We’re not gonna make it? You are! Seagal Out!
Well Steven, here we are explosively decompressed at 35,000 feet without a parachute again. Now, based on my training the average human should have about 30 seconds of useful consciousness at this height. But, I’m way cooler than the average human…sooo…45 seconds….buuuuut I just wasted 15 seconds of that on a word-math problem or is it math-word problem? Whatever, we have been in worse situations…you are! now focus up Sha-gaul…….Shuh-gal…See-gal…….no it’s Suhgal right? I mean how have I been saying it?…Shuuuguuuh…Ahhh…snap out of it, Whoever you are!
Ya know what…I don’t need useful brains…I’ll just fly the brain…so hee-ya! take that fluffy cloud and that…and this roundhouse kick to your fluffy face. Oh wait…look clouds! Did that experimental bomber pilot just eject from our mission plane! oh ho ho… Hello plot hole here I come. All I have to do is skyfall towards him and take my position on his his lap for a free ride back down to earth.
“Hello fellow American! May I hitch a ride back to mother Russia!” I mean….ah shit..covers blown…quick fly to safety Sea-gull! Cah Cah Cah Cah
Executive Decision (1996) – Like 2 hours of intense zip lining, wire cutting, lights flashing action to get the attention of some while hiding from the attention of others. It’s sweaty work but Leguizamos got to do it.
- Man this movie is pixelated
- All Star Cast!
- Very Military Thriller Music.
- DZ-5 Russian Nerve Toxin
- Jim and John wrote this…twins? Predator. Wild Wild West
- Collins took one…he’s dead…for nothing! no DZ-5
- 3 months later
- Gee I wonder if Kurt is going to have to fly a larger plane later on. You are not prepared!
- Flying anxiety. Relax and Fly the Plane. Stick and Rudder
- What a weird side flash on the Jaffa Terrorist Wedding Napping.
- 15 years of unrestrained Terrorism.
- 6 months later.
- Movie planes ridiculously large on the inside
- Overhead luggage. Stupid Woman!
- Sweaty Terrorist are prone to blowing up and sweating
- Oceanic Airlines
- Gun Reassemble
- QA Has Bathroom Face Wash
- These Terrorist look like Terrorist
- I like calling the embassy and playing pre-recorded threats.
- Hide my gun in my sock.
- Circle that US Marshal…circle him!
- Where is the Passenger Manifest…You destroyed it?
- Sucking on Twizzlers and scrubbing audio.
- Remember Guys…this is a think tank….we get paid to think
- We do not negotiate with Terrorist…unless we do.
- Do we like London that much…enough to negotiate. Is the President in London?
- So we got this crazy plan. Let’s spend 20 minutes of the movie with some nut ass stunt to dock on a commercial jet with a stealth fighter and let’s let Seagal lead it and Kurt wear a tux and tag along.
- So Allison died from the Million Dollar Baby death
- This whole plan relies on a clip
- How many wind shears happen while doing some crazy ass maneuver
- Why is Cappy so damn heavy?
- OMG Seagal died in most spectacular fashion.
- I kind of like that Seagal held out for a better more heroic death
- Castle Rock. Big Eye Six. Hail Mary.
- Top 2 are dead in the team replaced with 2 non-supposed to be theres.
- Shh…double finger sssssh
- We only have part of our equipment
- Whispering in the belly of the plan…time for a heated power struggle
- Photo from 25 years ago…but I would recognize his voice…and know if I saw him.
- Co-Pilot saw Americans…Soldiers…ignore this cut and bump on my head.
- Yep. Still dead.
- I traveled all this way to lay on the cold floor with a broke neck. That’s why I get paid the big bucks.
- uh oh Velma…ya dropped your glasses
- What is the in flight movie? Looks like Kurt Russel and a Monkey.
- The Barefoot Executive (1971) Ha.
- They have enough nerve gas to wipe out half of the eastern seaboard….time to just blow up the plane.
- Scooting up and down the tube of a plane like some kind of Leguizamo Rat
- How nice of them to include the captain with the bomb research
- Why not just eject the bomb…lose pressure…
- All the tech guys in this movie have oral fixations.
- Whatever you do…don’t look into his eyes…his dreamy dreamy eyes…OMG I LOOKED INTO HIS EYES!
- I need me a laser wire cutter
- This operation has too many rookie factors
- Red Handled Dikes?
- Coughing Cappy Death
- Yaffa is Freeee…Free Yaffa for all!
- 1:22:22 .. It’s an executive decision now.
- 2-1 K…21 K!
- The bomb wiring is a decoy…what else is a decoy
- The under bomb has laser beams (Photo something beams)
- The president is out of the country
- This is more wire cutting than I had signed on for
- Least fun game of Operation every
- Also, way too many flashing lights in this movie.
- Haha…wardrobe change.
- Kurt Russel slowly morphs
- The look of surprise on the sleepers face…priceless
- Who Bye Box of Diamonds
- When is this morphine supposed to kick in.
- They are totally NOT in control
- Whats wrong..FLAPS!
- I love that Russel is announcing everything he is doing while trying to figure it out.
- Shit…landing gear down.
- Just fly the plane.
- Just land the plane
- Hey..my landing field!
- hey…thanks…a chewed up coffee stirrer.
