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Strange Brew (1983) – Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi you hosers, Geez I just woke up, I don’t know about an intro. Just, take off you nobs,

You’re still here…. well, then let me tell you how to get free Filmsacks:

First, you bribe Scott at the front desk with a couple of Jelly’s. He has a whole drawer full. I’m not even sure he eats them. Just a whole drawer full of Jelly’s. Weird eh.

But THAT will get you in to see Randy.

Now Randy likes to hand out jobs. especially if you threaten to sue him. Currently, he has half of Canada at his employ. Handing out jobs like free beers at Oktoberfest.

Once you have a job, head down to our top secret lair where we keep Ibbott and his haunted  DVD disc changer. Just grab a DVD like Strange Brew. You doon’t worry about Ibbott. He’s usually in the toilet behind the fake wall taking care of “Ibbott business.” I think he gets into Scott’s Jelly drawer a good bit.

Where am I during all of this? Right here. Writing intros and drinking dad’s beer.

So sit back and get some corn. eh. It’s going to be a doosey.

LINKS

Strange Brew (1983)

Directed by Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas. With Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas, Max von Sydow, Paul Dooley. Canada’s most famous hosers, Bob and Doug McKenzie, get jobs at the Elsinore Brewery, only to learn that something is rotten with the state of it.

Strange Brew – Wikipedia

Strange Brew (also known as The Adventures of Bob & Doug McKenzie: Strange Brew ) is a 1983 Canadian comedy film starring the popular characters Bob and Doug McKenzie, portrayed by Dave Thomas and Rick Moranis, who also served as co-directors. Co-stars include Max von Sydow, Paul Dooley, Lynne Griffin and Angus MacInnes.

TWITTER

Strange Brew (1983) –  This movie is a genius, it knows the Atlas. Oh geez, my left nut.

SHOW NOTES

MGM Lion looks stoned. or bummed out.

Cranking a tail. was that a real tail! that seems super dangerous

Movie Theme is not as good as koo koo koo koo

The difference between tv and movies.

That is a lot of beer.

He’s a genius he knows the Atlas.

Russia and Hawaii doesn’t usually get the show.

Theory on movies. How to wreck a movie. Release the moths.

3 B …  sit back and get some corn. ok eh.

2051 AD Ten Years after WW4

He is the Keymaster.

Bowling alleys take it first after ww4

Mutants live in the underground caves.

Omega Man is an influence.

Like using a tape measure to communicate

Whiplash from my burps.

Breaking the 4th wall and then the 5th wall.

They did this on their album guy.

A mason jar of moths will wreck any movie.

The Mutants of 2051 AD was their movie inside a movie.

I cry like that when I spend 2 weeks allowance on a movie.

Police in Canada drive cabs.

This music is very 80s…groove machine…shred some guitar. clean drum rhythms.

Theme song song

Bob and Doug live with their parents.

Why are they in such a hurry to eat when they got home. Beer and donuts?

Is that Yosemite Sam? Their dad is Yosemite Sam? They stole all the WB sounds…no they are watching MGM cartoons. it’s an MGM movie.

You nob.

Look at that old 7-11

What kind of beer store is that? All we have are Grocery Stores and ABC Stores around here.

I believe there will be no charge.

Nice box art to reality shot.

Take off. Hoser.

“He hooked up our stereo.” That used to be a qualifier when we were in high school. Cred.

Is that guy’s security desk have a keyboard.

I need a hidden door bathroom. It’s very humorous..apparently.

Nothing bribes a chunky secretary faster than a pocket donut. no…I was wrong…2 and one is a jelly.

Ahh..the 80s…where set decoration go to be embarrassed.

Computer sounds. Deep press keyboards and bleeepy flashing computers and the hums of vacuum tubes.

“Let’s get some men on the bottling line.”

Go in to get some free beer. Get a job instead. What just happened. Leap of logic?

Bring the lunatics from the asylum…let’s see how the drugs, beer and synth music affect them. Apparently it makes them a hockey team. makes sense.

Haha…”The Colonel is dead but here we are enjoying his chicken.”

Apparently the McKenzie boys are a big joke around the neighborhood.

“Geez I just got up…I don’t know.”

How much beer, corn and donuts are these guys putting away in a day.

Bad guy is bad.

Galactic Border Patrol.

Question Relay Gag.

I wonder if this score will be related.

Take off eh.

Eh.

Brewmeister Smith. is that his real name or his title?

How strong is the bad guy? This strong. Slaps you around and can pick you up by the cheeks.

Level 5!

“Give in the dark side of the force you nob.”

Oww…my left nut.

Piano revelation music. Ting ting ting ting

They horked our clothes!

Blissful ignorance heroes. They just bumble into winning the day.

“They are cutting pirates” Illegal record making?

