INTRO
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Oh hi,
This week on FilmSack we are a Mariachi Bandaro’s worth of desperate DESPERADOs looking for some revenge after Netflix murders our one true love … our left hand … nooo … how will we skip the intros! Quick someone point us to the nearest hot librarian for some impromptu wound repair and hot sex so we can enjoy this 1995 Action/Crime/Drama set in Mehico while we open our guitar gun case that makes us do the O face. Oh yeah… I don’t even miss my left hand.
Anywho, If you have ever have the option to get the band back together by calling up your homies Campo and Quino … you know … the ones you never shut up about…. Well hide the kids. Hide your future wife … cause I’m pretty those guys sure have spent the past decade figuring out how to weaponize their instrument cases and doing lunges so they can strike those uncomfortable poses of death. Honey, I’ll be out in the garage working on a project…and honey, don’t go into my secret shitter lair covered in shit…there is a shot in the face Tarantino in there.
Randy, Take my car, that’s what I bought it for.
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BRIEF
Former musician and gunslinger El Mariachi arrives at a small Mexican border town after being away for a long time. His past quickly catches up with him and he soon gets entangled with the local drug kingpin Bucho and his gang.
LINKS
IMDB – https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112851/
WIKIPEDIA – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desperado_(film)
Rotten Tomatoes – https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/desperado
TVTropes – https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Film/Desperado
WHERE TO WATCH
Netflix – https://www.netflix.com/title/437266
MORE WAYS TO WATCH – https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/desperado
TRAILER/CLIPS
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Desperado (1995) – Like piss warm Chango Beer pulled from the tap…hey that’s my brand and so is this movie. Could have used more scorpions at the scorpion crossing though. Bandaros O face emoji
SHOW NOTES
- Explosions! What is in the guitar case?!
- Buschemi Butt Scooting Boot Boogie
- All I got is piss warm Chango…that’s my brand.
- A guy walks into a bar and tells a story.
- In walks in the biggest Mexican I have ever seen. Dark too…I don’t mean dark skinned.
- Just when you thought you were going to see his face…shadows.
- He ordered a soda pop.
- Especially when he mentioned… Bitch … Bucho… that is what it was Bucho!
- The Client is Always Wrong.
- Not like the high class guys you have in this place
- can I get a cleaner mug…this one is dirty.
- The bartender never gets killed. No the bartender got it worse than anybody.
- Cause I think he is headed this way. I’m clearing out of here. Thanks boys. Ya’ll take care. Back slaps for all.
- Meanwhile at another bar but in a dream…you shot my woman and then put a whole in my hand…you shot my paw.
- I laid the story down nice and thick…how thick?
- What happens when he is dead. It is over. He is the last one. End of the payback.
- Who me? Just brooding in my filthy bed and dreaming of revenge. hot sweaty revenge.
- Scorpion Crossing.. this town has a lot of Scorpion Crossings…
- He can’t beat Cristos I’m not interested.
- Getting your ass kicked by Cristos
- Legs Elbows Knees and Toes. He’ll never dance again.
- So much for Cristos.
- Cast that leg up and Welcome to the Family.
- That is a lot of Trejo Hair.
- I have a house payment…we kill him.
- The service here needs immediate improvement.
- American Attitude..
- And the beer tastes like piss.
- Tarantino Cameo.
- Kidtar…do you play? Good luck kid. You suck.
- My fret hand is dead….
- Practice this everyday…all day.
- Oh man…the piss all over the bar joke .. bar joke.
- he’s pissing everywhere…except the glass.
- Lot of whispering in this movie.
- You’d be happy about it.
- Guess what…he didn’t check out.
- Me and Bucco
- Get the blood bucket and follow me.
- Go through the hidden door behind the shit stall.
- Is there something in the guitar case…my guitar.
- A guitar case full of guns
- Not yet. Not yet…
- These bad guys are Storm Trooper levels bad at aiming.
