8 Mile (2002) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi,

ummm hi, yes…My name is Brian but my friends call me the Reluctant Rhyme Slayer. Well, they never called me that before tonight…but  on the drive over I heard it a lot. I guess I should have probably known something was up. Hey, thanks for signing me up for this guys and oh…by the way…nothing like Karaoke.

alright…so..I guess…umm…can I get a beat? Thanks. Ah yeah…that’s dope. Yo….MTV Raps

Oh before I start I would just like to thank my opponent here for going first and  for his many honest words. While they were very hurtful…. I feel like I have a great opportunity to take those observations and make some real changes in my life. First thing Monday I’m going on a diet and getting some clothes that fit.

Also, can I just say you really took that “spitting rhymes” thing to  heart. I mean I’ve never been that close to an actual rap and I was not aware how much saliva was involved. Look at me…I’m dripping over here.

Alright, so let’s get this over with…what’s that? Times up? Oh Thank God.

Continue reading “8 Mile (2002) – Filmsack Show Notes”

Point Break (1991) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi,

Hey! Young, Dumb and Full of Gum, who told you that you could park on my shooting range…where’s my whistle!

Oh…well hello there…you must be Kathryn Bigelow’s wet dream….I mean…I’m just saying it’s raining out here and you are fulfilling her artist dreams..

Anywho, it’s your turn to take aim at hilariously illustrated bad guys & gals here at the “Sunday Funnies Shooting Range” where it’s funny to shoot  stuff in  the head… or foot. Because everybody knows… foot trauma is the best form of humorous karma.

Ok, Sammy Idaho or Billy Arkansas or whatever your deal is…If at any point you are “looking California and feeling Minnesota” then just stop. Because at that point “break”…I have probably foreshadowed too far into the future.

C’mon…these are the 90s jokes Brah! Smile already, oh wow…4 out of 5 Dentists agree…that’s creepy…Ok…smiling…it ain’t your thing.

Now where’s my whistle! 100% sure you are going to take your shirt off in about 5 minutes if I don’t get out of here.

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Gremlins (1984) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi,

Ok Ok. Kate is 9 now and she is losing her faith in Santa Clause and as her dad and I have to fix that.

So I’ve climbed up here on the roof of our house on Christmas Eve and I am going to shimmy…..down the chimmy…hehe…chimmy…AND deliver these age appropriate Christmas gifts for my darling Kate. Who hates Thanksgiving. Weirdo

Ok ok, Straighten up Santa…time to take inventory.

Let’s see, Weird pet from ChinaTown. Check.

Santa Clause Suit 2 sizes too big from ChristmasTown aka JC Penny. Check.

Belly full of Egg Nog  from Dorry’s Tavern. Check. Check Checkity Check.

Ok, Ho ho ho, Here we go.

*Grunting and squeezing…a little too fat.

Oh, Hey little fellow what are you doing out of your box. Eww and why are you all slimy and gross.

Move you stupid thing you are gonna make me fall and break my neck. Oh no no no

The end. Merry Christmas Kate!

 

Continue reading “Gremlins (1984) – Filmsack Show Notes”

Star Fox 2 – Game Review Notes

INTRO

LINKS

Star Fox 2 – Wikipedia

Although Star Fox 2 was complete, Nintendo cancelled the 1996 release due to the impending launch of the Nintendo 64, the desire to use the most advanced system available for a new Star Fox game, and competition changing expectations of 3D games. Though it was unreleased, various prototype ROM images have leaked online.

NOTES

Recently I received my SNES Classic!

Totally stoked to play the never released Star Fox 2

Oh Look at this shit. I have to complete Stage 1 of Starfox 1 to unlock Star Fox 2. There better be a damn good reason.

Memories of StarFox 1. It was all at once…amazing and hard to look at. All those polygons! I preferred the wireframe of look of Star Wars Arcade Game (1983) Plus it didn’t have all this gibberish…you had a real language.