Used to be a common device. cutting the brakes.

Friendly zombies…that is what we used to think of lunatics.

Hosehead is the dogs name.

Do you feed/water your dog anything that is inappropriate?

Didn’t need to see dad’s face. That broke the myth.

“What the stink are they doing in there?”

Scary. Jason Vohrees on a moped with flowers.

Why am I being chased by a cab. you pull over eh.

The McKenzie brothers are like the Duke Boys.

Oh no. Not the McKenzie van! it’s part of their 80s identity.

When you are only 10 feet from the surface of the water do you need air shoved into your mouth to rise up? Sad music

The detective dub over was amazing.

Apparently he has no brakes either.

Intermission to signify the 2nd act?

We don’t need air. we got beer.

Man. I bet that was hard to film. Props  to the dedication to the gag. Pulled over underwater.

“My compliment to the many fine things in your home.”

“Ahh…my wife.”

Personalities so big…they take over the prison.

He is Tron. He lives in the game.

He knows how to handle the press. Beat the Nation.

Is that the queen over the judges head

Please explain TimeCode

Shove a couple of bullets up your nose.

The judge has magazines on his desk.

That is not how bullets work. But sure. I accept it.

Oh no! Our heroes have been committed.

I love doing the steamroller!

“Hi fellows. My name is Ted.”

That is one big needle…full of beer.

Hey you “6.50” all I got is two 5s

Power plays a weird role in this movie.

I think Ted is Dead. Dead Ted.

We have seen head crushing before…and it hurts.

Got to escape the asylum.

Cowboys on PJs and Spacemen on the other. That was all kids liked back in the early 80s

is that little car a Datsun? they say it is Japanese.

Now you are the mouse.

Is it hard to swim in beer? I wonder if it is hard to swim in carbonated anything?

Ahh…the old pee in the pool…it’s getting warmer in here joke.

Koo ko koo kooo

The superstrong bad guy…how do they get so superhuman strong?

A lot of electrocutions in this movie.

Those who have the power.

Music to accentuate comedy in a comedy. It’s hard to pull off these days.

True McKenzie style. He drank it all.

When your movie turns into Tron.

Did she lay a kiss on the manager?

Who is that security guard at the end. He’s familiar.

The Mckenzie’s are always landing jobs based on their weird skillsets. Yet they never have a job.

Skunk dog.

All the beer is free!!

A Toronto Skunk.

The McKenzie’s know how to interrupt.

Movie review of your movie in your movie.

Freeze Frame. Happy Trails

 

 

 

 

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Pumping Iron (1977) – Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Mr Olympia Lost and Found, how may we pump you up today. Ha ha ha. Just a little levity sir. Yes, I totally understand. You’ve lost your shirt and that’s no joke.

Ok so, can you describe the shirt for me. It’s red. Right, well we have a lot of red shirts sir. Can you tell me what size it is.A large but it wears like a youth small o10+our hulking body. Oh…and white trim. Ok, well that does narrows it down. So can you tell me does it have any ironically cute pictures on it. Like an owl or a cartoon dog?

(mixed with nervous laughter) Oh, it does. uh huh It has Mickey Mouse on it. uh huh…Say…where are you calling from? The Lobby, oh ok. ok. What’s that. You say you can see me. oh…oh…Oh yes, I see you waving now. My you are one large shirtless man…..really kind of hard to miss. What’s that? The shirt I’m wearing. oh…yeah…uh…it is red…with white trim and has Mickey Mouse on it.

Hold please. (running.)

 

LINKS

Pumping Iron (1977)

Directed by George Butler, Robert Fiore. With Arnold Schwarzenegger, Lou Ferrigno, Matty Ferrigno, Victoria Ferrigno. From Gold’s Gym in Venice Beach California to the showdown in Pretoria, amateur and professional bodybuilders prepare for the 1975 Mr. Olympia and Mr. Universe contests in this part-scripted, part-documentary film.

Pumping Iron – Wikipedia

Pumping Iron is a 1977 docudrama about the world of professional bodybuilding, with a focus on the 1975 IFBB Mr. Universe and 1975 Mr. Olympia competitions. Directed by George Butler and Robert Fiore, it is inspired by a book of the same name by Butler and Charles Gaines, and nominally centers on the competition between Arnold Schwarzenegger and one of his primary competitors for the title of Mr. Olympia, Lou Ferrigno.

 

 

 

TWITTER

Pumping Iron (1977) – Like watching a guy getting his knees licked by a Cheetah, what am I looking at right now? Is this porn? I hate my eyes.

SHOW NOTES

Tiny lady show me how to be object of desire

Have you seen my muscles?

Gym Muscles

You see this Gold’s Gym sign? We punched that into existence.