R | | Action, Drama, Mystery | 21 June 1996 (USA)
Intro: Oh hey, You’re early…what’s that? Was I just upstairs taking a revenge poo in your toilet and now wiping my poo hands on your towel? C’mon Lee…I’m Daryl the bad ex-boyfriend and I am only here to do one thing… and that is to get railed to that wall in 3…2….1… ouch.
And now for a very important PSA….Hello Young Ladies, let me talk down to you for a minute. If you break up with a boy…get your keys back…Don’t let a revenge poo happen to you.
Twitter: Eraser (1996) – Time to pucker up, here comes some bad James C(aan)PR…mmm…Funyuns.
This is how you tie a boot
Fore Finger…middle finger
Time to burn the Birth Cert.
Blade in the belt buckle…will it be used!
Every time I see a doctor’s glove I think of prostate exam
This music is pretty awesome so far.
Nobody hits from us Johnny…
So the subtle Frank Sinatra in the background makes me think they are implying these guys are mafia connected…isn’t that right…Vinnie.
That is one big ninja
Shutup! Do it!
Those are some mighty light corpses. You ever tried to put up somebody? There is a reason they call it dead weight.
Right…Those son’s of bitches.
Why wouldn’t it work without an audience? This isn’t filmsack…you don’t need an audience to your house blowing up.
Apparently you only get erased once. That’s company policy.
I didn’t ask you which one was fake…I asked you which one was real…jack ass.
Just going to drag these photos from the “used to been” to the “is now” screen.
A bonified good person.
Stupid corrupt Cyrez corporation
This is how I image Redbox functions on the inside.
Do I have time to make another copy? sure…why not.
Boss blows his brains out in front of you. Cheap trick.
Man…Arnold is so sanctimonious in this movie.
This disc is blushing.
What do you think your Dell from 1996 is going to be able to do to decrypt your redbox disc.
Damnit Daryl…You just let yourself into my house when I’m not here…did you take a shit and shower in my bathroom? see Daryl…this is why we broke up…no boundaries.
ahh man…I was just about to pull the trigger…then a car pulled up…I guess I better wait…ooh balloons!
This rail gun is the balls!
Am I playing Quake right now? Pew Pew Pew…Rocket Jump!
Ha! The household refrigerator…protector of the innocent.
Drill bit gernade! My favorite thing.
Analog thermostat and a ripped gas line out of the wall..that is going to work. Eventually…
Hey Daryl…”Stick Around” – I couldn’t resit.
Reporters always make it worser.
Undersecretary…what is an under…secretary.
Have you ever tried to break a disc…it’s impossible.
Don’t burn plastic…the ozone is crying
This is turning into The Equalizer…I don’t want any payment…I want your loyalty…
This movie is offensive to women. Actually, it’s offensive to human beings. This credit card is for emergencies only…it’s not a license to shop…cause I know you women like that.
Orphans? that’s a restaurant? Orphans?
I make this cup of coffee look small…do you guys have a smaller cup?
Are these chumps with you?
Shiff and I’m Calderone..
Peeled her like and onion. mmmm…
A weapon for every orifice.
Allison is inside making muffins. (women are puny)
That is not how CPR works Caan….CAAAAANNNN…
What a world what a world what a world….kissed to death by James Caan.
1996…this is early on cheap bottled water.
No John…don’t beep her…that is exactly what they want.
You do not want to throw a chair into the engine of the jet you are riding in.
Oops…threw my parachute…guess I better go get it.
Well that was easy enough.
oh man..did that hurt? That had to hurt…I saw it.
Is that how backup chutes work?
Nothing worse than your mentor betraying you. He knows all of your tricks.
Arnold did not get to drive even one nice car in this movie.
Somebody got to beat up those teenagers with the zoo animal harassment sticks.
What kind of Secret Handshake ends with you shooting me in the leg!
You expect me to believe there is a Black Guy Named Bob Who Owns A Tow Truck and Junk Yard in Upstate New York? Is that the story you are weaving?
Alligators…am I right! That was one cool ass scene…never happen…but…shit…that was good graphics for 96
You’re Luggage! That wins the movie…I can turn it off now. Done.
No gay bar has ever been this gay.
Where did you get this cheap knock off shit…Ultra Seltzer? Did you pick these up in Utah?
Movie security guards are only confounded by Pizza Deliveries and Janitoring.
Defibbing is a fun party game.
Electronic door locks are easily bypassed by shooting them.
It’s a unix system!
The human gernade. It’s really the worst way to go.
Quick! To the roof! I have a helicopter there…we will fly away!
Tony Two Toes! Oddly…he got 3 toes. But Three toes is just stupid
That rail gun is sweat! Man I want to play me some FPS games.
Did he just Rambo up out of the floor? Yep… Two guns!
Typical Russian Mafia.
Typical Italian Mafia…the lesser of the 2 evils.
Damsel in distress…check.
I was literally yelling at the screen by the end of this movie..this movie has great timing and music…made my butthole pucker.
Damnit John…you dropped a crate on me. I should be dead.
Hello…? Ohhhh…we are on the train tracks!!!
Won’t someone please think about the train engineer. Stop using trains to exact your revenge. It’s inefficient.
Going downtown…gonna blow you all away