But I have to admit. I really dug the music and sound effects…and ok…if I had to admit. I would say I love giant girder carrying robots.

and my wingmen were pretty fun to watch…Ribbit. I’ve been hit!!

and right in the middle of all the nerble nerble talk was an “incoming enemy”

But man, the anti alias was so bad.

Gawd I hate the first boss on the planet. It makes you realize just how hard it is to tell where your pew pews are going and god forbid you wanted to count how many times you actually hit the target before the shape ship started losing shapes.

Damn photon torpedoes.

Do a barrel roll!

The fail music kills your soul.

Slippy, Falco or Peppy?

Got so caught up in StarFox 1 I didn’t quit until after I was destroyed on Stage 2.

FINALLY! Now I get to play StarFox 2

Loot Box style! Open my Star Farx gift nintenderp!

Polygon Space Dragon!!

We got new characters! A puppy! and a lady fox!

Oh…what’s this! Instead of mission lines I have some kind of map..a real time map?

Ohh…an overall gameplan!   Real time dangers I have to attack on based on proximity and threat…oh geez. This is going to take strategy! But I’m only a space fox!

Andross is back. The Fiend!

We got a couple of planets they are taking.

Got to keep the baddies off Cornelies!

Miyu (fox? lynx)  and Fay (white dog )

Dual barrel ship. We each get our own tube!

Oh shit. I lost Star Fox right away.

Great…now I can quit back or keep on playing as Peppy the Frog. (My WingMan)

Dem rockets is fast

Why did I choose HARD!

Dem rockets is phallical shaped

Oh…my favorite is attacking the battleships!

While I am doing that. The Satellite is overrun. So it’s a never ending process of recapturing shit.

Time to destroy this battleship from the inside…like a proper ship does.

Oh look. I turn into a mech! Side Walk. Side Walk. Side Walk.

That actually wasn’t that hard.

Either I got better as Peppy or playing as a Wingman is easier.

Gah! 25% damage to the planet!

This is kind of hard. Kind of not so hard.

I like it. I have already forgotten all about StarFox 1.

Too bad the N64 came along and destroyed the chances for this game.

So time doesn’t stop when you enter a match but it does slow down for the greater game…on the map.

General Pepper is even spicier in the sequel. I don’t know if that is really true…but it’s a great byline.

dang Star Wolf mercenary team..Traitors!

It’s Peppy Hare.

Legacy[edit]
According to Cuthbert, some programming elements made for the game, such as the camera programs, were reused for the development of Super Mario 64.[23] Miyamoto estimated that 30% of Star Fox 64 came from Star Fox 2, citing ideas such as the all-range mode, multiplayer mode, and Star Wolf scenarios.[24] Several concepts were reused in Star Fox Command, including the map screen and multiple playable characters with their own fighters and statistics.[16] Some of its other gameplay mechanics, such as the walker mode for the Arwings, are used in Star Fox Zero (2016).

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Village (2004) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi fellow Village Sackers,

What manner of spectacle has attracted your attention so splendidly? I ought to carry it in my pocket to help me sack… and to do other pocket things.

Who came upon this? Randy, did you inappropriately fondle this Shyamalan?

Who has done this heinous act? Scott, Ibbott?

The Movie We Do Not Speak Of, has not breached our borders in many years (for some…never). We do NOT go into IT’S plot holes and  IT does NOT come to our homes and give us face spankings.. like that one scene with Adrian Brody…that is a face thirsty for a slaps.

It is a truce.  Yet, here we are…sacks in hand.

We are grateful for the time we have been given.

 

LINKS

The Village (2004)

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan. With Sigourney Weaver, William Hurt, Joaquin Phoenix, Bryce Dallas Howard. A series of events tests the beliefs of a small isolated countryside village.

The Village (2004 film) – Wikipedia

The Village is a 2004 American psychological horror film, written, produced, and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, and starring Joaquin Phoenix, Adrien Brody, Bryce Dallas Howard, William Hurt, Sigourney Weaver, and Brendan Gleeson. The film is about a village whose inhabitants live in fear of creatures inhabiting the woods beyond it referred to as “Those We Don’t Speak Of.”