Big Mike…how do you get that nickname among a lot of big guys? Big Tony. I noticed we never met small Mike or Tony…that’s because the big guys ate them.

This gym would intimidate me.

I see a lot of guys with hemorrhoids

28 6foot2 …. Mr Olympia…

I’m a muscle artist. Let me paints some deltoids over here with some 60 pound weights.

The Pump….blood into muscles.

Look where you point.

Never hide away…Little guys like to hide away.

Is it a requirement to have bad hair . Just shave your head and moustache …if you remove all of your body hair might as well buy all in. Leaving a bunch of hair on top of your head makes you look like some weird oily Troll doll.

You got rusty fenders. Jew. Catholic. 4 eyes. This guy had some weird bullying.

Anyone seen my muscle shirt? what’s that? all the shirts here are muscle shirts. Mine is a tiny little shirt too small for my body. Have you seen a shirt like that?

Mike Katz has some advice about kicking dogs:  It’s like a dog. You can kick a dog so long and it will do two things. It’s gonna either roll over and die or it’s gonna bite you and attack you. And I’m the kind of person who is the type of a dog who would bite back…now where is my shirt! woof woof woof woof.

What’s it sound like when a room full of body builders clap. no one knows.

They have a Tall Man category?

No one is buying Mike Katz performance of appreciating Ken Waller’s win.

The 70s was a very hairy time.

Everyone involved looks like are on the set of a porno.

Arnold is impressed by dictators who are remembered for hundreds of years.

Lou eats a big salad

Lou would spend all night reading Muscle Books. what the hell was there to read in Muscle books..

Lou’s dad is after the big baby.

Body builders seem to be obsessed with analogies.

Fat Steven Wright is doing his best.

How would you like to be in a gym with a body builder who is hard of hearing?

Arnold is not a number.

Arnold is in a nice gym. Lou is in someones weight trailer.

Arnold at the gym…making everyone feel inadequate.

Is there a term for when weights start giggling and chiming.

Arnold has no fear of fainting in a gym. That is like my biggest fear in a gym

Arnold plays head games.

Like a cheetah liking your knees. It’s good

Arnold giving prankster advice.

Arnold is a dedicated prankster. Will spend 2 hours to screw you over.

Lou could not be more embarrassed of his parents in front of his idle than any child in the history of the universe.

Lou’s dad is the truth of living vicariously.

Third place in a 3 man contest. That is last my friend.

The saddest part of the whole contest. Watching Lou’s dad de-oil him.

 

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Matchstick Men (2003) – Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi Filmsack Men, Who shall we con today? The listeners? Little Old Ladies, Randy? Hmmm… .unsure if I meant Little Old Ladies THEN Randy or Randy likes to con little old ladies…. or perhaps Randy is just really into geriatrics.  Show note problems…am I right?

Well I hope you enjoyed that little distraction. Meanwhile, I swapped your Sacks of good intros with bad impressions of Nicholas Cage.  Good Luck, Randy.

oh look a little old lady.

LINKS

Matchstick Men (2003)

Directed by Ridley Scott. With Nicolas Cage, Alison Lohman, Sam Rockwell, Bruce Altman. A phobic con artist and his protégé are on the verge of pulling off a lucrative swindle when the former’s teenage daughter arrives unexpectedly.

Matchstick Men – Wikipedia

Matchstick Men is a 2003 American black comedy crime film directed by Ridley Scott, and based on Eric Garcia’s 2002 novel of the same name. The film stars Nicolas Cage, Sam Rockwell and Alison Lohman.

 

TWITTER

Matchstick Men (2003) – Like counting in Spanish until you take your pink English speaking pills. *Audible clicking noise

NOTES

One, Two…Three

These credits are giving me anxiety.

That is one serious overbite your dog has.

Love this music.

Compulsive behavior.

The big pink pill helps with the spanish compulsion. now he counts in English.

Random phone guy.

A scam!

Feel horrible for the lady. Great job. You made me feel.

Is he a vampire? He sure don’t like that sun. But thank god they let the dog out.

They left the door open!

A long con. I don’t do the long con.

Yeah…we all saw the pink pills going down the sink.

No pink pills….man…that kicks in fast.

Doctor skipped town.

“You looking for something Sucker?”

Sandwich crumbs will make anyone nervous.

Outdoors, Dirt, bugs.

Onto the blue pills.

“The answering machine pickup” We don’t have that anymore…but we should really bring that back.

never trust a psychiatrist with a Magic Eye poster on the office wall.

Can you call my ex wife?

What is the psychiatrist wearing? and a pipe?

Smoking in a car with the windows up. That seems like torture.

“Mom said I got your elbows”

Outdoors is no good

That is the creepiest way to kiss your “just met” 14 year old daughter ever.

unm. unm. noise

Obsessed with his carpet. Maybe you should get rid of the carpet.

