag?
- Death TV
- Ed did not enjoy being on Death TV
- Oh great…that was a bad plan…land him in a bunch of glass.
- That conversion process was way too slow.
- Sid can tell the difference between gravity or not.
- How did they fool him?
- Billy is not interested in letting him out.
- WTF Billy.
- So the whole reason for the metal arm was so he could stop that big metal fan.
- If you stand up. It is going to be very bad.
- Bombshop 6.7
|DEVELOPER: Iron Gate AB|
PUBLISHER: Coffee Stain Publishing
|Tuesday, February 2, 2021|
|1st boss fight. Not me|
|^ Game Audio|
|^ First Boss Fight|
|HOW LONG TO BEAT|
|IS THERE ANY DEALS|
|$19.99 (that is a deal!)|
|A brutal exploration and survival game for 1-10 players, set in a procedurally-generated purgatory inspired by viking culture. Battle, build, and conquer your way to a saga worthy of Odin’s patronage!|
|Early Access Viking Themed Survival Game set in a procedurally generated world (purgatory / valheim) with 5 biomes and more to come. Best to stick to the meadows and steams that you are used to until you gather enough skills, resources and trophies to fight each of the biome bosses. You gonna die…perhaps not…if you survive you will be rewarded with some powers…maybe you should just stick to building long houses and boats. By Odin’s beard! Perhaps you should play with up to 10 other players online to get some help. Oh no you chose PVP. Enjoy Valhala you dead warrior. Have fun walking back to camp.|
– Art – Environmentals look great! The character designs could use some work.
– Animation – Movement is ok. Could be improved. But that is really secondary here…have you seen how minecraft moves!?
– Music/Effects – Hit or miss. Meadow music is pretty mellow…but can get a little repetitive. I turned it down. The action scenes are rocking…Most hits give a satisfying feeling.
– V/O – Mostly grunts. Works.
– World Building – Good enough. Most of it is based on Norse Mythology so the base is good.
– Game Play – Pretty solid crack like gameplay. May I have another…sure…just 5 more minutes.
– AI/NPC – Ok. Well balanced. You can’t ignore them but you should be able to easily defeat most as long as you have been skilling up your character and paying attention to where you are.
– Controls – Works well enough in most cases. A lot of hidden keyboard shortcuts that are not announced in game. You have to hunt them down. Building can be hit or miss.
– Interface – pretty minimal. It works. Most times. Unless you need to build something. Get out of here hammer!
Endgame – Build a nest in the AllFather’s Facial Hair and snuggle in for some Valhala like snuggling.
8 ‘By Odin’s Beard’ out of 10 Valhalas
|Tags: Open World Survival, Craft, Survival, Online Co-Op|
|Little Nightmares II|
|DEVELOPER: Tarsier Studios|
PUBLISHER: BANDAI NAMCO Entertainment
|Wednesday, February 10, 2021|
|HOW LONG TO BEAT|
|IS THERE ANY DEALS|
|$25.79 – Green Man Gaming|
|Little Nightmares II is a suspense adventure game in which you play as Mono, a young boy trapped in a world that has been distorted by an evil transmission. Together with new friend Six, he sets out to discover the source of the Transmission.|
|I did it for the feeling of dread. |
Awaken in the wilderness as a kid so ugly he has to wear a bag on his head. He’s Mono the bagboy and he is pretty sure he is going to die about 100 more times before he gets out of this Little Nightmare…II..
I love the Little Nightmares games. I played the first and I couldn’t wait to dread it again and last week Tarsier Studios delivered 5to10 hours of singleplayer sidescrolling stealthing, platforming, puzzle solving all while trying not to die in 5 chapters of terror filled with terrible creatures that bloat, stretch and crawl their way to your very soul! STOP TOUCH ME! Eeeek
– Art – Beautifully Creepy and Grotesque
– Animation – Amazing. Almost Dark Souls’esq in some places
– Music – Ratchet!
– V/O – Mostly mumbles. No real languages to lock this into a region.
– World Building – I would not want to live there. But well played.
– Game Play – Better than the first. I rarely got lost and I always felt like I was progressing through the world.
– AI/NPC – Pretty good. Occassionally random. Probably plays well to the Oh Shit factor.
– Controls – Serviceable for the most part. I found myself stuck in nooks and crannys too often for my tastes.