 

 

TWITTER

The Village (2004) -Like Sigourney Weaver knitting a sweater for a Xenomorph. Now that is a twist… & a hook & a twist. OH, LOOK I MADE A SWEATER.

SHOW NOTES

Someone playing the Lute! Lute! Lute!

Big drum…big drum scare me.

Perhaps by the music we are implying an Indian contingent? Gonna eat them villagers! Nom nom…chop ’em up

So many great actors.

Push all credits. Pull Director credit

That sky is so fake!

Derbys! Dirty Derbys! oh…sorry…dead dead dead.

Nah…we just gonna sit back here on the other side of this fence while you “pine” away for your loved one.

1890-1897 … 7 ish

Outdoor long table. Man the flys…where are the flys!?

He likes the howling. It makes him clap happy.

We were eating veggies…but all of our bowls are full of oats when we wash them.

I will give M. Night this…he knows how to capture believable life in a camera.

Bury the red flowers…get serious with the sweeping now!

Trees are so noisy at night…creek creek..chirp chirp

“What manner of spectacle has attracted your attention so splendidly? I ought to carry it in my pocket to help me teach.” That was a lot just to say “what you kids looking at?”

Found the flies!

mmm…skinned bunny.

“Those We Don’t Speak Of killed it.” SHHHH…we don’t speak of them!

Meat Eaters…Large Claws.

We got a truce.

Ripley is knitting!

Why am I always knitting? Cause I have been working on this one bootie for 2 weeks.

Hello…I’m here to read a letter. I wrote it. Also, it has an end. Here is it…The End

Finton Coin! I am Finton!

My name is Lucius I sleep on a dirt floor.

Who killed the puppy!

I always forget what a fortnight is. Forkknife.

Our boundary has not been breached. We would know…I’m talking about sex.

hey…papa! can I marry a boy? it’s Lucius.

haha! I love you Lucius. I love you more than the sun and moon together!

HAHA! crushed!

Life is long and love is deep…damn…now I want to cry.

Where do they get their top 40 Village songs?

Hey Lucius…I’m a lush and you don’t talk…just like my dead son.

oh..she blind!

Let’s play a game of “grab the stick and get whacked!.”

A blind girl and a boy who likes to hit with sticks run to the hills to meet the quite one.

Red is bad. Yellow is good.

Some people have a haze…purple haze?

“You run like a boy…in case you can’t see it….oh wait.”

Ivy got a crush on Lucius!

Look…Lucius don’t think stuff is funny.

Berry…the bad color!

Meanwhile, Down at the Resting Rock.

Mom just laid down the nasty truth about Daddy and Town.

This place is full of secrets ma!

Somebody likes Mom…he never touches you…would that make Ivy my sister? can we still make babies? This is a small village with not many options. That is why I really want to go to town.

I got on my village poncho! Time to face those who we do not speak of.

Oh hi…I’m just blind and playing a night game outside…cause it is always night for me.

Noah needs medicine that will help him hold still.

Kitty is giddy for love!

She wants to marry the shirt guy…maybe you could pick him up some more shirts while you are in town…if you don’t die.

Oh snap! That ain’t Lucius…Thanks for the Jump Scare Mr. Night.

Noah has one of them “slap me faces”

Uh…that is scary. Night is always great at showing you just enough to scare the pants out of you visually.

She is serious about waiting for Lucius.

Damn I just got chills when he grabbed her hand to save her….and the music swells.

Gee…a note…I wonder who wrote a note…could it be Lucius the village note writer? yep.

So much shame!! shame…shame… I knew that kid was no good.

Could someone please come get Noah…thank you!

Well that was fun…now let’s go outside and eat at the big tables….”we are grateful…for the time we have been given.”

Sounds like Town is a real shit show.

This place wants to burn.

That is a lot of dead animals…on your wedding night!!

WHO TOOK MY HIDES AND FEATHERS!

The marks are high….Coyotes can not reach that high…duh.

Why you on this porch?!

The boys played The Stump….this village needs some new games!

Tell me my color blind witch!!

