Knightriders (1981) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

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Oh hi,

This week on Filmsack, it is on a Steel Horse that we RIDERS into the KNIGHT of a by-gone era when people still went outside and men were men and men were naked far too often for this viewers taste. But I digest, because this 1981 film is as weird … as Ed Harris’ ass…  is white … as it takes us on a journey of Action/Adventure and motorcycle jumps…. like some kind of Medieval Knievel trying to prove it is no sellout by keeping it real! Now Beat it kid… you bother me… I’ll bring a sword to your school later… smart!  

Anywho and Meanwhile in another universe, on a very special episode of B.J. and the Bear, BJ and his best friend Bear must deal with the aftermath of absolutely decimating a mentally ill biker dressed as a knight who veers into their lane and tastes the full power of their red and white Kenworth K-100 Aerodyn semi truck, leading the unlikely duo on a cross country hunt and a search for answers from a fleeing Black Crow biker who witnessed it all. Truck beats Bike…. every time. 

Randy, I’d rather boff boys. Wait, what is boff. I assume it is a medieval jousting term. no?

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BRIEF

Knightriders (1981) follows a motorcycle club that transforms itself into a band of modern knights. Led by a charismatic outlaw with a taste for medieval lore, the club rides not just for freedom but for honor. Amid high-speed races, daring stunts, and raw rebellion, the film explores themes of identity, loyalty, and the clash between ancient ideals and modern life. With its unique blend of biker grit and chivalric fantasy, Knightriders remains a cult classic that defies conventional genre boundaries.

Rated: R
1981 ‧ Action/Adventure ‧ 2h 26m

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Knightriders (1981) – Not a movie about multiple Hasselhoffs? #Disappointed 

