Star Trek III The Search For Spock

Star Trek III: The Search For Spock (1984) (105 minutes – Rated: PG)

a 1984 American science fiction film released by Paramount Pictures. The film is the third feature film of the Star Trek science fiction franchise and is the center of a three-film story arc that begins with Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and concludes with Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. After the death of Spock (Leonard Nimoy) the crew of the USS Enterprise returns to Earth. When James T. Kirk (William Shatner) learns that Spock’s spirit, or katra, is held in the mind of Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy (DeForest Kelley), Kirk and company steal the Enterprise to return Spock’s body to his home planet. The crew must also contend with hostile Klingons, led by Kruge (Christopher Lloyd), bent on stealing the secrets of a powerful terraforming device.

Opener:

Twitter:  Star Trek III: The Search For Spock

http://www.imdbe.com/title/tt0088170/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Trek_III:_The_Search_for_Spock

 

Stuff I Loved:

The Search for spork.

Memories look like blue and sounds like vox

his was the mo….st….human (The shatner choke up)

This is the same voice effect they used in the new Star Trek movie when spock was explaining red matter.

We apparently shot Spocks space coffin into some kind of ewok moon

Spock carcass…out of sight out of mind. Polluting the universe with dead vulcans.

James Horner composed some rocking mood music.

Deforest-ation Kelley….

When you do something as bold as put your plot in the title of your film… it becomes misdirection spock for 30 minutes until we reveal the true way spock returns. “Has Spock returned? Not yet….wait for it.”

Look at those pointy side burns Admiral Kirk.. Rocking.

How casual is Admiral Kirk in his open breast uniform. Would somebody button up that flap already.

We must have some sort of neck wear fetish in the future. Everybody’s neck’s have those paper decorations frills they put on turkey legs that look like tiny chef’s hats.

Uhuru is like….what the hell did that brother just ask the admiral. Mutha…do not be talking to the captain on the bridge…are you stupid.

I don’t think the federation has

Valkris is showing some major cleavage in this movie. I see how Valkris was able to infiltrate the dirty old man contingent. Can I get a Scott fletcher boobies? Valkris I freely give you my information. Also, my creepy white-haired cohort would like to see your left boob. He has a very specific fetish. Also, we we have no razors on this cargo ship and no protection from these really sweet solar tans.

1.21 gigawatts of Klingon.

I like to keep my mostly immobile slimy Klingon pit bull next to my captain’s chair. In case I get the urge to pet something slimey.

Wonder if the was doc brown’s doc “einstein (inie)” after a failed travel back in time.

I don’t know what these Klingons are saying…but I think it is something about making a mashup of data interspersed with pictures of captain kirk.

Little known fact. Those are Christopher Lloyd’s real eyebrows.

I wonder if they had to get that Klingon ship up to 88 mph to hit hyperspace

Why is our Klingon ship green.

She is suppose to have Transwarp drive.

“And if my grandmother had wheels she would be a wagon.”

Reba looked real surprised that the enterprise was returning.

“This is not pos-e-ble”

I want to comment on the security team’s uniforms outside of Spock’s quarters.

Is that the deathstar on the wall in Spock’s quarters?

Bones. You got some major cataracts

Extended shore leave for all…except you Scotty. more work for you.

What other Galactic controversies are there?

Genesis effect. Insert Phil Collins joke here.

Klingons…speaking English when nobody is looking

Geez man. It’s good to see the future holds no reservations about running a buzz word into the ground. Genesis Planet, Genesis Effect, Genesis Torpedo, Genesis Experiment

Tell the federation…Captain’s Spock’s Tube Located. It’s in his pants.

What kind of wind breaker body suit is Kirk wearing in his casual wear.

It’s SPOCK! No…it’s his dad.

The Needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few…or the one…Do you really need to expand on how few you are talking about.

Don’t be mind melding with me.

The Vulcan Way.

Slugs. Why did it have to be slugs.

Somebody is really shaking those trees on the Genesis planet.

Hey bar waitress. Can I get you a moist wipe. You seem to have some makeup on your face.