– Interface – not much to speak of.
Holding 6 upside down (that is a 9) out of 10 Oh Shits
|https://store.steampowered.com/search/?term=Little Nightmares II|
|https://www.igdb.com/search?type=1&q=Little Nightmares II|
|Tags: Adventure, Horror, Dark, Singleplayer, Puzzle, Platformer, Side Scrolling|
Oh hi guy,
This week on Filmsack we are mining the very depths of Canadian Horror Entertainment … (exasperated breath) …. SAH-ree guys. I don’t know if I can do an intro this week. I’ve just been pretty bummed ever since I found out they canceled the Valentine’s Day Dance. I was really looking forward to you guys finally meeting my Canadian girlfriend.
Anywho, said “totally real Canadian girlfriend” left me a heart shaped box of what I can only assume is chocolates and a note that I am now going to read for the first time right here on the show:
“To whom it may concern, (always a good start)
You are invited to a Saturday night at you-know-who’s house where we will be celebrating the holy holiday of the horny… aka Valentines Day.”
“All Filmsack miners are welcome.” (that is miners with an ‘er’…not ‘or’…just to be clear.)
“The party will commence at sun down and will include all the Moosehead you can stomach and all the miners you can kiss.” (once again; that is miners with an ‘er’)
It continues, “We will be playing all of your beloved Canadian party games like Twister…. Pin the Axe in the miner…SAH-Ree the board game, Pranks that End in Death, Uno and everyone’s favorite Canadian game Bobbing for Weiners.” That’s Jokes!
“Looking forward to seeing you there. Yours truly. The one armed man.”
ok, turns out that was not from my actual Canadian Girlfriend… but this guy seems nice. So hey, would anybody like a piece of chocolate from my totally not a human heart in a heart shaped box that I am not going to even look at before offering you some. No? ok. and now for someone who has been to Canada and lived to sing a ballad about it..Randy.
My Bloody Valentine (1981) – Like getting one of them nasty conversation candy hearts but this one says Be Mined and now your dead. That’s Jokes!
- Bloody L.
- Meanwhile, down in the mines
- View askew
- That miner is a lady!
- No way does her hair and makeup stay like that…
- Stop stroking my breathing tube
- Oh no…he hates heart tattoos! Impaling we will go.
- Stop grab-assing you bunch of
- A hot time on Saturday Night!?
- I’ll give her my valentine! Well yeah…I mean it is Valentines…that is what you do.
- ohhh…the town is The Little Town with the big heart…cause of all the red meat.
- These miners are trouble….
- A love triangle!
- “Suck it in and zip it up!”
- First Valentine Dance in 20 years.
- “Hi Guy” – Ketchup head.
- TJ couldn’t make it on the west coast. He is the mayors son.
- Comes from the heart …what does that card say? Poetry.
- Where are they speeding off to after finding the heart?
- Stabbed his birdie finger.
- The Harbinger of Dooooom
- Down at the Union Hall flashback…tradition for over a 100 years.
- 7 Miners…5 below…2 supervisors above…1 man alive…but he was crazy!
- A warning from Harry…never hold the Valentines dance again.
- Sea Shanty…Harriett…Valentine Virgin name Harriet.
- What are you guys doing with a loose heart? Lady in her 30s
- oh…you said Be Mine…I thought you said Be Mined.
- Everybody: A box of candy! Nobody: Heart.
- Madame Mabell is dead!
- A little protein patrol.
- These guys all sound Canadian
- Everybody is a harmonica player.
- Take a look at my Hairy Warden…by court order.
- TJ vs Axle…the
- Cut down to here…slit up to there…I may not get out alive.
- Upside down heart…what does it mean!
- Something smells funny…nope…not my pipe…maybe it’s these hearts.
- Yelling at the screen…it’s right there! the big bloody dryer ya moron!
- Manniger Mines.
- Harry’s Back
- It will happen thrice…that is the worst lyric yet.
- His name is Jesse…
- Technically…it was heart failure.
- Durn Bartender and his meddling and warnings.
- Moosehead Beer
- Damn kids….Bartender…
- The Bartender just couldn’t get enough of his own joke and now he is mined.
- yay!. It’s just chocolates. ahhh…it’s Mabel
- While it would certainly hurt to bob for wieners.