- But you had to do it the hard way.
- I’m just looking for Bucho.
- If you want to go…go…if you want to stay…relax.
- Empty guns everywhere…break neck.
- Oh…the one that got away…where did he go?
- Shoot me in the back..that is personal.
- Salma Hayek wrecking cars wherevers she goes.
- Just playing some kidtar outside the murder scene.
- Looking for Bucho.
- books store babe. nobody reads.
- isn’t there a hospital..
- I use it to pick up girls.
- painkillers…hot water.
- I don’t think that mop will hold anymore blood.
- Just creepy Trejo being creepy and throwing knives.
- Coffee and Books?
- That guitar case slow rise.
- He keeps a crotch gun in his case…that is what he uses to pick up the ladies.
- Did I thank you? I will.
- I got to go to church to confess my sins.
- good thing we got resolution on Buchos car.
- Bushemi just keeps showing up.
- I told you no more blood baths.
- Campa and Quino
- Good Luck and don’t get shot.
- Home flip phone…who dis? No this is not Bucho.
- what do you mean you have brought someone in?
- Bucho is not the top rung on the later.
- What’s the number to the phone in my car?
- Knife throwing Trejo.
- You brought a lot of knives to this gunfight.
- This movie has a lot of blood.
- Little cousin is working his way up the ladder
- Dark hair dark skin…no kidding.
- Knives and payphone money
- The guitar player…he is a myth.
- Paint the wall red with my blood.
- Damn Columbian’s using KidTar as drug mule.
- Book Stores…everyone is on the payroll in this town.
- I do it so my dad doesn’t have to work.
- Anybody can be bought.
- I rent out space. Anybody can be bought. $50K a year. Cash…to hold onto a thing
- Once you are in…you can’t leave.
- Bucho is a kisser.
- Meanwhile at the Bookstore/Hospital.
- you been boot spurred my lover.
- Steamy Sexy Sex Scene.
- Meanwhile across town there are cigar smooches and ride ’em cowgirls
- It’s a bookstore…burn it down.
- Cool coming to get you stalker scene with Selma whisper singing.
- Bandaros O face he has while holding before shooting.
- Carolina’s bookstore is no more.
- Bandaros Dual Wield
- Love the stunt work in this movie. So unrealistic…but so much fun.
- That is not Bucho…He’s going to kill me…kill him already.
- You drive around town. You see someone you don’t know…you shoot them…it’s that easy.
- Look who are those guys…I’ve never seen them either…how hard is that. You think you can handle that?
- Take my car, that’s what I bought it for.
- He is a great Motivational Gun Speaker.
- It is easier to pull the trigger than play the guitar…easier to destroy than create.
- I hid the money in the books…that was a bad plan.
- Calling my friends. Campa and Quino.
- Campa…bring your guitars.
- I wasn’t always like this. Give me the strength to be what I was.
- How many guitarist in a Mariachi band?
- I can’t play this guitar…it is full of drugs.
- My guitar case is my gun..oh yeah…mine is a rocket launcher.
- Aww…little cuz died in a stupid way.
- My car!!
- Lock and load my guitar launcher.
- Oh no…they killed campa or quino…
- Oh shoot face.
- What…they killed the kid…you bastards.
- now Campo and Quino are both dead.
- my jeep! nooo
- All this killing has a cost…
- He is like Peter Parker…he had a chance to kill the killer and let him go.
- Manito…what are you doing here? I thought I was looking for the devil himself…my own brother!
- I don’t kill innocent people.
- Guitarrista…papa not proud…now you are just like me little brother.
- You have killed my men…now I kill your new woman.
- Everyone I killed was someone’s father….someone’s son…someone’s brother.
- Practice.
- Stick’em up Guns in my sleeves.
- Where to now that the revenge is all done.
- Did I thank you…. I will.
- I want you to thank me right now. Guns go bye bye. thank you. Just in case.
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