Hollywood Homicide (2003) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

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Oh hi,

This week on FilmSack we find ourselves caught up in a HOLLYWOOD HOMICIDE when HBO MAX Max comes running in and starts shooting up our big city karaoke parody rap bar (Ibbott) slash beatnik poetry slam (Jordan) run by a simple county boy (Johnson) and leaves this 2003 Action/Comedy puddle of piss (Dunaway) for us to explain to the authorities. No officer, I did not pee pee my momma’s boy pants when the shooting started. I ain’t no snitch! Now pardon me while I run away! Hartnet brings all the girls to the Yo’g and Harrison’s shots are better than ya’s.

Anywho, I think it’s time we put this whole east coast / west coast beef to bed guys. Obviously, Shake-Shack and In-N-Out burgers each have their own things that they do the best. No sense in escalating this to violence in the streets. When that happens, nobody wins but big chicken. Now, take my order. I would like a big bag of fries topped with a greasy burger sliding out of the bun and a single warm pickle that tastes like what this week’s movie felt like to watch. Oh… This isn’t Five Guys…

Randy, I’m a simple man. I just want to record the podcast and escape with my pee pee still attached to my body. Softened for your pleasure.

I haven’t seen this much Navel Gazing since Ben Affleck dunked animal crackers in Liv Tyler’s belly button hole. Oh… That was navel grazing.

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BRIEF

After music mogul Antoine Sartain’s (Isaiah Washington) rappers are murdered, Sgt. Joe Gavilan (Harrison Ford) and police Detective K.C. Calden (Josh Hartnett) start to investigate. Initially distracted — Joe by his real estate transactions, K.C. by his acting aspirations — the partners pull together when internal affairs officer Bennie Macko (Bruce Greenwood) starts hounding Joe. The two men prove skilled at police work, but they’ll also need help from Joe’s psychic gal pal (Lena Olin).

Rated: PG-13

2003 ‧ Action/Comedy ‧ 1h 56m

LINKS

IMDB – https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0329717/

WIKIPEDIA – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hollywood_Homicide

Rotten Tomatoes – https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/hollywood_homicide

TVTropes – https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Film/HollywoodHomicide

WHERE TO WATCH

Max – https://www.max.com/movies/hollywood-homicide/6ca454e1-8af8-437e-8032-05a2af8dcba2

MORE WAYS TO WATCH – https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/hollywood-homicide

TRAILER/CLIPS

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Hollywood Homicide (2003) – Knee deep in Hollywood Navel Gazing Duck Shit.

