Planet of the Apes (2001) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

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Oh hi,

This week on Filmsack, we let former underwear model and rapper Marky Mark get his funky bunch all over this 2001 remake of… hold on… Wait minute… Mark Wahlberg’s backing band during his rapping years was known as “The Funky Bunch…” like… was that an underwear reference… “Funky Bunch…” oh my gawd… my entire childhood musical adoration was just a thinly veiled underwear joke. Am I a joke to you Mark? You know what… Take your stinking good vibrations off me, you damn dirty underwear model… now starring in this 2001 remake of PLANET OF THE APES now attempting to run from his past only to find himself in the future which is really just the past. So, who’s the monkey now Mark… no one… cause this is planet of the apes… not planet of the monkeys. ooo ooo eeeh eeeh

Anywho, thank you for coming to see me on my death bed / slash / cameo you angry ape child of mine. Closer, I have a dying “death-scene” secret to reveal. You see that coffee table art piece that I always beat the ever loving monkey shit out of you if you got too close to… well… turns out that is just a gun rights conversation starter kit. Go ahead… break it open… sniff what’s inside.. go on… I had it made just for this scene! GUNS!  

Randy, get your monkey ready. ooo ooo eeh eeh ahh ahh… if you know what I mean.

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BRIEF

Astronaut Leo Davidson whips through space and time to a world where apes and gorillas rule the humans. Captured, he is nurtured by Ari and hunted by General Thade as he leads a rebel group of humans and chimpanzees in search of his downed craft. This is his only hope of escape and, ironically, the planet’s only hope of shaking off the tyranny of the gorillas, allowing peaceful humans and chimpanzees to co-exist.

LINKS

IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0133152/

Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planet_of_the_Apes_(2001_film)

Rotten Tomatoes: https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/1108704-planet_of_the_apes

TVTropes: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Film/PlanetOfTheApes2001

WHERE TO WATCH

Streaming: [Check availability on https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/planet-of-the-apes]

TRAILER/CLIPS

Social Media Post

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Planet of the Apes (2001) – You should have let the monkey land this movie. #HumansAlwaysCrash 

