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INTRO
oh hi,
We did it Dorian. You said we couldn’t do it. Even after I stole your magic portrait and blackmailed you….You still were a Doubting Dorian weren’t you..But not anymore…We did just as I said…We fooled the League, stole Nemo’s tiny exploration pod and checked off all the evil things on our freaky little supernatural 19th century checklist. Damn It feels good to be the M. That’s short for Moriarty you know.
Say, It’s kind of cramp in this small pod Dorian. How long do we have to be in here before we reach our destination? Wow…days eh….you know what…I’m kinda of regretting that all Mongolian Beef diet we adopted. Can we pop a window? No? Alright, I can hold it.
Hey, do you hear that tapping sound? What is that? It almost sounds like Morris code. What? Morse Code? Are you sure? I’m pretty sure it is Morris code and I’m a genius…sooo…yeah I get that you are old and with age comes wisdom…I get it…but apparently not wise enough to hide your portrait of doom..
Oh my god…why does it smell like a Sweaty Scotsman Ass in here. Are you sure there are no windows…a porthole…a vent…and why is your knee touching my knee…give me some space man. What do you mean it is not your knee…of course it is your knee…who else’s knee could it be…and there goes the tapping sound again.
This is going to be one long Extra Ordinary trip of Gentlemen. Randy.
LINKS
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0311429/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_League_of_Extraordinary_Gentlemen_(film)
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003) – “May this new Century Be yours son, as the old one was mine.” Meanwhile in Kenya. A witch doctor. Don’t you die on me! olo lo lo
SHOW NOTES
- Extra Ordinary
- I think it is important to mention that : “…also promoted as LXG, is a 2003 dieselpunk superhero film” – wikipedia
- Like 1899…it has been all single shot rifles up until now…C’mon London!
- Steam Punk Tank Time….
- Tank Halt…dead…blimey
- Tank: Show me the money. Bank: Folds
- Germans! Leave one behind to tell the rest.
- “Not Us” says Germany…ok…it was us.
- A whole hanger full of Hindenburg. Oh the Humanity
- Meanwhile in Kenya
- Oh yeah! Allan Quatermain…This place has a bunch of Quetermain…
- Yes, of course, Nigel. You should toddle off. Toddling
- Pack for an English Summer
- Quartermain lost his love in Africa?
- Meanwhile in London
- There have been other times…
- Found Nemo
- New Weapons / Machines have changed the game. Race for arms.
- 4 Days to get to Venice and Team of 6 members.
- Abducting scientist.
- Invisible Man is a thief…
- one of these gentlemen is a lady
- Pre-automobile era automobile.
- Blessed by a witch doctor. A Hunter A Scientist. A Stealth. Experience.
- “First meetings usually warrant introductions.”
- Nemo: I walk a different path
- Is Dorian immortal?
- She is a vampire
- The Sword of the Ocean
- Meanwhile in Paris
- Where did Mr. Hyde get such a large hat.
- Her Connery is pretty good
- Scratched by Dorian Gray?
- Demorphing of chained Dr Jekyll is the best.
- He stole plans from the bank Venice plans
- 3 steering wheels
- Sabotage!
- Nemo worships death
- Nina is a vampire chemist.
- The original Suicide Squad
- All this advance tech and still. ticking clock time bombs. Guess it fits with steampunk
- I’m an immortal, sir, not a gazelle
- “The Vampire Lady has us covered.” – 58:00
- The Brave John Bull
- His son died (son-in-law)
- Poor training and doubt. Fear.
- Did Dorian Gray have the gold gun from the man with the golden gun
- Mission Impossible Umasking to reveal…the guy who set them all up.
- She’s falling for the kid.
- That is one dangerous looking exploration pod.
- Surely they must know they are being directed like how they drew away Hyde
- Did he give the Hyde potion to the vampire
- Captain the noise came from this – Recording disc!
- Mr. M has the painting!!
- Misdirection fools
- There is no League…it was a rogue…foool!
- Growl…
- Nemos Science. Skinner Skin Sample. Jekylls Potion. and ninas blood
- Bomb Voyage
- Everybody pitch in…we got a repair montage to do!
- Meanwhile in Mongolia…beef..
- Geez…This feels very much like The Watchmen.
- Betrayal and into the Tundra.
- The White Tiger indicates it is the end and time to be the most fierce.
- Naked and invisible in the snow.
- Nautili …. there are 8
- buckets of hot iron into more buckets of hot iron.
- Got to love a bad guy who enjoys shooting his automatic gun.