SHOW NOTES

Will there be murder?
Shooters come forward to the 20 yard line.
One of these guys is good at shooting.
Here let me help you. Thanks joe.
I think this movie loves Hollywood.
They should call this movie Hip Hop Hollywood. Hey! Is that the Falcon?
Beard Beads Bouncer
Shot my Club up.
Body check…
everybody got a side hustle… Selling houses… teaching standing yoga
H20 Click … Don’t ask.
These guys are good at anything. Harrison Ford is good at shooting.
What do you think? Write this down. Cheeseburger…well done… raw onion.. pickle.. nothing else.
I’m just a poor country boy trying to get by.
I see mayonnaise? Lettuce that somebody tried to scrape off of here.
Don’t call me sir… I work for a living.
Did you get the puddle of piss.
Who does security … bunch of retired a bunch of cops.
Sorta like looking for a new house.
House on Mt Olympus… Man I don’t want no crap on Mt. Olympus.
Research is not soliciting. I’m researching prostitutes.
Hey…it’s what’s his face from everything. Bartender Hank
We been partners for 4 months…now you want to be my shrink.
Pretty soon, I had everything I’ve got tied up in this… this monstrosity… on Mt. Olympus, at the corner of Hercules and, I shit you not, Achilles.
I want to be an actor…. I have to follow my Bliss.
When is the last time you got laid. Say it ain’t so joe.
ASMR Ruby can help… Ruby can do that too.
Smokey… tell me about the future.
Night Owls this is Ruby. Peace…Out
Mr. Sartain…
Think Gavilan will figure this out.
I pay you to run my security…not run your mouth.
A streetcar named desire.
He rented a place to showcase his talents.
Stella!
Wall to wall Hip Hop
I have more time on the 3rd floor shitter than you have been on the job.
I haven’t been in there in 10 years.
What do you keep in your locker?… Tantric sex.
Commingling funds. My whole life is Commingled.
Fuck you very much.
Big girls, little guys…
That was a Guy cop. a cop guy.
Cleo the informant.
Cuffed hands behind the back gun rampage.
and one in the spout.
Who writes this stuff.
We need some bells….
Silk … Andre 3000 … Crenshaw High. The blue Jello girl. She sold a shitload of jello.
What’s this called… tell him the title … NASTY … ohhhhhh.
K-Ro.. Some co-mingling of funds.
Well we got 4 mama’s boys laying on slabs in the morgue.
H20KliK
Mimi…Mona…
We weren’t car thieves…we are repo guys.
Shit…that was a good tire.
get it taken car of now…today.
Kimberly… Shawna… you dog you.
He is always working the ladies.
Friday night is a long time away, kid.
48hrs You’re still huge to me Mr. Duran. you have 72 hours
There are some towels over there… we got a juicy one here.
I think these guys shot those guys.
I don’t need no libary…i need a pool
Doing investigative
Hartnet brings all the girls to the Yog and his shots are wider than yours.
Some racket you have here…
Ok…maybe I got into for the sex.
He’s starting to buy his own bullshit.
Deep and Shallow.
Dominique… close enough
He’s old. He’s young.
3 ex wives and 2 kids.
I’m psychic…
The loves scenes are motown… the gang banging is east coast vs west coast.
Bad Cop. No Donut.
Sex is not sunglasses and a donut… is he dreaming?
3 week anniversary…
Bennies in denial… Bennie Macko.
Guys Keep Score… Lock up when you leave.
I just want to pay the mortgage and escape with my dick still attached to my body…I’m a simple man.
K-ro… paddle boating on out of here. knee deep in duck shit.
Probably one of the more amusing chase scenes … K-ro duck pond chase.
Center yourself. I’m calm.
This is Harbor Division.
He is the Piss Puddle
Leroy Wasley…he was my dad’s partner.
All the pieces are fitting together.
I want to kill him. Then you better go get gud.
I need criminal shit
He’s Ohm’ing
5 minutes of Interview Mayhem phone grabbing and yoga
I took the deal..
Flip a coin … make some shit up.
There is a house on Sunset plaza .. the is nobody there.
Use a psy-chic to solve a murder. How Hollywood.
Joe is supposed to be the skeptic and our guide through this weird-ass movie. They got lost…
This movie is so navel gazzy.
None of these gags are as hard hitting as I believe they intended. I get the reference…just don’t find it relatable.
Now I really don’t like Josh Harnett character…kidnapping kids. But I get the reference. LAPD is a bunch of turds..
It is not a bad thing that we die.
A movie about unrelatable asshole doing unrelatable things.
We took our big guy and relegated him to a punk fleeing down the street.
I love Harrison Ford…but this is not the right movie for him.
Got to keep the business going in the mayhem of crime. We get it.
Don’t beg… Your daddy didn’t beg when he got shot. We call that acting.
Your confession and my performance all on one tape. This will sell well.
The Hollywood Helicopters won’t get out of the way. We get it. They are willing to sacrifice everything to tell the story…because that is the most important.
This rooftop fight scene between an old guy a dirty record producer.. Hollywood Waste.
This movie wanted to say something.
Buddy Cop movie without the Buddy.
I don’t like dead bodies.
Cell phones… Duty calls.
I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day.
I think I’m just a cop.
No rabbit food.