Welcome to hell Carrie, we’ve been expecting you. Hopefully, you took notice of all the graffiti signs we have been leaving around town for the last couple of weeks to prepare you. Now come on in and burn a while. haha…I’m kidding. This is hell…you burn forever.
Ok…so let’s see…here is your first “turd in hell” ration. Just go ahead and eat that one up and get a taste of what to expect…oh don’t worry…we call it a ration…but really there is just an endless supply of shit down here.
Up next is the sign up sheet for the Devil’s Dance…you may know it back on earth as “The Prom.” This year’s theme is “Bring your Mom to Prom.” and speak of the devil, there’s your mom now trying to save Tommy from eternal damnation. You’re too late Margret! Now get back in your Prayer Pantry and Pray to Scary Jesus until the Devil’s Dance.
Oh hell…I see Billy is over at the lake of fire smashing hogs with a sledge hammer. Well, Carrie we will just have to finish up your orientation later. Hey Billy! Stop it! Stop enjoying yourself! This is hell for Pete’s sake. At least act like your are miserable!
You can’t hide from me Billy I can see your stupid Silhouette!
Carrie (1976) – I can see your dirty pillows and really way too much more than I care for. De Palma was weak…De Palma was weak…say it.
- 1976! What…that’s pre-Star Wars!
- Eat Shit Carrie
- A little friendly game of Volleyball and then a wild sexy romp in the ladies locker room.
- Can’t get enough of naked ladies rubbing themselves??…how about some slow mo for that Body Washing.
- Plug it up…plug it up…plug it up…that’s shit only King would write.
- This Gym teacher is kind of aggressive.
- Carrie White…not no more.
- The principal is not comfortable with all this women stuff.
- We can call you a cab
- Dismissed from gym for a week!
- “Crazy Carrie… Crazy Carrie..” Bike crash.
- These are godless times…I’ll drink to that.
- Here lady…here is a book of the lord for your heathen daughter.
- The first sin was intercourse! The first sin was intercourse.
- Momma…why didn’t you tell me.
- Eve was weak…Eve was weak…say it!
- You didn’t tell me momma! The curse of blood.
- Here Carrie…get into the praying pantry.
- That praying pantry Jesus is a little too real for me.
- “Thank you momma for my prayer time with scary Jesus in the prayer pantry.”
- Carrie White says it’s beautiful.
- It is bad enough to write Eat Shit…it’s worse to draw it.
- Stretch Norma Stretch
- The coach is just making them girls all super strong…they gonna beat up Carrie
- and now…run in a herd. Shut up Chris.
- This is over…this isn’t over by a long shot.
- Carrie knows she has the mind powers
- Come on Travolta…Drinking and Driving!
- Is Travolta in the slow lane…
- She is always getting slapped…the coach…her boyfriend.
- James Garner in the Gun Something
- Don’t call Travolta a Dumb Shit…or you will get the slap down.
- The library can teach you hot to use your telekinesis…aka witch powers
- If you ask Carrie to the prom she will run away.
- Having a moment with the gym teacher in the courtyard.
- This was the original Mean Girls
- You can’t go to Prom without a date!! What!
- “We don’t care how we look…do we William Katt?” Well…hair toss…maybe.
- Look at all these pigs! It’s a good joke right…kill a pig and take it’s blood.
- Travolta is the nightmare pigs have. Hammer time…get’er done.
- “You’ve been invited to the prom? You mean the Devil’s Dance? Now get in the Prayer Pantry and pray to scary Jesus.”
- After the blood comes the boys.
- Tell that boy you ain’t going to prom or we are moving away from here.
- Psycho music
- The devil took your daddy out of here…kicking and screaming.
- How did those loser get all that pig blood in that gas can.
- Keep your tits on and I will let you pull the rope when the time comes.
- Does Freddy have mind powers? Is he going to be there to count the ballots for king and queen at 6…he will be there at 8.
- Bates high school. Like Norman Bates?
- Uh…Ma’am are you going to buy those lipsticks?
- $10 bucks to rent a tux?
- I don’t have a Tuxedo body.
- It’s Pink Momma…are you colorblind or something?
- I can see your dirty pillows….breasts..they are called breasts.
- He’s going to laugh at you…they are all going to laugh at you.
- Look what you did mamma…you messed up my dirty pillows!
- Well the prom is going well. I love the prom band.
- What is Mrs Collin’s deal with Carrie…she is really focused in.
- Tommy is a pretty good pretender.
- This movie does a good job at lulling your into a false sense of trust…even though you know something bad is going to happen.
- You liked my poem!
- Love in the stars (prom theme)…feeling like I’m on Mars.
- To the Devil with false modesty…to the Devil. Momma was right!!
- Time to chop vegetables. They are all going to laugh at you. Chop Chop Chop
- Norma is always wearing that hat…even at prom.
- Drop them ballots and just start kicking.
- Travolta under the prom stage is enough to give you nightmares.
- That bucket is supposed to be full of glitter and star dust not pig blood.
- Sissy Spacek was 25 or 26 here.
- That blood bucket is all giggly.
- Follow the rope to the silhouette hands under the stage.
- William Katt is like…My girlfriend so crazy…got me taking other chics to the prom…now she is getting thrown out of the prom.
- They’re all gonna laugh at you…Mom had powers of future sight. Trust me Carrie…you can Trust me. Sorry…
- You know what this prom needs…water and electricity and a lot of fire.
- Now we gotta move.
- Mom is at home having candle light church.
- Now your dress is red. I guess your mom saw that as well. Foreshadow…they are all going to laugh at you.
- Momma is creepy hiding behind the door like that.
- I should have killed myself the first time he put it in me. The sin never dies.
- Whiskey Sex and I liked it
- The Devil has come home…you are the devil in this scenario Carrie
- Gonna stab you in the back with my floor knife.
- and now I am the scary the Jesus.
- Head to the Prayer Pantry with Scary Jesus as the house falls down.
- For Sale…one pile of rubble…
- Jump Scare!