NY Super Fudge Chunk.

Don’t touch my shit kid!

Kid Rock to strip to.

That’s a lot of cigarette and tuna

Those shopping carts though!

Do all con men smoke? am I seeing a motif? or theme?

Discussion Prompt: If all con men in the world smoke. What other fictional worlds could we apply this logic to and how would that change the story.

Mine is What if Samuel L. Jackson’s “Hate this hacker crap character” was conning Newman and he doesn’t actually hate this hacker crap.

 

That guy that never tips. You can’t con him

Teaching your daughter to con.

So much smoking in this movie

It’s the odd couple of con movies.

Who needs TV when you can watch tuna and water in the fridge?

Lady money count. Count faster!

This is one freaking emotional movie.

 

 

 

 

 

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Spawn (1997) – Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi and welcome to the Marines!

Semper Fi: Do or die!  However, if you do DIE. Be sure to go to straight to hell, do not pass go; do not collect 200 dollars, That’s a joke son, laugh cause you are going to hear a lot of those when you are dead. It’s a real yuck fest in the afterlife.

Anywho, While in hell be sure to make a deal with one of the devils down there. Personally,  I prefer the badly rendered ones.

Be sure keep an eye on the time. A 5 minute meeting in hell can turn into 5 years real quick. Cause, Hell?

When you get back, be prepared fight pun flinging clowns and bearded bad guys with pace makers the size of one of them Electric Lady Schick Razors.

Also, if you run across a kid that keeps calling you Mister. Go ahead and chop it’s head off. It’s a demon in disguise. “Hey mister, you ok? Hey mister, your face looks like a burnt turd. Hey mis…chop!”

LINKS

Spawn (1997)

Directed by Mark A.Z. Dippé. With John Leguizamo, Michael Jai White, Martin Sheen, Theresa Randle. An elite mercenary is killed, but comes back from Hell as a reluctant soldier of the Devil.

Spawn (film) – Wikipedia

Spawn is a 1997 American supernatural superhero horror film based on the comic book character of the same name. Directed and co-written by Mark A.Z. Dippé, the film stars Michael Jai White in the title role, and is the first film to feature an African American actor portraying a major comic book superhero.

 

TWITTER

Spawn (1997) – This movie hits you so hard and fast that it’s like being hit by a happy Algerian seeking missile to the face.

or

Like a military grade gun combined with a super soaker. It’s hard to tell if you are having fun when getting shot in the face. Nope.

NOTES

Release the Doves of hell

That escalated quickly. Peter ain’t gonna be too happy about burning down his gates.

I got a rocket on a tripod.

Splinter Cell’d

This the type of movie if you ain’t AIS  as soon as the movie starts you gonna be asking be me a bunch of questions.

Happy Algerian guy. Waver heat seeking missile

He is the watcher with the bad hat. Bad Hat Harry

and now is the time we dance.

this is some giant sized opening credits. or opening credits from hell.

This is going to be the “From Hell” joke episode

Tricia Takanawa (Family Guy) reporter

5 o’clock Martin. Sheen

writing P.S. is fine…saying P.S. is weird

Why ask why…when how is so much more fun.

Burn that cigarette Sheen…draw in heavy.

What did that

I’m drinking JAVA!

Spaz guards the house and Wanda.

Wait…was he drinking that coffee before he gave it to him. I don’t want your backwash coffee or your thermos coffee…people with coffee have no bounds.

Why did he glow green? was that a ghost fart?

mmm…kill zone was not clear.

She got a leg gun.

The only direction these actors got was…act like a dick…

Trope…just one more operation.

This is a “subversive” arm of the military.

playing them bongos. just the outside…around the rim and shaking these maracas.

I not only do my kill job. I look angry while doing it.

ahhh hell…that gun is a super soaker with Nickelodeon slime…which is super flammable.

That lady is disgusted by Al.

Hey, why you gonna blow up Al you already done burnt him up with flammable goo.

Straight to hell you go Al. You don’t even get to see the pearly gates.

HELL DOVES! coo coo coo.

Hell is a dirty back alley behind a catholic church? I suspected as much.

my beautiful face

The “Hey Mister” kid…I need more of that in my life.

“Hey mister, you don’t look so good.”  Thanks kid. “Hey mister, you smell like you shit your pants.” Thanks kid “Hey mister, are you as dumb as you are ugly.” Beat it kid.

A new spawn…a spawn of hell.

Fragmented memory. 5 years of change makes Spawn angry!

CHANGE MAKE SPAWN ANGRY AND EVEN MORE BURNT AND SMELLY!

That is a scary ass clown.

So what is the green glowy thing…what does that represent.

Spaz still loves me.

Is that kids name Cyan?