Look here yoda wannabe. Just take me to genesis on your ship.

Cactus and snow! Klingon dogs and cats…living together. Mass Hysteria.

Federation Funny Farm…is that appropriate

Lexar.

Trope. Sleepy security guard.

The McCoy escape was very Star Wars.

“Up your shaft.”…Scotty quote.

Hind End of space. What are you, 5?

What do they keep in the Transporter Room closet?

Can anyone read that caution sign on the transporter in the space dock.

Dear lord, Does everybody have a collar or neck fetish in this movie? Look at the collar on Kird…or little boy blue collar Checkov is wearing.

How fast is 1 quarter impulse power…that seems kind of fast for inside a space dock.

What kind of staff or wand is the Captain of the Excelsior holding?

Klingon’s…choke or be choked.

Slackjaw’ed kid spock.

Every 7 years Vulcan males get all goofy.

Did she just have sex with 14 year old spock?

Scotty always has an excuse. “I wasn’t planning on taking us into battle.” Blah blah blah

Spock-formation is very manimal.

Oh sure…get off the planet. We’ll just beam up to the enterpr—- oh yeah. I screwed that pooch already.

I don’t need to see all this rockslide crap. Too soon.

What color of purple is Kirk wearing.

You have no idea how many times I have wanted to Klingon Choke someone.

Where is a Klingon’scroat   Christopher Lloyd took it right to the junk and hardly flinched.

Kirk was more choked up by Spock’s death than his own son.

Are they going to put Spock in a Wok? Where is Wynona rider.

I would not want old lady fingers that close to my nose.

2 hairs styles on Vulcan for men. Bald or Bowl. It’s the only 2 logical choices.

.screw the enterpise and Kirks’ son..as long as Spock is on the road to recovery. We are good for a happy ending..

 

Death Race 2000

Death Race 2000 (1975)  80 min Rated R

Death Race 2000 is a 1975 cult action film directed by Paul Bartel, and starring David Carradine, Simone Griffeth and Sylvester Stallone. The film takes place in a dystopian American society in the year 2000, where the murderous Transcontinental Road Race has become a form of national entertainment. The screenplay is based on the short story The Racer by Ib Melchior.[3]

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0072856/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_Race_2000

Opener: Does this super gimp costume make me look fast? Super gimpy…yeah.

Oh! It’s murder race day. What am I going to wear!? Let’s see…My Ernhart shirt? Hmmm…not sure if he exists in this timeline. How about my Speed Racer shirt? Nah…too french…and we hate the french…or is that japan…the scarf always throws me off…oui oui little monkey…..No wait…I got it…my gimp suit…oh and this cape…SUPER GIMPY! Just need to zip this up…….HOLY BALLS! MY NIPPLE! Holy Nipples My balls!!

Twitter: Death Race 2000 – Like running over the racing pope in your suped up corvette wearing a gimp suit. Wait…it was nothing like that. Creamed and reamed.

Stuff I Loved:

Race pope!

Know what we need. A really real closeup of a marching band.

Beautiful mat painting of the future!!

Great American Multitude.

20th Annual

5 bravest of men and woman.

3 days for American Champion.

Transcontinental Road Race

Alright, Alright. Bruce Buddy Buddy.

Her friends and lovers.

I dream of Jeannie!

There is no cause for alarm. State of Suspended animation.Ewwww…Frankenstein!

How is Mr. President.

It’s good to see the Nazis come back en vogue in the future

Buzz Bomb has a little bit more juice  this year.

Not a lot of fans of Nero

Who was Joe shooting at? Creamed and reamed.

T-Video satellite.

The AntiHero – Frankenstein, Mobsters, Nero, Nazi and Sex pots?

I spit on your car

The president is broadcasting from a smokehouse.

Minority privileged?

TV…the only network.

Mr. President is in Moscow.

The world crash of 79.

Mat Painting for the future

Did she bedazzle that helmet herself?

Howard Cosell  to Junior Bruce

If you win a race you become top dog.