- James Moriarty! Mr M
- Dorian’s Balls were broken…but then they healed.
- Oh no! Skinner is burnt naked…now he has to always stay invisible
- No. Not the whole thing.
- Don’t look at the painting…oh too late.
- Super Hyde…Hyde 2.0 … Me on a bad day.
- Nemo went Crazy Blade.
- “There will be others like me….you can’t kill the future.”
- Super Hyde go smash pop
- Back stabbing M just gonna fly away then.
- Can you run faster than a bullet?
- May this new Century Be yours son, as the old one was mine.
- Should have stayed in Africa
- Africa will never let him die. Uh oh…either Part 2 or a Zombie Quartermain ZomieMain
- Just gonna leave this loaded gun on your grave fo some kid to come get the gun then?
- That witch doctor was like….Don’t die on me! Don’t you die on my Quartermain!
- What happened in that Pod. I can’t imagine M, Dorian and a Naked Skinner could have been all that comfy. You may be invisible to the eyes…but pretty sure you are not invisible to the nose.
- Oh hi, I’m glad you could attend the funeral of Allan Quartermain. I am Mr. Invisible and I have to tell you the story of how I almost died from holding in my farts in a tiny escape pod with another man.
- We are going to party like it is 1899
Oh hi. This content is Patreon supported fast-tracked.
It will be freely available to all after a 24-48 hours period.
Oh hi. This content is Patreon supported fast-tracked.
It will be freely available to all after a 24-48 hours period.
INTRO
Oh hi,
… grab your bags and sort your goodies while we spin you a Tale from the Sack:
Well Mr. and Mrs. Freeling we have some good news and some bad news…. The good news is we believe your daughter is still alive somewhere in the walls of your home…the bad news is she is being held there by a Poltergeist. What’s that Marty? I thought you said it was a Poltergeist…Well what did you say? A Poltergeese? What the hell is a Poltergeese Marty? It’s like a Poltergeist but instead of a disembodied human spirit it is a collection of goose spirits that can not find peace to move on into the light? A Poltergeese….. gee Marty, you’re fired.
Unless….Mr. Freeling….didn’t you say this spot, where your home is built, used to be the city park? But they moved the park 5 miles up the road right Mr Freeling. Right….
Oh You son of a bitch! You moved the park, but you left the geese, didn’t you? You son of a bitch, you left the geese and you only moved the park benches and slides!
Carol Anne…if you can hear me…grab some bread from the cupboard and lure the Poltergeese to the light! The light is good Carol Anne! The light is good.
and now for something really evil. Randy.
LINKS
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084516/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poltergeist_(1982_film)
Poltergeist (1982) – We don’t go into the room anymore, it has a clown.
SHOW NOTES
- That thing is in there with my Baby!
- Please all rise for the national anthem.
- that concludes today’s programming…zzzztttt
- Am I suppose to be seeing alien faces?
- Yeah…don’t fall asleep watching TV or the dog will eat your sammich and go make out with your wife and possibly steal your kids chips. This doggie is food shopping once they are asleep.
- She is talking to the TV! What do you look like? Talk louder. I can’t hear you.
- Hi. Yes. I will. I don’t know…I touch your TV face.
- Just some suburbs at the bottom of some hills.
- To Bike and Beer. Stupid RC cars. Nailed it
- Beer spray football.
- Ah shit Tweety….couldn’t you wait till a school day.
- My neighbor is on the same remote? Universal remotes. A Remote Control showdown.
- Is she really going to flush a bird…bad form mother…bad form.
- Which Rams football team is this?
- King Edwards Imperial Cigar Box…Tweety don’t like that smell…put a flower in it. Polaroid for when he is lonely…and a blanket for when it’s nighttime…he ded!
- A Storm is brewing.
- Ha, the dog is licking his lips…gonna totally dig up and eat Tweety.
- Ebuzz the dog?
- “Can I have a goldfish now?” Answer…yes.
- That tree is all kinds of evil.
- Tweety 2 and Tweety 3 want seconds…and they are going to grow up to be sharks when you over feed them.
- Lights out…Closet Light…Closet Light.
- Geez Star Wars…product placement much?
- Am I crazy or am I dead? He is dead.
- Ha! They are smoking doobs.
- Mom is implying she had powers / sleep walking when she was 10.
- He is Reading about Reagan and she is smoking pot.
- We want a pool…3 meter board. 10 feet
- Who the hell has a kidsized clown in their room…these kids…cover it up!
- His Daffy Duck pillow talk is some dirty talk.
- His company built this neighborhood…next to the wise old tree…it knows I live here.