Crispy is clowns side kick. A Jiffy Pop Accident.

“Don’t want to keep that side of potato salad waiting.”

Dude…if that clown showed up to entertain my kids…I’d be like “nope.”

So many flash backs.

Don’t mind being short fat and ugly…but the pay sucks.

Clown farts green.

Nectoplasm? is that what they call it?

D-E-D dead

He yells Wanda as he goes to hell like Mortal Kombat.

He talks without moving his mouth. Weirdo CGI creature.

Spawn looks like a burnt up Slim Good Body.

This is one of those fast moving no stops movie.

I have never seen anyone hanging out and playing rock music during a storm in a cemetery. I’ve never seen that.

Why did Dead Al try to grab demon Spawn Al?

Scream like this…

Punch a dude. Develop super costume.

I didn’t know Road Side Dives was shooting at the cemetery. Thanks Guy Ferarararar

Spawn and the dead can die if you cut off their head.

Pizza maggots. I never seen maggots get a hold of pizza like that. Do they eat pizza?

Took Sheen 5 years to grow a beard and the assassin girl is still wearing the same thing (aidan priest). Oh wait…was that his 5 year plan…to grow a beard?

oh…burn wipe…

Cape burn wipe!

Is that lady in the green a power ranger?

Oh Priest bedazzled her costume

Priest should not be talking about others costumes

I wish I had a belt that could block crotch shots. best superpower ever.

Spawn still thinks he needs guns.

Who shoots at a guy climbing a wall…

Cape power of changing. That’s pretty cool.

That time spawn almost fell off the building.

Hope no one is looking out their window…gonna get shot in the face.

My cape is cool.

Do we really need a special effect sound for everything. That cape is noisy.

Did they really have to take her all the way to the ambulance before they figured out she was dead. Are they putting her on ice?

Could clown spit more. intentional or just a an awesome side effect of special effect appliances?

Spaz is like 90 in dog years.

I got to admit that Cheerleader scene with Clown was weird, hilarious and kind of rocking.

The big demon sounds like Claw from Inspector Gadget.

Oh c’mon…no way do you leave your dog there. That’s BS.

Shut up and eat your rotten sandwich.

This is gonna pinch.

Al, Zack and Spaz on a mission!

What dumb asses would insert a trigger for a bomb that would kill everyone.

I could eat worms. I could not eat mayo and worms.

“Curious Crispy”

Clown alternate ego is violator. Who looks 10 times cooler than hell demon?

That is one bad alley.

“You been violated girly man.” That is only a gag that would work for Hans and Franz fans.

Did the clown just sing D-I-C-K-I-N-G as the Kissing in a tree song.

Love me a computer who says out loud what it is doing. like “Downloading secure files.” SHHHHHH

Do ambulances come to back alleys?

Kinky. Chain up Spawn

Costume Trillions neuron extensions.

Well now that you have explained that I can do it…watch me do it…but I got to make grunty noises…even though it is all thought control.

Spawn has more to learn? I mean he like more than 2 minutes of training.

Spawn just sent that kid on a quest to find Spaz…dead or alive.

More rules. Spawn has to protect his powers…when they are depleted he dies.

They gave Clown more one liners than Beetle juice. Has any character ever had more one liners?

He only speaks in puns.

Spawn Cycle. He just spawn it.

Spawn is no good at cycles.

What kind of music is this.

Clown flying through the air…gotta cap that.

“Reading secure files.” The not so discreet Cortana.

Shoot the monitor logic. You shoot the monitor…you destroy the computer and all of it’s contents.

Getting a Roger Rabbit moment from the clown.

That kid didn’t even scream.

Are you a regular Einstein? what is a “regular” Einstein.

Now…cutscene to demon from hell laughing…sure…why not.

“I will rip your heart out…how specific.”

If Clown can look like Wanda. Maybe you should reconsider Clown as your friend.

“See you in Hell Jason.” What year was this? was that a setup. Was that the 5 year plan?

Wow…now that is cool…he can eye suck things out of people?

How big does a switch attached to your heart need to be? That would have killed him.

Getting a Mask vibe…what year was that?

Pretty much everything in hell looks like shit. Whoever shot these can go to hel…wait..

Get stabbed in the neck…explode…makes snse.

Army of Spawns.

Spawn is despawning the whole place.

“You will never escape me…unless you fly up the way you came in….nooooo!”

Spaz really does know where he lives.

Clown has more lives!

OFF WITH HIS HEAD

What is Clown made of?

So…this was the beginning. But it wasn’t…it was the end.