One of the most beautiful romantic scenes in any movie. Man M. Night is the man.

Aww…that went well…Sisters are cool with each other…doubtful.

Let’s see how the boys fair. Nope…not so good.

That was super effective…totally freaky…so quiet…no screaming. Is that more realistic?

Noah has been bad.

Oh wow…did you know we are full of the bad color?

An accident? Yeah…Lucius fell on a knife…like 20 times.

Mr. Walker!!! Mr. Walker!!

Thoughts and prayers.

Uh oh…Noah gets a face spanking.

What are we talking about here…going to the towns?

a dollar into 5 in a fortnight…

What is in the shed! Why would she scream?!

Ivy and her merry band of two. All in Yellow. Kiss a fellow.

I got a bag of rocks pa!

Christop is like…nah! Why ain’t I never heard of no safe rocks! and why am I wearing this yellow…I don’t even like yellow!

an hour in…and the truth will set you free!!

Have fun Ivy. I’m gone.

The ceremony of meat! Not the ceremony of meet!

Damn you elders!

They are making some good points…but I’m mad as hell at them for lying to me.

and now I’m in a hole. Thanks a lot ya pansy boys.

Love will find a way! or die trying! sometimes that way is throwing rocks.

Man. these are the shittiest elders ever. Lie to their kids their entire lives…then send a blind girl out to head to the village.

So we are still going on the idea that there could be evil in the woods…because…once there was evil.

If that thing suddenly runs at us…EEEEK

Why doesn’t anyone ever dress up as the bad creature in this movie?

These elders are the worst elders ever.

Oh I know…let’s hide the extra monster costumes under the floorboards. by the way…that is some high quality monster garb for the 1800s

Noah got what Noah got

Lucius is thinking “I feel very stabbed right now.”

Screw this safe color crap!

We have a lot of secrets here in The Village.

Time to recap…in case you missed it. Here is all the shit we said that you missed.

Please return to your vehicle? Do you see a vehicle?

I am from “The Woods.”

Oh hey…listen to tall this depressing news…cause now you want to live in The Village

Hey…it’s the director.

mmm…my fridge is full of medial use and rotten bananas!

Hey Jay…where is the maintenance ladder?

She’s crying cause she knows her son is a wussy and got beat by a blind girl.

Hey I know! We have told a bunch of lies that ended poorly…let’s tell some more lies! This is working out great!

Lucius probably died.

 

 

Dreamcatcher (2003) – Filmsack Show Notes

INTRO

Oh hi,

Greetings human, I am Dudley Duddits of the  Space Mounties and I am in pursuit of Donnie Duddits. He’s….uh…how do you humans say…special?

Apparently, he has emotionally attached himself to a cartoon dog with a speech impediment and hopes to endear himself to you humans by taking on these properties. Wow, this is more complicated than necessary.

Anywho, have you encountered such a being?

Also, did you know, it’s butt weasel season? Be sure to cover your orifices human.

Coincidently, we have been monitoring your people…and I have a friendly bet going with the crew.

if it is bestiality when a human attempts to mate with an animal…gross by the way…is it then called me-stiality when one attempts to please oneself? The Galaxy wants to know.

Geez, how much Oxy and Day time TV was King watching when he wrote this. Kiss my bender.

LINKS

Dreamcatcher (2003)

Directed by Lawrence Kasdan. With Morgan Freeman, Thomas Jane, Jason Lee, Damian Lewis. Friends on a camping trip discover that the town they’re vacationing in is being plagued in an unusual fashion by parasitic aliens from outer space.

Dreamcatcher (2003 film) – Wikipedia

Dreamcatcher is a 2003 American science fiction horror film based on Stephen King’s novel of the same name. Directed by Lawrence Kasdan and co-written by Kasdan and screenwriter William Goldman, the film stars Damian Lewis, Thomas Jane, Jason Lee and Timothy Olyphant as four friends who encounter an invasion of parasitic aliens.

 

TWITTER

Dreamcatcher (2003) – Like expressing something in 280 characters when 140 is sufficient. Still room for a Butt Weasels.