No…they did not speed up the film during the race.

Mr. P loves you…GIVE HER THE D!

Alright alright…and hey hey hey… – Junior Bruce

Don’t you know about my face.

What…are we out a crazy straws?

It’s worse than I thought! You look like David Carradine!

What morons work on the road on transcontinental death race day?

Retard the spark 3 degrees

Not a lot of wind blowing on the outside of a racecar

How fast you move determines how long you live? I would think sitting in a tank would be more effective.

You would think you would get more points for more able bodied people.

A beautiful kill. A neat kill.

We are just going to roll out these old people from the geriatrics ward.

Best ever run over scene..stupid nurses.

What were they feeding that baby!

Start the Jam!!

Future race car Siri…has no information

Dumbasses. Got on the wrong side of the barracade

Get off the rope!!

I got a big ole knife on the front of my car…

and is a spitshine the only kind of car wax of the future? Loogie!

Everybody gets a body builder masseuse except for that one lady. She gets scrawny guy.

Frankenstein…Gimp Suit With A Cape. A good friend of mine.

Your fan club loves you…and we also belong to an astrology group…just saying

Carradine is sporting the skimpy gimp. Everybody will be wearing it.

Is he suggesting the Swiss doctors replace his junk?

Oops, dropped my glove.

Chrysler! Ran over the deacon.

You can’t score religious personalities

Joe…you’re salivating.

Hope that was some high speed film…splat the girl.

Chicken in a basket….chicken in a casket

That’s the oldest prison gang biker I ever done saw.

Oh shit! They closed the hole on him.

Who got the last laugh now.

Who gives a GD shit.

I did it….I’m no smuck!

All I got to do is run through a cyclone fence.

Hey look…it’s another gimp…and he’s waving…he’s like a friendly gimp.

Stupid french. ruining everything…including the phone system.

Does your death race insurance cover the navigator driving the car? I think not. DEATH!

We get a bulldozer and we trim this edge…Shutup!

Pictures of you all over the outhouse.

Hey…here is a plan. Don’t run straight…it’s pretty easy to avoid a car…holy hell…ass blood.

Haaa…They ordered an Acme hole in the wall and put up a detour sign. Totally Wile E Coyote’d the Nazis.

Me? oh nothing pa…I’m just pushing a tire in my overalls and silk shirt.

If the compound is in Japan….ooooh..

Who do you work for?

Replacement Goon Gimp.

What is wrong with Roger?

Joe is a bit of a food slob.

That dude has a lot of pens. The future FBI has a lot of pens.

I told you to stop playing that song!

Clam sauce is nasty.

Super Gimp!

The damn French. So typical. Stinking european allies.

Come on Franky…use some Kung Fu

70s fighting music is the worst…the fighting ain’t much better.

also, 70s love making music ain’t much better.

Native American Know How?

That funny man from Chicago. Ran over his own pit crew.

Calamity Jane always knew the 3 point turn would be the death of her.

hand gernade…get. it…it’s a hand…and it’s a gernade!!

hey, let’s stop for a lengthy moral discussion…we are only racing here.

I’ll just kill the president by running him over with my kill car…why didn’t I think of that!

No more death race…no more ruling abroad…restore free elections…Minority Privilege is revoked…wait…what?

Mr. & Mrs President Frankenstein.

Bad Ass

Bad Ass (2012)  90 min  Rated R

Bad Ass is a 2012 American action film written & directed by Craig Moss, the film stars Danny Trejo, Charles S. Dutton, and Ron Perlman.[1][2][3] It is loosely based on the viral AC Transit Bus fight internet video. A sequel is in the works, entitled Bad Asses.

A Vietnam veteran who becomes a local hero after saving a man from attackers on a city bus decides to take action when his best friend is murdered and the police show little interest in solving the crime.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bad_Ass_(film)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1928330/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Opener: Hey, I don’t know about you guys…but I had an interesting week. Usually I just watch my FilmSack assignments at home by myself. But I decided this time I would combine my new year’s resolution of spending more time with the elderly and watching more Trejo movies…. into one giant night….. of mistakes. On a totally unrelated note…can one of you guys come pick me up at the bus station?….. In Colorado.