 

 

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The Manhattan Project (1986) – Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Yes Sir Mr. President, per your orders, we dropped that bomb on those filthy cold war Russians.  But I’m saddened to report sir… that we had some pretty unexpected results… Instead of dirty burnt radiated Ruskies it appears all we did was make their hair fuller and shinier. They couldn’t be happier when we flew back by. Where did you say we got that plutonium from? Ithaca?

or

Yes, Hello…is this Kremlin? This is top secret KGB agent reporting in. I have just returned from American nuclear facility in Ithaca. I have brought with me samples of American plutonium. I must say the mission was easier than we had imagined. Ronald Regan American’s are so over confident of their security that they left full sample on a table unguarded. However, if this sample represents the full force of the American’s might then we can sleep well comrade. Early tests have shown that their plutonium is not a very effective explosive. I feel so safe with this container that I slept with it under my pillow last night.  I was surprised to discover this morning that it had sprung a leak during my slumber. When I woke up I was sure that I would have radiation sickness. But instead my hair has never been fuller or shinier. and smell it….oh…this is a phone joke.

Yeah I know that’s not how that works. But this movie could be called “That’s not how any of this works…now get out of my glove box KidGyver.

LINKS

The Manhattan Project (1986)

Directed by Marshall Brickman. With John Lithgow, Christopher Collet, Richard Council, Robert Schenkkan. A teen and his girlfriend make an atomic bomb with plutonium stolen from a scientist dating his mother.

The Manhattan Project (film) – Wikipedia

The Manhattan Project is an American film, released in 1986. Named after the World War II-era program that constructed the first atomic bombs, the plot revolves around a gifted high school student who decides to construct an atomic bomb for a national science fair.

TWITTER

The Manhattan Project (1986) – Like having an exit sign on your bedroom door. I thought you were a genius.

or

Like asking what motion detectors are for. You know what they are for. you know. you know.

SHOW NOTES

Big ole thumb pushing buttons.

On has a smiley face

This is magnetic. Here is my spoon.

My job Push the button.

is it a good idea to hold you hand over that

Nickelodeon slime.

Truck transports in the middle of the night.

is that a DeLorean in the neighbors drive?

How smart is this kid if he needs an exit sign on his bedroom door

what kind of moron flattens a rounded scoop of Quick

Valium or heroin. that is a wide spectrum there kid

Roland is a dick. No one wants to be a Roland. Let’s blow him up

When did we stop making separate keys for glove boxes and ignitions…or doors for that matter.

Me, my books and my memories are moving in

Happy bike riding music.  Down a country road. You don’t see that much anymore

What are those? Motion Detectors. What do they Do?! Detect some kind of motion?

“Three Yellow Suits to loading please”

Is this some a Mountain Dew bottling facility?

I could use about 2 minutes less of watching robots load plutonium onto racks.

Watch me light my cigar with a laser. Oh GOD! I CUT OFF MY FINGER! Do lasers light stuff or burn holes through stuff.

Lithgow has far too much access to lasers.

What’s that? “Lubricating oil for the robut.”

Are we implying that radiation is creating 5 leaf clovers?

“Are you cold mom? Tough shit. I ain’t your monkey boy.”

This kid is a goofball. He gets his jollies from blowing the horn and digging through gloveboxes.

“Here kid…I got a really loud puzzle toy.” Spin and done.

Hey genius. You just blew my my frozen juice into my blender. that’s gross No way am I drinking that.

I have a TV on my shirt. it’s a TV on my shirt. Now I’m watching TV! I’m ironic!

Doctor Strangelove is in there hitting on my mother and watching my TAPES! MY FUCKING TAPES! TWO FOR THE ROAD also. The day the earth stood still.

So this kid is the GloveBox McGyver

That whole place is nothing but warning. Radiation. High Power. Do Not Enter. Do Not Touch.

KidGyver keeps some weird shit in his bag. One scrubbing glove his mother has been looking for for weeks.

For reals. Do you have any idea how much a bottle of VO5 is! I’ll kill ya.

First. Why the hell would you steal plutonium..in a plastic jar no less…and replace it with VO5. They are going to bomb Russian and all that is going to happen is some very clean smelling Ruskies. Is that offensive? You drop a Vidal Sassoon bomb on me.

What does it say about V05 when the color and consistency is that of Plutonium congealment

So he is going to duct tape nuclear material to his remote controlled Subaru? Sounds like a good plan

This is a really elaborate plan he came up with. A modern movie would have a planning montage to lay the heist out.

This has gone from cute little prank to “they are going to bury this kid under the federal prison after they shoot him.”

Where did that security guard find lug nuts…cause I never have extra lug nuts hanging around.

That married security guard is drooling over a high school girl.

I’ve seen more of the inside of glove boxes in this movie that all other movies combined. Makes me think I am not maximizing my glove box

Weee…let’s make a nuclear device!

I’m learning all this stuff…now I must circle this device in yellow highlighter!

