Film Sack

Suburban Commando (1991) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Welcome to our little suburban crime ridden... and social justice warrior nightmare...of a neighborhood where you will find puppies in hot cars, unfair vending machines that steal your money, irresponsible car owners, delinquent kids and crazy shop owners who are easily spooked and are quick to broom waving and shouting nonsense. Hell, even our street performers are endangered. Yep it's Hard Times for our Late Night Mimes....can someone please think of the mimes! Yep, if I have learned anything from this movie...and I haven't...it's that sometimes you have to lose to win. Well I lost...where is my win? WHERE IS MY WIN SCOTT! WHERE! https://youtu.be/DevDlIU_JTI (more…)

By Brian Dunaway, ago
Film Sack

Queen of the Damned (2002) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Look, I'm just going to vamp out loud for a minute...vamp out loud...vamp'ing... alright, let's see If I can understand this film..warning. I'm gonna use some air quotes. "Eternal Vampire Teen;" LeStat is awakened from his "Sad Nap" when the suburban kids next door start a nu-metal band to piss off their parents. LeStat "tries out" for the band and lands "lead vocals." Ow. Finger cramps. LeStat finds some success as a rocker and "Taylor Swifts" (ow) his Vampire Family. (Now that's a shaming!) Meanwhile, "Grown ass" teenager, Jesse rebels against her strict orthodox parents by pursuing Bad Boy LeStat after she reads LeStat's personal diary outlining his failures in love including a cringe worthy moment with his Egyptian Grandma and his subsequent loneliness. Jesse is all like... "I'm lonely too! You get me LeStat! Let's run away together and live happily ever after!" At this point I took my own "Sad Nap" and when I woke up Great Great Grandma Vampire was turning to dust which is what happens when you sleep with your Grandkids. So I thought the movie was over...but apparently, LeStat still had to confront his girlfriend's father figure to confess he gave Jesse VD. "Vampire Disease." But even that wasn't the end because Lestat still wanted to make up for his misdeeds by delivering Jesse's dad a Vampire "Life Partner"... who David had apparently been stalking through "Instagram" like painting which weren't even a thing in 2002 so this whole theory is kind of falling apart at this point. Randy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_bIQzFH8II (more…)

By Brian Dunaway, ago
Film Sack

8 Mile (2002) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, ummm hi, yes...My name is Brian but my friends call me the Reluctant Rhyme Slayer. Well, they never called me that before tonight...but  on the drive over I heard it a lot. I guess I should have probably known something was up. Hey, thanks for signing me up for this guys and oh...by the way...nothing like Karaoke. alright...so..I guess...umm...can I get a beat? Thanks. Ah yeah...that's dope. Yo....MTV Raps Oh before I start I would just like to thank my opponent here for going first and  for his many honest words. While they were very hurtful.... I feel like I have a great opportunity to take those observations and make some real changes in my life. First thing Monday I'm going on a diet and getting some clothes that fit. Also, can I just say you really took that "spitting rhymes" thing to  heart. I mean I've never been that close to an actual rap and I was not aware how much saliva was involved. Look at me...I'm dripping over here. Alright, so let's get this over with...what's that? Times up? Oh Thank God. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCeuB9SS1HM (more…)

By Brian Dunaway, ago
Film Sack

Point Break (1991) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Hey! Young, Dumb and Full of Gum, who told you that you could park on my shooting range...where's my whistle! Oh...well hello there...you must be Kathryn Bigelow's wet dream....I mean...I'm just saying it's raining out here and you are fulfilling her artist dreams.. Anywho, it's your turn to take aim at hilariously illustrated bad guys & gals here at the "Sunday Funnies Shooting Range" where it's funny to shoot  stuff in  the head... or foot. Because everybody knows... foot trauma is the best form of humorous karma. Ok, Sammy Idaho or Billy Arkansas or whatever your deal is...If at any point you are "looking California and feeling Minnesota" then just stop. Because at that point "break"...I have probably foreshadowed too far into the future. C'mon...these are the 90s jokes Brah! Smile already, oh wow...4 out of 5 Dentists agree...that's creepy...Ok...smiling...it ain't your thing. Now where's my whistle! 100% sure you are going to take your shirt off in about 5 minutes if I don't get out of here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcHGwK8AnpY (more…)

By Brian Dunaway, ago
Film Sack

Gremlins (1984) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi, Ok Ok. Kate is 9 now and she is losing her faith in Santa Clause and as her dad and I have to fix that. So I've climbed up here on the roof of our house on Christmas Eve and I am going to shimmy.....down the chimmy...hehe...chimmy...AND deliver these age appropriate Christmas gifts for my darling Kate. Who hates Thanksgiving. Weirdo Ok ok, Straighten up Santa...time to take inventory. Let's see, Weird pet from ChinaTown. Check. Santa Clause Suit 2 sizes too big from ChristmasTown aka JC Penny. Check. Belly full of Egg Nog  from Dorry's Tavern. Check. Check Checkity Check. Ok, Ho ho ho, Here we go. *Grunting and squeezing...a little too fat. Oh, Hey little fellow what are you doing out of your box. Eww and why are you all slimy and gross. Move you stupid thing you are gonna make me fall and break my neck. Oh no no no The end. Merry Christmas Kate! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRyMrLinJ1o   (more…)

By Brian Dunaway, ago