- Good night Dana…get off the phone Dana
- Ha! Cut to kids in the bed with the parents.
- 2:37 AM is sign off
- Smokey static hand!
- It is in the house! It’s in the walls.
- “They’re here.”
- No not Tweety! He is in the wall!
- E.Buzz is a junk food junky
- Chew your food 10 times.
- Who is here? The TV People.
- “Ask Dad…Ask Dad…Ask Dad”
- Now she is just watching Static.
- The Spoon and Fork are bent up
- Construction people are sexist trash.
- Static is no good for you…here…watch some violence.
- E. Buzz wants to play with the people in the wall…
- Good lord…Bluto and the gang are trash…eating food in the windows.
- TV people stack these chairs?
- Do you see them . No huh…you? uh huh
- Phase 1 to Phase 4. They look the same.
- “The grass grows greener on every side.”
- Reach back when you used to have an open mind…before you became a stiff.
- Woo wooo! I want pizza
- Oh great…now she is using the kid! It burns…needs more wax.
- The tickling pulls you…
- what a hard cut to the neighbors house.
- Mosquitoes never suck on the neighbor. Tathill? Ben.
- They got the Mosquitoes.
- Count the lightening strikes…it is getting closer!
- That tree is alive!!! It took the boy!!
- Meanwhile….The closet wants you.
- There is a tornado!
- So does it prey on your fears? Tree for the boy? Closet for the girl? Clown for all of us?
- Holy shit…I don’t recall the tree eating the boy.
- That tree Ent got sucked up.
- The swimming pool! the 2 foot of swimming pool.
- Mom!!! Mommy….Carol Ann is in the TV!
- We don’t go into the room anymore.
- It was a child’s toy. Took 7 hours to cross the room…
- uh huh…
- Tie Fighter!
- Stephen has missed work…but not a beer.
- Poltergeist vs Haunting. – Usually associated with an individual. Haunting is an area. Poltergeist are short in duration vs long term haunting.
- We hear better on this channel.
- Mom has adjusted well. Daddy is a drunk and Daughter is losing her mind.
- Stay away from the light…the light is dangerous…stay the f away from the light.
- Mommy, there is somebody here.
- Jewelry dump.
- She ran through me…and now I smell her…she went through my soul.
- I wonder what they smell like after the monster ran through them?
- Something took a bite out of me in the kids room. It’s them durn goldfish…they got sucked up into the other side and they are sharks now.
- Outer Space…or Inner Space.
- This is like 10 minutes of whispering.
- This kid just came up with the plan…tie a rope on me.
- Grandpa’s spirit is invisible.
- But you said to not walk into the light!
- Some people die…but they don’t know they have moved on.
- Resist the light! Watch TV. Watch their friends grow up…get jealous.
- Oh…and some people just get lost on the way to the light…they get angry and throw shit.
- Geez man…workers ain’t afraid to eat your food.
- This guy about to eat my chicken and make my steak. f this guy
- Meat splosion and maggots
- if your face starts falling apart…how about not pulling on it.
- This movie really brings horror home. Up until this point horror was in castles and apartments…not in Suburbia
- Look at all those lonely souls…TAXI!
- Please not on 60 minutes…or That’s incredible.
- She drank it all…a whiskey drink…
- Leaving Ryan…cause Marty is out!
- Jesus Steve you are looking like shit.
- What you got screwed in that…300 watt bulb?
- He claims the Flu.
- “sounds quiet…yep…no problem…BOOOM!”
- Oh great! Carol Anne was born in that house…she is haunted!
- Starting Phase 5! Nooooo!
- It ain’t ancient tribal burial ground
- in 76…right down there…we relocated the graves.
- Nobody has complained until now…except the Poltergeist!!
- “Y’all mind hanging back? Ya jamming my frequencies.” – Lady
- She has cleaned many houses…
- “I am addressing the living.”
- “This house has many hearts.”
- “The last incident of Bio Location”
- Will you do what I ask even if it conflicts
- There is no death…just transitions to a sphere.
- Carol Ann’s life force gives off it’s own lumination. Life home and earthly pleasures.
- Carol Ann is a terrible distraction from the real light.
- These souls are not aware that they are dead.
- Inside the spectral light is the next phase.
- She can only hear her mother’s voice
- Hold on…shit gonna be bad.
- A terrible presence is in there with her…it is angry..pissed.
- It lies to her. Using Carol Ann to restrain the other to her…it is just another child. To us…it is the beast.
- The beast is so pissed it punched a hole into this world and took Carol Ann
- Can you say hello to Daddy?