Learning how to make a bomb montage.

C4 is surprisingly easy to acquire in movies

Did the VO5 got 99.998%? (update: nope. it was flat. Just like my hair after using VO5)

This is the most fun anyone has had making a mass murder device. Why is this music so happy at the weirdest times.

Son…why are all these cantaloupes cut up weird. are you experimenting…sexually? We got an American Pie situation in the kitchen but with cantaloupes.

These computer models say you are smart. Let’s plot it!

Just a little murderous mayhem is all

This is more nefarious than Flubber

haha…sexually abusing the hamsters…I wish!!

And my science project is GIANT BUBBLES! made from VO5 at the 45th annual science fair

Them nerds are into her. SHE LOOKED AWAY!

He left the bomb in the car. probably the glove box

If you only have 87 dollars to get to Ithaca. What would you do?

This move has more drug references than I would have suspected

Jenny…you save’ed us…I want to be your wife

No way would they let this kid go this far. He would have been dead already

Thing that grossed out Scott. Kissing after smoking or putting in an ear bud after taking it out of a sleeping guys ear on the bus.

The one black guy in this movie has to hand the white mom the phone. ANSWER YOUR PHONE BITCH

People used to never hang up pay phones

Don’t make me put my nuclear weapon together.

This is how nuclear war happens. Escalation

this is the worst Ithaca Standoff I have ever seen.

Shoot her!

The bomb turned on spontaneously. So a kid who made a home made nuclear bomb made a mistake. That’s an F

This plan has went from bad to worse.

The core got stuck half way in…hate it when that happens

damn cheap ass photo strobes

That is way more hairy dudes holding clippers within inches of one another for me. Grossed Scott out.

Mom has been trying to use her Boom Box all day…but she can’t find any D Batteries

How you gonna get rid of us all. Ya bully.

Too many secrets. Like Jenny smokes.

 

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The Last Dragon (1985) – Show Notes (Nerdtacular 2017)

INTRO

 

Oh hi! This is Brian Dunaway all the way  from the other side of the Country.

I hope everyone is have a great time at Nerdtacular 2017, pause for applause. too much pause…  *listen and pointy fingers*

I miss you guys.

Scott, set me up…Scott…set me up.

Oh hi, Sho’ Nuff we done watched a chop stick of a movie this week and in honor of this hot chop suey Motown mess I sent one of my students down to China town to get some advice from Master Sum Dum Goy….He sent back fortune cookies. Let’s see what they say.

Fortune Number One:

You are deeply attached to your family and home. (Apparently)

Fortune Number Two:

You are capable, competent, creative, careful. Prove it. (Toss it up baby!)

Fortune Number Three:

Stop Searching forever. Happiness is just next to you. (picture of Scott Fletcher)

Fortune Number Four:

You are always welcome in a gathering. (picture of Nerdtacular 2017)

and finally…

Fortune Number Five:

You need only to understand that it is not necessary it understand but only enjoy. (i kid you not. i have no idea.)

Thanks guys…oh…what is this…I’m feeling….I’m feeling all glowy!

Love you guys. Have a safe Nerdtacular.

Brian D

LINKS

The Last Dragon (1985)

Directed by Michael Schultz. With Taimak, Vanity, Christopher Murney, Julius Carry. In New York City, a young man searches for the “master” to obtain the final level of martial arts mastery known as the glow. Along the way, he must fight a martial arts expert corrupted with power, and rescue a beautiful singer from an obsessed music promoter.

The Last Dragon – Wikipedia

The Last Dragon (sometimes listed as Berry Gordy’s The Last Dragon ) is a 1985 martial arts film produced by Rupert Hitzig for Berry Gordy and directed by Michael Schultz. The film was a critical disappointment but a financial success, and is now considered a cult classic.

 

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The Last Dragon (1985) – Like Superman 2 with Black Ninjas and Motown Music. BOW BEFORE SHO’NUFF

or

The Last Dragon (1985) – Like bad sushi. You’ll have your head stuck in a trash can faster than Richie can be a smartass.

SHOW NOTES

Let’s get right to the music and flexing.

Oh Motown. Why are we not using classic Motown music?

Is this Weird Al singing?

This is more crotch shots than I am comfortable with.

Let’s practice Martial Arts….and eat rice!! Chop chop.

Time to switch up to boxing

When your master tries to kill you while you are training. Take a hint.

Leroy is my karate name

The final level. You know without knowing.

Masters think stuff is funny.

Every Samuri needs a Master…or he is Ronin and nobody wants to be Ronin in New York.

How did you end up with Bruce Lee’s medallion? did you beat him up for this?

Meanwhile down at the docks…a black man in a giant hat struts his way to the subway and china town.

uhh…I am tryin watch a movie here. Jam box in the aisle.