SHOW NOTES

• • • • Knightriders is not about multiple Hasselfhoffs
      • The one eye’d crow is blind after seeing the naked forest naughties of Ed Harris and his lover.
      • Now I must whip the stank off of my back.
      • haha… if you did not know what you were in for… 3 minutes of “this must be ye olden times…” then right to the motorcycle
      • Welcome to the leather faire.
      • It has to snap easy… we don’t want anyone to get killed out there.
      • Tom Savini out here doing his best Middle Age Gallagher.
      • Savini taking his role playing a little too seriously.
      • Billy and Lynn are somewhere down the river.
      • Another 75 cents please.
      • Fat Slob Jerk… Bingo.
      • Mr. Nice Guy. Fall out bikes… it is what I do.
      • She is so 50s… with her pink. Oh Daddy… you are such a jerk.
      • The name is Julie.
      • Just a couple of modern day knight on their mechanical horses.
      • Fight or Yield
      • The Sheriff. So we are doing the robin hood.
      • We are talking about serious hassles here.
      • This is what we did before the internet.
      • When honor was the true king.
      • I didn’t expect a Stephen King cameo… but I will take it.
      • Trumpets… Do do da do.
      • and now… the stunts…  before we have the tiny guy hand out the big cards.
      • I am the bike pusher over-er… in case it heads to the audience.
      • They got the blood bags… like wrestlers on TV.
      • Far Out… it is a lady!
      • Morgan the Black Knight… in the case of the tie… Morgan gets to choose the unproven Mace hand weapon.
      • Billy wants to see some blood.
      • The good doctor is in on it… They are out for blood.
      • Billy… your shoulder… you fool..
      • Let’s assume the former in this case.
      • Morgan… the boy who would be king.
      • The king has been rescued… get a stretcher.
      • oh chit… he spoked him.
      • Basics… you forgot your basics.
      • Its all fake
      • Merlin the Bus Doctor.
      • We don’t want no hassle man.
      • Do something bad to your basics
      • I had that dream again. That same black bird.
      • Magic got to do with the soul. The body ain’t shit.
      • Dr. Skat… You know how it goes… I know he ain’t harmonica’ing with blood all over his hands.
      • Merlin. the king’s son done killed him.
      • Watch out for Black birds.
      • Here… lady luck is a something a guy gave her… her dad.. it is bad luck… should have given him my head scarf.
      • Ewin the invincible. 
      • Now it is time for the goons to come play.
      • I guess little john’s mace is too heavy.
      • Cycle Riders… sign my magazine guy… no… I got beliefs kid… beat it.
      • It looks like the Nazis have come to ruin the day… with wheelies. Typical Nazi shit.
      • You got to have guts to do what we di… that is basics 1.
      • You better not monkey with me sing-a-long
      • Made a conscience adult decision to be here. Christ… we got an overhead.
      • I’m not trying to be a hero… I’m fighting the Dragon!
      • Savini made it uncomfortable.
      • Angie really wants to know if you are gay. This fireside conversation…
      • These cops really have nothing better to do.
      • You got a warrant? yeah… my sidearm.
      • Tuck the Trucker. Come on Julie… be less nake.
      • You gonna arrest me…  or do I have to do something.
      • You wanted to be a witness.
      • Are you in trouble Julie…  since when you messing around with them damnable machines.
      • I don’t know what I am… remember…
      • Talk to me… but not about that! Don’t be mean.
      • I’d rather boff boys.
      • Oh my gawd… there is Steve!! 
      • Nothing’s wrong.. Billy is in Jail. Steve the lawyer.
      • Some day I am going to ride in here and wipe you  out… HOLD ME BACK!
      • Mom been punched.. cause of Julie. Mom’s crying in the kitchen.
      • Everything is unfair.
      • You wanted the bakersfield jail… you got it baby.
      • I told them to wait!!
      • Joe… it means good time in Italian.
      • Better known as the Funky Friar.
      • Billy is the star? Right? He ain’t no Medieval Knievel
      • The circus has come to town.
      • The Best lawyer on 2 wheels. Steve.
      • You got any edibles on board.
      • Skat-man the doctor.
      • The big circuit… we are not an act… neither is bull roping.
      • Damnit Steve… we ain’t selling out.
      • It is tough to live by the code. People try it and they get tired of it… like diet… exercise… god. 
      • Damnit Merlin the Hamonica player… this fireside chat is serious.
      • Ideals take a backseat to survival… take the money…
      • Silver Bullet productions.
      • The troupe is our code. There aren’t two fights.
      • What is going on? Billy is using your bike.
      • Naked Pizza Party with the Friar.
      • They let the townies ride… 
      • If you don’t believe in it… get out.
      • You can not have a council meeting without everybody being here. No council meeting!! 
      • We’re already gone man.
      • The vultures are gathering.
      • You know how talent feels about agents.
      • I gave up on fantasies a long time ago… and then you pulled me back in. Your dumbass dream rubbed off on me… now you quitting on me… you ain’t quitting.
      • 2 years on this crazy journey… it was about you Billy… now… not so much.
      • And now is the time for us to cut to the event.
      • I handle small groups only. Now brother are you happy. Marl… your real name Marl.
      • The band is splitting up and the locals are crashing our party… bunch of posers… not just anybody can do this.
      • I got to love myself… everybody else thinks I’m a bastard.
      • You got to be true to yourself man.
      • Until it all spirals into violence.
      • Trumpets!!
      • I think somebody has a crush…
      • Ed Harris Butt Shot… playing that rock and roll music… we need period appropriate music.
      • The queen is crying… 
      • Well it finally happened… They killed a baby momma.
      • The knights always have to fight the locals bikers and give them the what for.
      • He finally found someone.
      • It is the Black Bird… he is here for the king.
      • You dare… boo the king.
      • Yield. I don’t want to hurt you anymore.
      • The fight field is full of downed bikes… dangerous.
      • Time to take our shirts off and flex our cheering muscles.
      • Real blood on this sword. I yield.
      • I just need to take a ride… you know what I mean… like away from you guys.
      • What are his wounds exactly.
      • Bunch of dopers…
      • Everybody hates everybody… 
      • Tom Sexy Savini.
      • Another Morgan.
      • These modern problems are creeping in. How the turn tables have turned with the power dynamics. Morgan you are the bitch now.
      • Oh man… get that acoustic guitar action… this guy gets it..
      • We are staying here… for the stray sheep.
      • Brando is anti -anti – anti -hero… uh oh… you said Brando… now we have to suffer 20 minutes of Brando impressions.
      • Oh no. He is dumping her back off at home. Sorry kid. I was a fool to think we could just ride off into the sunset. Nose flick. Oh fuck… daddy’s home.
      • These people are shit in the modern world… they need Billy and his dreamer ways.
      • Lets get the band back together.
      • There can only be one king Morgan. One king/one time. That’s the law.
      • Que the trumpets and the bad cosplay on motor bikes.
      • I am confused about the Native American.
      • What.. you guys came back?
      • You guys are definitely in a cult.
      • Morgan has agreed to fight.
      • Now lets just talk like this.
      • The Sparkle Knights on Bikes vs the Delusional Foam Armor Warriors.
      • Stop chasing me with your joust stick. we still friends? Yep.
      • King for a season.
      • Suicide run.
      • It is all fun and games until somebody gets a mace to the face.
      • All fun and games until somebody impales themsselves.
      • Merlin’s face says… it is time.
      • Check back with me. I’ll play it for you later.
      • It is time. King Savini! Oh come on… you ain’t  crying are you? King’s don’t cry.
      • Morgan the great!!
      • Where is my queen.
      • You know those contracts… Burn ’em baby.
      • Billy’s job here is done. and little crow’s feet. He follows.
      • He has unfinished business with a fat cop…
      • Throwing a gun in a fryer… that is a terrible idea. Pay the lady in studded leather adornment.
      • I got some unfinished business to attend. Beat up a cop. Make a kid happy by giving him a weapon at school!
      • Drinking from the water hose of life
      • Ride till I die…. literally.
      • I finally finished that song Billy.

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