- The favorite Canadian Mining Town game of bobbing for wieners was short lived.
- It’s yours…Keep it clean
- Howard makes me gag!
- Nothing creepy here…just a bunch of clothes on hooks.
- Like a bad game of Marco Polo…John….Sylvia…John…Sylvia…death!
- We work in the mines everyday…lets head down there during the party.
- Hoss…big boy Hoss.
- You know the rule…no women in the mine.
- This is the worst Tunnel of Love ever (ride down to the coalmine)
- Everybody hates Howard the beer snorting bafoon.
- These horny Canadians.
- Hey you guys!
- Cars: It is hard to get traction in this movie.
- Howard says that Harry Morgan is dead. Nobody knows that.
- He really screwed Harriet and Mike.
- Well there goes my Howard theory…like a sack of taters down a mine shaft.
- Axel or TJ Axel or TJ
- A shovel to an pick axe fight.
- How progressive…she ain’t no damsel in distress.
- Axel…why? Well here is a flashback to daddy being killed by Harry. His dad was the supervisor.
- Harry Ward…Gone Away…but he’ll be back.
- Ok…they got their own Ballad.
Ok Mr. Cole I’m going to ask you to relax while I attach these alligator clips to your “face fat” and then we’re just going to shove your “3-times-naked Bruce Willis Ass…ok…Will-Ass….” yep going to show you right into our Woody Woodpecker, cartoon inspired, “time tube.” Woo hoo.
Like a big ole naked wiener…covered in a condom… to insure your travels are safe. What’s that? You say you are good at remembering things…best not to remember this Mr. Cole. But don’t worry, it’s safe….like an MRI machine but it’s not an MRI machine in a basement and all of this is not just in your head in some sort of divergent reality on planet Ogo.
Alright, one more alligator clip. I think this one goes to your right nipple…nope nope… already got one there….this is your classic left nipple alligator clip situation…nom nom nom…and there..ok enough Monkey Business. Alright, hold onto your butts I’m firing up the time tube. Clear!
is he gone? ok, let’s go shopping! Randy, Colonics For Everyone!
Twelve Monkeys (1995) – asking the tough questions. What did you do with you time? Did you waste it on drugs? Women? This movie? Are you also divergent, friend?
- how many monkees?
- “…5 Billion People Will Die From A Deadly Virus in 1997…
…The Survivors Will Abandon The Surface of the Planet…
…Once Again the Animals Will Rule The World…”
- Excerpts from interview with clinically diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic, April 12, 1990 – Baltimore County Hospital.
- Break out the accordion.
- Witness, the death of the man…into the eyes of old man Bruce Willis.
- Volunteers come back to the 7th Floor…or they get pardoned.
- Volunteer Duty!
- Let me put on my body condom.
- oh no. Christopher Plummer!
- We need a volunteer to head to the surface….don’t let the suit become compromised or you are not coming back.
- Hissing roach collection…and now there is a bear.
- That bear don’t seem hungry.
- So the end came during Christmas….
- …also collected…spider.
- Doves are good and it sounds like other birds as well. Owls.
- and lions…oh my.
- “We did it” – Red Monkey!
- I could do with 100% less Bruce Will-Ass
- 87645 (astrophysicists)
- 25 to life…you are going to hurt us…are you mister cole.
- Why don’t you sit down in the metal chair that is wired.
- TV Ball…can you see us?
- Yet among the myriad microwaves / the infrared messages / the gigabytes of ones and zeros / we find words, byte-sized now / tinier even than science / lurking in some vague electricity. / But if we but listen / we hear the solitary voice of that poet telling us / Yesterday this day’s madness did prepare / tomorrow’s silent; triumph or despair / Drink, for you know not whence you came, nor why. / Drink, for you know not why you go, nor where.
- Meanwhile, 1990
- See through lady’s raincoats
- He put 2 police officers in the hospital.
- Cole does not like to be asked about his ID. He gets agitated
- He was volunteered because he was a good observer. Got a tough mind.
- Need to go. Drooling.
- He thought it was Oct. It is April. He thought it was 1996. It is 1990. Oops
- South of France? I can’t go to South of France. I just need to make a telephone call.
- More scrubbing…everyone is always scrubbing Bruce Will-Ass
- They are always playing loud TV in the Asylum.