- Quickly….who is Carol Ann most afraid of…Tell her she is going to get a spanking…be firm.
- Tell her to go to the light! Run to the light? But you said to not go to the light!
- You little bastard.
- Stephen, give me the tennis ball marked number 1
- Do not sniff the tennis ball…grote.
- Kiss my Ass…Number 2.
- Now tell her to not go into the light! 1 2 3 Red Light…
- throw the rope into the light.
- Take up the slack….take up the slack! gently
- You have never done this before…you are right…you go.
- No time for smooches…
- Pull only when I say!
- Cross over children…go into the light…there is peace and tranquility in the light.
- Dangit Peter!!
- Get them into the water!! they got to be reborn…
- She gonna be alright.
- I feel funky.
- Who put bubbles in the bath water.
- This house is clean!
- Holiday Inn on I74
- Mom has gray hair now
- Carol Ann does not remember anything.
- We are leaving tonight. Take a nap.
- I would not even take a nap in that house
- that e.buzz dog is a pervert.
- If he hates that clown so much…why keep it around.
- Clown gone. I’m gone.
- They still got a lot of packing to do.
- Wiggling on the ceiling!
- From bad to worse…she mud wrestles he way right into the pool pit.
- They didn’t move the bodies…they just moved the gravestones! You cheap bastards!
- The neighbors are not interested in helping but so far.
- Your closet turned into a throat
- Robby really is the worst.
- These explosive caskets!
- You son of a bitch…you only moved the headstones! Whyyyy!
- Do not scream at the driver.
- Daddy…drive away…leave oldest sister.
- that was the angriest house
- slurp…
- TV on a cart…out. Holiday Inn
INTRO
Oh hi,
… grab your bags and sort your goodies while we spin you a Tale from the Sack:
Hello and welcome to the Good Guy Build-A-Buddy Workshop now open in the Chicago Mall….. Today, we have invited a few lucky kids from the Chicago Orphanarium for the chance to build their very own officially licensed and “Totally not Evil” Talking Good Guy Doll.
Alright, little orphaned Andy…grab a metal doll head and some recycled old people dentures from that bucket next to you and get over here and pour some hot plastic all over that mess and I’ll “supervise” from a safe distance.
Hey, you’re doing great Andy! But don’t look at me Andy! Look at the doll! Not me Andy…the doll! Alright, calm down. We have a burn kit on the way…stop crying and grab some eyes out of that bucket you knocked over when you were flailing about.
Now, carefully load those eyes into the eye gun. We are going to have you shoot the eyes right into the dolls face. I know it may sound ridiculous…but trust me…it really is the only way…. Ok everybody it looks like Andy has ironically shot his own eyes out with the eye gun.
Hang on Andy, I have a plan. I’m going to transfer your life force into your doll with a voodoo chant I learned in mall jail a few years back… ok here goes: Mecca lecca hi, mecca hiney ho…..Orange Julius….Corn Dog 7….Give me the power of Claires I beg of you!
Andy? Are you in there? Ok Andy’s dead. No wait…he’s stabbing my leg. It looks like he is going to be fine. Hey Andy don’t do that. What’s that Andy? Call you Chuck. Alright Chuck. Let’s get you back on the bus. Oh you want a piggy back ride…ok…hop on…hey….not so tight Chuck..
and now for something really evil. Randy.
LINKS
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099253/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child%27s_Play_2
Child’s Play 2 (1990) – Because sometimes you have to fight a resurrected demon doll inhabited by the spirit of a serial killer currently hiding in the basement of your foster home with an electric carving turkey knife part 2.
SHOW NOTES
- Chucky is a doll
- Universal Monster for the late 80s and Early 90s
- From Eye to Tunnel of the city.
- That is one burnt chucky.
- 2 like Z for Zorro.
- Fun One Lincoln…I bet Matthew McCanahahaha is in there.
- Oh man…Good Guy dolls are metal underneath with porcelain teeth? no wonder demon occupied.
- Shove them appendages in there.
- So the facility is down by the docks and dump?
- Guy Guy Batteries…Size C
- Play Pal Toys
- Good Guy doll
- Walk and Talk…My stomach hurts. Good news?
- Rumors Hi, I’m the lakeshore stranglers…uh huh huh…
- We rebuilt the doll…we rebuilt him better…stronger…faster…6 dollar man.
- Well give us a minute…we aren’t used to making them manually…
- So we built a mini eye inserter…and now I’m electic and dead…eyes!