Twitter: Bad Ass: Seriously, can you guys come pick me up. My backup plan of selling hotdogs at the bus station to get home has fallen through.  What, No I don’t want a viagra

Stuff I Loved:

Places I get my LA News. LANN. You Tube and the news paper, also, graphitti

Skin Heads on the bus!

Treo looked like a normal kid.

60 ACRES! You was land rich.

Football hero. Small town.  Wait…is Trejo the Spanish Superman?

Suddenly, Vietnam!

Also, Forrest Gump has forever ruined me taking the Vietnam war serious. Damn you Tom Hanks Everytime I see someone getting shot in Vietnam I think “Something jumped up and bit me on the butt.”

Geez man, how long was he in Vietnam. Time enough to get knocked up…twice

Do you take advatage of the GI Bill? Nope….suck it.

Your back up plan is a hotdog stand? Crap, that was my backup plan.

I do not need to see Trejo crying. No sir.

That lady’s hinnie was pretty sweet.

How come Skin Heads are always so happy in movies. Until they get their asses handed to them.

Do not kick my ass while I am sitting down.

hehe…the irony. “I don’t want to fight….but I wear a shirt that say, I’m a motherfucker on the back of it.” Also, baby blue is not your color.

“They called it a drive-along.” I call it keeping your eyes on the Treo.

This movie makes me want mexican food…and occasionally street dogs.

It’s going to be alright biscuit? His nickname is biscuit?

What happens when Bad Asses mom dies.

“Street Cleaning” that is your initiative? Street Cleaning?

Behind the green horse

This movie took a turn for the Blue

What! You are moving in with me? I thought you and your masterbasting son were just staying the night.

Biscuit don’t do no computer crap.

I am starting to see what killed dear old mom. Booze and Smokes.

These guys got a ton interesting names.

You brought fists to a gun fight?

Man Biscuit can’t get a break.

Don’t “Gonna do out best” arm slap me.

Bad Ass does it again.

Oh….Mr….Vega….I…AM…So…Sorry…about…how…slow…I….am…talking….

You have to be a Bad Ass to wear that fanny pack.

Official drink of the Cholo.

This TV is so old it only plays old 90s infommercials.

hehe…gold chain in the grass. Who could see that! Talk about your

Sherlock Trejo. Detective Trejo. Trejo-lobo.

“She’s friendly with the wife.” What a horrible term.

Also, can’t miss it. is a horrible navigation term.

hehe…I can’t spell all that bad language in my head

What about Trejo says “Talk to me like a sarcastic asshole so when I kick your ass no one will feel sorry for you..”

This is like an everyday man’s look at the world after the internet. Dropping names like Thumb Drives, YouTube and WikiLeaks, cell phones and emoticons. This movie was totally targeted for the 60+ crowd. Youth sucks.

Ron Perlman has the best voice

Just an old motherfucker looking for revenge. That sounds like a problem to me.

Everybody has a Vietnam nick name.

Then a bond reference for no reason

Things got real with that garbage disposal

Man. The mouth on that kid

Only another old fart can kick bad asses ass

Oh look. Gas rags on gas containers

You just knew it had to end with a game of chicken involving buses

Want me to tell you what night time phone footage uploaded to YouTube looks like. It looks like spotted dick.

Should have stayed at home with no door

Bad Ass the theme song

Haha….slow motion KO…glaaaargh

Ha! Somebody send an ambulance.

This is like a 60 year old’s wet dream

We had boobies in this movie.

The Man From Planet X

 The Man From Planet X is a 1951 science fiction film.  starring Robert Clarke, Margaret Field and William Schallert. It was directed by Edgar G. Ulmer.