Am I meanest? Sho Nuff Shogun

Shade shades.

The Shogun of Harlem is here to watch a movie…

This movie has more interruptions than a Friday night at my house.

BRUCE LEROY!! ahah BRUUUUUUUCE LEEEEROY

Skinny little lizards like you…

Balcony kick!

Off brand Nike karate shoes

Freezer full of pig.

This is like the Lex Luther of white people. What’s in that tub.

Coke is it!

I don’t like the portrayal of white folks in this movie. I LOVE IT!

The great white hopeless.

My video hot pick of the week is DeBarge

There is a DeBarge music video right in the middle of their movie.

You let the order A la carte!

Video Game King!

There is a lot of shiny shirts in this movie.

Who was the costume designer?

JJ the white guy.

Was Motown trying to reinvent itself?

Never say never at Heavens Elevator door. 7th Heaven  with my cloud crowd.

Eddie Arcadian does not like to be turned down.

The clown crowd thinks they have a chance with the star. Stalker bait.

Meanwhile, Leroy just happens by. EYE CONTACT…lots of it.

If you are going to fight like Bruce Lee you have to make faces like Bruce Lee

If these bad guys had cell phones they could have back up in no time. Also, none of these bad guys had guns. Just a switchblade.

Bruce Jerry Curl Leroy

Such magical music after the fight…and now he is gone. TAXI!

Dangit Leroy…you lost your fancy medallion

Angela is a hot 80s mess that looks like a pig pissed in her eye. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!

Yep…Leroy…you just had to be a bad ass didn’t ya.

Yeah…big black guys with chains and clubs.

Johnny the no Martial Arts Asian

Leroy is wearing that Bruce Lee thing

Limp Wimp Leroy.

Kiss my converse

The initial bullying from the bullies.

Rudy!

Black man with a pizza shop. Just direct ya feet to Danny’s pizza.

Why is Leroy talking like a weirdo. He grew up in that house…he didn’t come over on a boat from the orient. Kind of sounds like a robot.

Little Richie is a playa.

Leeroy can not rap.

That lady is always in trouble and Leroy is always there.

I’ve heard worser Mr. Arcadia

Good thing Leroy packed his Ninja outfit.

Also, Leeroy can chase down cars

jive Coolies? Cool Breeze. Leroy can’t get any slack… Everybody hates Leroy

Leeroy Green… Junior

Momma throwing dough at the Martial Arts gang.

This will not be the last time Momma Green is going to have to pull Richie out of the trash can.

Busting up the family shop. That is typical martial arts films.

Leroy doesn’t want to be a body guard.

Dental School dropout. She reminds me of the actress from Little Shop Of Horrors…

Sho Nuff got so much money he can turn down money.

Mr. Nuff.

Wait…he doesn’t have a paintbrush? Then he ain’t gonna be making much love.

Everybody owned a jam box in the 80s

Do we still have “Jack me up” music in movies? Usually, used in training montages. Used here during the Bruce Lee seduction scene.

“Chocolate covered yellow pebble.”

Of course! The Chinese connection. All life’s problems are solved by Bruce Lee plots.

Kung-Fu Head.

Is it really a disguise if you really are the pizza delivery guy?

Medium sized oriental

This should be offensive to Asians and African Americans. But it’s ok right…

Leroy’s battle is against his own stupidity.

THE MASTER IS A COMPUTER!

Sum Dung Goy.

Leroy…you are following Drunken Master.

What you wanna bet the golden glow is like after glow from sex.

That time when your master fucks with you. It is common place for the master.

The old “lock your buddy up or know him out to keep him from putting him in danger.”

Who is operating Arcadias camera on the big screen.

NO GUNS ROCK!

Golaith only has one move…but it’s hard to beat.

Who is that kid. I know that kid.

Richie is going to pop and lock his way out of those ropes.

Who brought the ghost of Mr T to the fight?

Hey Leroy!

The old “next time i will not miss.” Why miss! Just fricken do it moron!

Richie kicked the rock in the nuts so hard that he will never use that again.

Richie done caught a concussion.  We used to think that was funny.

Oh snap. Sho Nuff has the glow. You are so screwed.

This just went from Star Trek to Star Wars.

Sho Nuff…friend to Brisco County

Sho Nuff…just wants to know who’s the master.

He don’t want money…he don’t want fame…he just wants affirmation. Sho Nuff.

Sometimes he takes a drowning to discover who is the master.

Master’s always think shit is funny.

Sho Nuffs powers are on the fritz.

You are the Last Dragon!

Finally! Time to use the gun.

Catching a bullet in your teeth. Quick, to the mythbusters!

What will happen to all the arcades if you chain up Mr Arcadia

The police always show up just in time.

You are the last dragon you posses the power of the glow.