- C’mon Andy…let’s talk about it…Talking helps the nightmares go away
- Bad Man in Good Guy Doll…no hell…stay in doll too long and trap…his real name was Charles Lee Ray…and you are the first person I told…so now you are mine.
- Dreams can’t hurt you…unless you are on Elm Street.
- Stick this doll up your ass.
- Go Fish Doc
- Come over and look at this child behind the 1 way mirror…Wanna Foster?
- Ritual Voodoo Charles Lee Ray (the lakeshore strangler) who lives in Andy’s Good Guy Doll…reconstituted.
- Chocolate is my favorite…but I’ll eat eggs.
- Way to go…way to freak the kid out. Hit a Good Guy Truck
- Holy crap…his Foster Parents live in a Barbie Dream House with tons of old trinket shit.
- It’s ok…No foul.
- Uh oh…this Foster Mommy ain’t got nobody to pass onto.
- Age out Foster Kid…gotta make the scratch….
- Foster Mom … are you serious…A Good Guy doll (Tommy)…really lady…you suck!
- Play Pals Toys trucks always be blowing horn.
- Lose your umbrella? No problem…let it go like a balloon
- Stupid Doll won’t fit in my trunk.
- Vodka on 2 week anniversary. How does one have his car full of toys and have time to hook up?
- Car Phone…Bag Phone…beep beep beep.
- Uncle Charles.
- That is a Gold Card…just as good as cash man. No card!!
- Water pistol
- wasting no time
- A storm is coming
- How did Chucky Break Tommy’s Face with a porcelain
- Hey…want me to say your name backwards.
- Give a kid a smoke and he will smoke it.
- Kyle is a chain smoker.
- Sorry Jack…Chucky’s Back.
- Pull them Batteries!
- Mr. Simpson is never getting that figurine glued back together.
- Andy is a pushy swinger.
- Keep your friends close…keep Chucky closer.
- “What do I know about teenage girls.?” more than 2 weeks ago.
- Chucky is always wanting to play. “Hide the soul.”
- Chucky is trying to take over my soul.
- haha…I’m going to get rid of him…by tossing him down the stairs into the basement.
- What is Mrs. Simpson’s accent?
- First Chucky..and now I have to ride the bus.
- Chucky is turning human again.
- Who me? Just playing a little chain ball…yeah…I just stand here by myself and bang a basketball against a chain link fence.
- Get Bent Micro Chip
- Adults always tossing Chucky in dark places.
- He Pumped her in the chest and then gave her 30 licks with the stick.
- ha! He is going to put the kid in the under the stairs cabinet?
- His name is Tommy…look at it!
- electric knife!!
- Tommy’s Alibi…been at the bottom of the stairs all night.
- Sometimes you have to face your demons…in the basement…with an electric knife…and a lot of nerve
- Phil. Neck broken.
- Foster Parent singular.
- Meanwhile, down at the home for crazy kids.
- Most of Chucky’s Day is spent pretending to not be alive.
- ha! She found the body. I did not see that coming.
- Chucky is never where you leave him…unless it is at the bottom of the stairs in the basement.
- Chucky has a knife…Chucky has a knife.
- Chucky has already racked up 3 killings and 2 carjackings.
- Chicago Police!
- “You’ve seen dolls that pee? This one bleeds.” – Redflag!
- Buckle up for safety
- Come on Kyle…just go…don’t bother trying to run him over… “Me screaming at the screen.”
- A little game of Chucky says…Move it…that was a short game.
- That is the 2nd murder Kyle has been involved in. maybe 3…the cops are coming to get her.
- You didn’t think we were going to setup a whole Chucky Factory and not return to that!
- “Close your eyes and count to 7 and you will soon be in heaven.”
- The demon hot line has got to be tired of all the hangups Chucky is always making to transfer his soul. Too late.
- This did not get scary until we got to Desperate Chucky. When he was just annoyed it wasn’t too bad.
- There are Chucky dolls coming down the manufacture line…are there workers there?
- Andy almost got Chucky Eyes implanted into his feet.
- Yeah that maintenance guy had to get the eyes
- Did they just give Chucky Pubic hair
- So what was that one button? the really want to f something up button?
- Andy has a bit of the killer in him.
- That kill box at the top of the conveyor really needs to have a sign that says…Danger. Bad Shit
- Chucky looks like a Garbage Pail Kid.
- We killed Chuck Thrice.
- Kyle is for sure going to have to go on the run. As far as the cops are concerned…she killed her foster parents and the foster home director and kidnapped Andy…and most likely killed Andy’s Teacher and the poor night maintenance guy at the Play Pal Good Guy Warehouse.