A spaceship from a previously unknown planet lands in the Scottish moors, bringing an alien creature to earth near the observatory of Professor Elliot (Raymond Bond), just days before the planet will pass closest to the earth. When the professor and his friend, American reporter John Lawrence (Robert Clarke), discover the creature, they help it when it is in distress and try to communicate with it, but fail. They leave, and the alien follows them home. A colleague of the professor, the unscrupulous and ambitious scientist Dr. Mears (William Schallert), discovers how to communicate with the creature and tries to get from it by force the formula for the metal the spaceship is made of. He shuts off the alien’s breathing apparatus and leaves it for dead, telling the professor that communication was hopeless.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1549920/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_from_Planet_X

Opener: Ok. It’s been a while since I have starred in my own movie…so which one of these ladies gets to sleep with me? Ehhh…ehhh…what…that’s not a thing anymore…that makes me so mad….Gaaaaah…at least I get to star alongside Laurence Fishburne. What…Forrest Whitaker….seriously? I thought that was Laurence Fishburne…are you sure it’s not at least Samuel L. Jackson. Gaaaaah…that makes me so mad…. I want to punch windows instead of rolling them down before shooting. pew pew pew…get in the car….pew pew pew

 

Twitter: The Last Stand – A movie about an old flabby action star trying to stop the lead singer of Foo Fighters from crossing the mexican border…or something like that…I fell asleep after they shot the old guy on the tractor

Sommerton Junction

Stuff I Loved:

dave grohl look alike

Laurence Fishburne just needs to look up and see those zip lines and this would all be over

Orange track suits. Smart.

Hey hippie agent…get over here and tell us what kind of car this is.

Convenience factor

Cartel boy races in South America.

Helicopters are slower than supe’d up Corvettes. Unless they are….then they are…faster

Where is everybody going? Oh….the whole town is leaving.

Gee…I wonder if Mayor douchbag’s car is going to take a bad spill. yep.

Johnny Knoxville…yay…big gun!

Old Man Farmer. take the silver…or the lead.

No time to roll down the window….gaaaaaah….pew pew pew…get in the car….pew pew pew

Nooo…they killed the sweet kid cop!

Great squibs in this movie

Pretty sure if you mow down about 8 cops…they call in the military.

When does Arnold get to use some of his old lines.

Old people don’t give a shit

Welcome to Sommerton Junction…can we please name this town something cooler. I sound like an idiot

Drop the weapon (This one?)

Sweet. MMA fight on the bridge…Old vs. New

Event Horizon

Event Horizon (1997)  96 min  Rated R

Event Horizon is an American science fiction horror film released on August 15th 1997. The screenplay was written by Philip Eisner (with an uncredited rewrite by Andrew Kevin Walker) and directed by Paul W. S. Anderson. The film stars Laurence Fishburne and Sam Neill. It reached No. 1 at the box office in the UK.[2]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Event_Horizon_(film)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119081/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Opener:  I was just having the weirdest dream about dinosaurs and a very condescending Jeff Goldblum or as I like to call him Regular Goldblum….wait a second…was I naked when I entered stasis. What’s that?  No…No I don’t want any of your coffee…wait…did make coffee just to make a sex jokes?

Twitter: Event Horizon – Proving You can’t punch evil. You have to hit it really hard with a baseball bat and even then…results may vary. also, explosive decompression

 

Stuff I Loved:

Most communication between ship crew is done in rhyme.

Space computer printouts…boooda boooda booooda boop

Sam Neil. CLAIRE!!

Why the black man got to serve coffee….oooh…cause he wanted to make a sex joke.

Funky Space Man.

Layman’s terms….try harder

Sam Neil is always explaining stuff to the dummies. It’s his schtick.

Always passing crazy audio through some filters. Do you hear that?

Nasa has had audio file for almost a year…2 listens by ships crew. Bam…got it solved. Liberace me.

Bad stuff…bad stuff…bad stuff…we are here. Calm!

Lawrence Fishburne looks like a freak in that captains chair.  I would rather turn my seat rather my my neck.

“We have ice crystals everywhere.” Ice crystals of what?

Wonder if those flashing bombs will blow up?

Not to worry. The meat grinding tube is totally safe. It also opens and closes with spikey doors. Most dangerous designed ship ever.

