Oh hi, Mr Olympia Lost and Found, how may we pump you up today. Ha ha ha. Just a little levity sir. Yes, I totally understand. You’ve lost your shirt and that’s no joke.
Ok so, can you describe the shirt for me. It’s red. Right, well we have a lot of red shirts sir. Can you tell me what size it is.A large but it wears like a youth small o10+our hulking body. Oh…and white trim. Ok, well that does narrows it down. So can you tell me does it have any ironically cute pictures on it. Like an owl or a cartoon dog?
(mixed with nervous laughter) Oh, it does. uh huh It has Mickey Mouse on it. uh huh…Say…where are you calling from? The Lobby, oh ok. ok. What’s that. You say you can see me. oh…oh…Oh yes, I see you waving now. My you are one large shirtless man…..really kind of hard to miss. What’s that? The shirt I’m wearing. oh…yeah…uh…it is red…with white trim and has Mickey Mouse on it.
Hold please. (running.)
Pumping Iron (1977) – Like watching a guy getting his knees licked by a Cheetah, what am I looking at right now? Is this porn? I hate my eyes.
Tiny lady show me how to be object of desire
Have you seen my muscles?
You see this Gold’s Gym sign? We punched that into existence.
Big Mike…how do you get that nickname among a lot of big guys? Big Tony. I noticed we never met small Mike or Tony…that’s because the big guys ate them.
This gym would intimidate me.
I see a lot of guys with hemorrhoids
28 6foot2 …. Mr Olympia…
I’m a muscle artist. Let me paints some deltoids over here with some 60 pound weights.
The Pump….blood into muscles.
Look where you point.
Never hide away…Little guys like to hide away.
Is it a requirement to have bad hair . Just shave your head and moustache …if you remove all of your body hair might as well buy all in. Leaving a bunch of hair on top of your head makes you look like some weird oily Troll doll.
You got rusty fenders. Jew. Catholic. 4 eyes. This guy had some weird bullying.
Anyone seen my muscle shirt? what’s that? all the shirts here are muscle shirts. Mine is a tiny little shirt too small for my body. Have you seen a shirt like that?
Mike Katz has some advice about kicking dogs: It’s like a dog. You can kick a dog so long and it will do two things. It’s gonna either roll over and die or it’s gonna bite you and attack you. And I’m the kind of person who is the type of a dog who would bite back…now where is my shirt! woof woof woof woof.
What’s it sound like when a room full of body builders clap. no one knows.
They have a Tall Man category?
No one is buying Mike Katz performance of appreciating Ken Waller’s win.
The 70s was a very hairy time.
Everyone involved looks like are on the set of a porno.
Arnold is impressed by dictators who are remembered for hundreds of years.
Lou eats a big salad
Lou would spend all night reading Muscle Books. what the hell was there to read in Muscle books..
Lou’s dad is after the big baby.
Body builders seem to be obsessed with analogies.
Fat Steven Wright is doing his best.
How would you like to be in a gym with a body builder who is hard of hearing?
Arnold is not a number.
Arnold is in a nice gym. Lou is in someones weight trailer.
Arnold at the gym…making everyone feel inadequate.
Is there a term for when weights start giggling and chiming.
Arnold has no fear of fainting in a gym. That is like my biggest fear in a gym
Arnold plays head games.
Like a cheetah liking your knees. It’s good
Arnold giving prankster advice.
Arnold is a dedicated prankster. Will spend 2 hours to screw you over.
Lou could not be more embarrassed of his parents in front of his idle than any child in the history of the universe.
Lou’s dad is the truth of living vicariously.
Third place in a 3 man contest. That is last my friend.
The saddest part of the whole contest. Watching Lou’s dad de-oil him.