- Jones is doing the turtle…
- 5 thousand dollars….
- Don’t play the games…you are volunteering.
- plague of madness. Can’t let them call. Doctors discretion
- Anti-capitalist Pitt.
- He kept asking for shows that have already played….but the nurse change time.
- L.J. Washington. He doesn’t really come from outer space. Ogo. I am mentality divergent….when I stop going there…I will be well.
- “I don’t really come from outer space.” ….’Oh. L.J. Washington. He doesn’t really come from outer space.’….. “Don’t mock me my friend”
- “It’s a condition of mental divergence.” “I find myself on the planet Ogo.” “Part of an intellectual elite…preparing to subjugate the barbarian hordes on Pluto.” “But even though this is a totally convincing reality for me in every way, nevertheless, Ogo is actually a construct of my psyche.” “I am mentally divergent…in that I am escaping certain unnamed realities…that plague my life here.” “When I stop going there, I will be well. Are you also divergent, friend?”
- A board of intellects. Always a board of 6. With 2 enforcers.
- Dr. Cassandra (complex) Railly (french to mock/jest)
- Reoccurring nightmare of the death of who we assume are his parents when he was a child. His father is shot in an airport.
- oh!! I found a spider! He is my spider now!
- Crazy is Majority Rules.
- Why did he eat the spider?
- I’ve managed to contact certain underlings, evil spirits, secretaries of secretaries, and other assorted minions who will contact my father. And when my father finds out I’m in this kind of place, he’ll have them transfer me to one of those classy joints!
- Colonics For Everyone!
- My father is god. I worship my father. – Jeffery
- Monkey Business (Marx brothers)
- No more monkey business…let’s take it down.
- The real problem is polluting the timeline. We already destroyed everything else.
- haha…The My Pillow Guy wants him to go to the Keys. Foreshadowing of his final demise.
- You are the most bootiful woman I have ever seen….
- It is always a party of 5 against him. Party of 5.
- 4 year she has worked with the others.
- The guy who shot him in the airport is the guy from the asylum.
- Not a prob Bob.
- Haha…alligator clips are one way to make a connection to your face.
- Oculus symbol! Into the tube
- 6 Scientists.
- You failed again…this is not the 3rd quarter of 1996 dummies.
- Chicken little is sane and “Let’s go shopping is crazy.”
- Jose! They sent Jose back as well….More Bruce Will_ass.
- ok…so was there just a short hop into the 1st world war?
- So the scientist have failed a lot sending people back in time.
- Now the radio is telling him to go to the Florida Keys.
- He went underground when he was 8.
- Little 9 year old Ricky Nueman boy cried wolf.
- The time tunnel is a cartoon idea…Woody Woodpecker.
- I love this air. I love this music.
- The Army of the Twelve Monkeys
- She had a chance to run….
- No sir old bob…is he here…is he there…does he exist in time.
- It’s in the tooth…I fooled ’em…I got no teeth!
- He beats him up like a monkey. We all just a bunch of monkeys..
- haha…All I see are dead people! He said the thing!
- Do you recognize Pig Face. Pig Face!! FAA…
- Jeffery Goines is a Judas! You Judas!
- She is a doctor…of the head! not the leg.
- He loves seeing the sun.
- Maybe he is Jeffery Newman.
- They lowered a monkey down the hole. The monkey had a roast beef sandwich.
- You dropped your gun!
- Maybe she is the crazy one
- Goines thinks she knows everything he is going to do
- cracked up whore and crazy dentist
- she left the message
- She doesn’t know the future…but she thinks she does.
- Vertigo is always changing to the viewer.
- …and now he is confusing “The Birds” It was a Hitchcock double feature!
- Well it’s too late now. He released them all!
- She mentioned she had seen him before. Was it in the picture she was researching for her book?
- It is always the same movie. It always happens the same. But each time we see it different?
- Reincarnated. She can still save us all. She can tell him when he is a boy and fix it.
- Jones is my name….she is in insurance. She insures the future always ends.
- This film has a lot of nods to the french
- Numbers, 5 (goodness) number of deaths/amount Jeffery asks for, 6 (incomplete) 6 in the past/6 in the future, 7(complete) floor of the travelers (heaven?), 12(double incomplete!)
- Goines is introduces as just playing around. Games.