How does a cd-rom get stuck.

Got some blood here…nooo..you have a butcher shop floor is what you have.

explosive decompression. I had that once. Got some Pepto and all was cool.

The gravity drive core has some pretty intricate design work on it.

Don’t touch the goo stupid

Space ship instrument panel explosions are the most common space injury.

Scrubbers are always bad. Always got to make the scrubbers.

Got to love a medical table with a drain on it.

Air Lock death in space movies

No Baby Bear…

Is it really a good idea to have the Inner Door/Outer Door buttons so close.

We’re leaving!! Did you see that crap…LEAVE!!

always watch where you are going

All the safety overrides they have do not work.

Fishburne is always a little bit behind. Run. Run. Nope…too late. Run!

Where we are going we won’t need eyes

Evil knows how to be evil. But not so good at ship management.

Man…tha/t Fishburn crawl to safety was awesome!!

Fishurne makes a lot of promises he can’t keep

Man this music is gooooood

This is the 90s Alien

You can’t stop any process that starts on this ship

You can’t punch evil. You have to hit it with a baseball bat and even then…results may vary.

The Rundown

The Rundown (2003)

The Rundown (also known as Welcome to the Jungle) is a 2003 American action comedy film starring The Rock and Seann William Scott about a bounty hunter who must head for Brazil to retrieve his employer’s renegade son. It was directed by Peter Berg. The film received positive reviews but failed at the box office.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0327850/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Rundown

Opener: Throw me the stifler…I throw you the whip

Hey honey…PACK YOUR BAGS! We are heading to Brazil! I know! It’s crazy…and your mom said I would never be able to find a job using my bachelors degree in whips. Kiss it mildred! South American here we come! Now let’s head to the bedroom and practice throw me the idol I’ll throw me the whip.

Wooooo

Twitter: The Rundown –  like being a  guest in another man’s house..don’t reach into his refrigerator without asking. Cause you might grab what the rock is cooking. Throw me the stifler…I throw you the whip.

 

Stuff I Loved:

porcini fat and earthy

Option A or Option B

Bad ass opening fight scene

The Rock is a great physical actor

Like working out 12 hours a day and getting your ass kicked with an aussie with a bean bag gun

is that sarcasm? you do it to your monkey friends. you don’t do it to me.

don’t take your guns to town

Stiffler!

gauto

No…I don’t like guns.

This movie lives on quick cuts

Hey…it’s that dude what is Christopher Walken and more cowbell

When I am a guest in another man’s house..I don’t reach into his refrigerator without asking. Unlike Randy.

When a rapper gets a shiny new tooth.

Their representation of hell is awesome!

We don’t call them Brazil Nuts. They are just nuts

        

so angry

oooohhh…goody…a short person joke. Run….for a long time

Stiffler uses the dreaded copy me annoyance.

Throw me the stifler…I will throw you the whip

at the bottom of that hill slide/fall I was really hoping the rock would land in stiflers crotch.

Little Thunder….a little lightening.

The Devil’s cat…you mean every cat?

Mention of The Tooth Fairy and Santa Clause

I find it amusing that walken successfully predicts the Rocks film…The tooth fairy

Santa Claus doesn’t give any breaks

this movie makes me feel out of shape

Firestick to the head

On The Run movies. The hunter becomes the hunted.

Tough guy gets beat up a lot.

Don’t pee in the water…it will swim up you ding dong.

Penis eating minnows

Flying fornification

Option B is always….I Make you

Have you seen stifler lately. He done got chubby

Ears Eyes Foot Face

Rock has Hypersenses

Double handed shotgun cocking…use your pits…use fruit stands…use whatever you can.

Ahhh…yeah…explosion walk away

What! Are you kidding me…you just doomed that small town to death…you busted down their watertower.

Wonder if they went to whip school? or just got a weekend training course with a certificate? What does that job app look like?

I tried counting how many times the rock got that spin around in the air thing. It was a lot

You got the moves…- Chistopher Walken

Slow motion cut scene. Bam.