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SHOW NOTES

• 2001… not the movie with the monkeys and the monolith… the year.
• Oh yeah. I forgot I liked this music. Reminds me of The Burbs.
• These apes are angry… angry apes!
• In this episode of Filmsack I will be using Ape, Chimp and Monkey interchangeably… so for those simian name nit pickers I say … pthhhh
• This movie starts off Dark… best to watch it in the dark. Thanks Tim “Dark” Burton.
• Space… 
• Monkey Pilot! Monkey no like! Feel like Barrel of Monkey Death. oh… it is just you Marky Mark.
• Randy, stop. I mean it… or no treat… I’m just kidding… I would never do that.
• 2029 Oberon. 
• Space Station full of monkeys… what could possibly go wrong.
• It is just Rocket Envy.
• I’m teaching him. No you aren’t… you are teasing him.
• It has been 2 years.
• uh…. Your space station lost power.
• Every electronic communication from all time… all at once.
• Randy, you get your monkey ready.
• Randy, your monkey launches at 06:00 hundred… even though all the digital clocks have stopped.
• Earpod launched.
• Monkey… then human pilot.
• My poor little Pericles.
• By gawd.. I’m going to go get my chimp.
• Never send a Monkey to do a man’s job.
• Ok… now what Marky Monkey Man.
• uh… was that me in that emergency communication? Yes captain. It was.
• Man Monkey down… Man Monkey down… mayday mayday. Into the swamps of Dagobah… gonna take a jedi to get this ship out of here.
• No time to talk … run… run like a Human!
• that is a lot of Monkey over that hill.
• This one looked at me.
• Take your stinking hands off me… you damn dirty human… he said the thing.
• Humans are stinky… ain’t that the truth.
• I always appreciate a good Amusement Park ride through of a city to really get a vibe of a place and its people.
• What is up with the humans they couldn’t fit in the cart.
• Get ’em out and get ’em clean. chop chop.
• it bit me!
• One thing you don’t want in your house… a human teenager.
• Randy, you stink of humans.
• Love the set design though of the Ape City.
• Human Rights Activist… literally.
• I will say this… the Ape designs in this one is superb. You really get the human actor bleeding through. It really is spectacular. Maybe the best of all these movies to do this. Kudos to the costume / creature design that allowed the nuance of acting to be seen.
• Keep the savage ones out of sight.
• Tim Roth as Thade is such a Thade.. don’t be a Thade.
• The humans breed too quickly… 4 to 1. Just Sterilize them all. Too costly.
• The army burns the bodies before they are examined.
• Senate vs the Army. Your ideas threaten our way of life.
• Let me peek into your soul… aka your mouth
• Thade likes them feisty. Or her dad’s senate influence.
• Thade out…  2nd story leap to his horse.
• Oh how the monkey tables have turned.  Now who is locked up.
• There is a curfew for humans.
• 2 moons… this ain’t earth.
• Something fell from the sky.
• Thades Fist Blade of Fury are scary.
• Not without my daddy.
• haha… one of those House Humans.
• Ape punks… 
• haha… we were in the throws of some sort of sexy monkey act… when the humans came through.
• These apes need some doors.
• That poor little girl
• You go this way… you go that way… the rest of you come with me.
• So in that opening scene with the army over the hill was that the whole city? cause ain’t nearly as many monkeys inside the city.
• You get me out of here and I will change the way you see your world forever.
• Red Ape Army
• No action can be taken without the senate.
• Apes … Monkeys are further down the evolutionary ladder… just above hoomans.
• Apes can’t swim. … Jump scare.
• It is not sorcery.. It is science. Hands off my gun pretty ape
• We are in control now.
• You, I have had enough of.
• To each his own… can’t we all just get along.
• Damnit… you smashed my bang bang
• Declare martial law.
• Apes in cages… riiiight.
• Hey… is that Charlton Heston in that ape suit. 
• In the time before time. We were the slaves and the humans were the masters… Don’t believe me… break open the clay fire… as we do every generation… you will need to cast your won clay encasement for your children so you can have them break it open. 
• Damn them… damn them all to hell.
• Calima… where our creation began. In the time before time.
• Generations of apes.
• Those tents seem impractical… but coool.
• These humans are different. They travel with Apes. haha… jokes… this guy has jokes.
• Horses are great swimmers. Apes… not so much.
• What magic is this!
• Seamos… father of all apes. Monkey Inside.
• Ape don’t like Water… Ape don’t like fire…
• They got some history…
•  They were carried by horses… our horses… that makes me ape leaping kinds of angry… 
• They march like the monkey’s from Wizard of Oz.
• General… till he opposed Thade. He was a great soldier. He trained the other general.
• I didn’t promise them anything. No… you just dropped in from the stars.
• Planet of the Apes. Always running to the truth.
• Calima… Caution Live Animals.
• These ruins are 1000s of years old.
• Nuclear power. Should last forever.
• The apes we brought along were helpful.
• The apes are out of control. Damnit Seamos.
• I am from the future past.
• Damn. where all them humans come from… they all left their homes to be with you.
• How many…  as far as the eye can see.
• Wait… so I know the Apes are from the original monkeys… but who made all these humans. Did they come from the ship or were they already there.
• I’ve been mistaken. Forgive me.
• She can die with her friends tomorrow. Ooooh nah…
• I’m responsible for all of this.
• The universe only rewards cruelty with power.
• Time… I have all the time we need right here.
• Oh… Marky Mark has an idea.
• We can win this… Sometimes even a few can make a difference. 
• Poor planning…. get those children behind the ship.
• This kid… what is the trope… I want to do something… no stay here with me… I ain’t… this will of course go over well.
• Send in the first wave… the knuckle runners.
• ok ok… I am going to stay back here.
• Wave 1 can suck it. 
• oooh… I been wanting to beat the shit out of an Ape for a while now…
• House Human an the Wilhelm Scream
• Holy Shit the butler got in a few good licks.
• The ole… working my way through the crowd that the warrior gets is always awesome.
• Lets fight… wait… is that a ship from the stars?
• Love the fact that the humans all crashed landed… but the monkey killed it with an awesome landing.
• ooohh… Seamose.
• Sir, the prophecy is true.
• Come on. Let’s go explain evolution to the monkey’s
• Father warned me about your guns.
• Lets go explain ricocheted to the monkey. 
• It was Seamos who killed everyone.
• Everything I have believed is a lie. You and your family have betrayed us.
• Let me plea to your ape sense.
• He just a scared little monkey.
• We will leave the graves unmarked… Apes and Humans alike.
• So did the first Ape Seamos keep his given monkey name.
• I’m out of here… I helped seed a planet… but I got to get out of here.
• Randy, farewell spaceman.
• Man. He is not good at landing. Well that is no good. How did Thade get back on earth… Does time and space not even matter to you.
• Soundtrack kicks in the closing credits