SHOW NOTES

This sure is a lot of opening credits

This was 5 minutes after X-Files movie?

It’s a dream-catcher and SSDD

EARLY GRAVE! I prefer being late.

King never shy’s away from Fat as Fear…

Memory Warehouse

Time to off yourself. Psycho Psychiatrist. Jonesy?

Great you just shot the guy next door.

So far…office jobs.

Is everybody Psychic?

another desk job.

Best fried clams in the state…that is a weird first date.

The key trick does not get you dates.

Half past 6…she ain’t gonna be there.

Jason Lee is the only one without a job. Unless you count drunk with a toothpick.

SSDD

Beaver has nothing. Jonesy has wife and kids.

Save ON MEATS!

As soon as we figured out a way to show people getting hit by cars on film. We used the hell out of it.

Otch Out Fo Miestr Gay

Bite My Bag.

Wait…Beaver got a blow job from a lady after Bingo?

Derry? Like in IT and other Stephen King small town stories?

In the movies. Kiss when you wake up?

Promiseland….reference.

 

Mental Warehouse.

Keep Duddits on the 3rd level

20 years out to Hole in the wall.

Duddits is our dreamcatcher.

Remember when….

Scooby Doo lunch box!

You want to eat half of this dog turd? I mean that is like 5 way turd

Pete can fly.

What kind of bully standoff is this. Happens all the time in Stephen King world.

Blue Buyousuusi

Oooby oooby dooo…

I duddits!

No Bounce, No Play…sometimes I think Stephen King writes down everything he thinks.

Jonesy’s brain warehouse is the warehouse where they meet duddits

Snow in the eye!! glasses..phew.

That’s no deer! That’s a maaan! A stumble man.

Jonesy got ran over by a car and 6 months later only has a limp.

Indian Charm…catches nightmares.

They keep the Dreamcatcher in the hole int he wall.

Is it on the wagon or off the wagon.

Henry forced the guy to eat himself to death. Is that ever listed as cause of death?

Toothpicks are gross.

Mother used to feed me pea soup…

Have you been eating wood chuck turds?

There are fart jokes….there are lots of gross fart jokes.

If you need to urk. also, don’t take a shit in the linen closet.

The kids do not look much like the adults.

Know what is a bad idea…getting a run at a hill in the snow.

I’ve never flipped a car. Unsure if I would be laughing about it.

Peanut Butter calms me down. How do you eat peanut butter…spoon? butter knife? finger?

Great jump scare…saw it from a mile away…but still. Miss Roadkill got me.

Trying to keep a toothpick in your mouth while yelling at a helicopter.

Why is God (Morgan Freeman.) watching me with his huge prosthetic eye worms?

Is this SSDD? In other words is this just weird shit or has the day finally come?

haha…Scooby Dooby Doo we got some work to do now.

What the hell does No Bounce, No Play mean.

Turd is a clinker.

Did you guys used to soak toothpicks in cinnamon?

Humor and Horror go hand in hand.

Blue Bayou comfort song.

Blue vs Gray?

That is one strong worm creature.

Oh man…that door handle coming off in your hand…that is the worst!

Beaver made a sacrifice. Was his power premonitions? bad feelings? I got a bad feeling about this Jonesy

That is one big alien. He’s translucent…and slimy.

Oh…his head popped into a red mist…gross.

Time to mobilize the military.

Is it my imagination or are Morgan Freeman’s eyebrows even bigger in this movie.

Named after that broad in Aliens.

Grey Boy look…

The Shit Weasels!

Blue Boy…Bucko

The alien only infects some.

We are not regular army…thank goodness Maple came in to explain it back to us.

Oh…do not Scout’s honor when the general has a loaded gun.

So much blood in this movie.

25 years he has been fighting aliens.

In Fast and hard , out clean and smiling.

She ain’t napping for farts!

The scene everybody loves…the Jonesy snap to smile.

The truck that handles like a luxury car.

Know things. Talk to one another. Duddits gave them the gift.

Writing your name in the snow….dick chomp!

Fire to the crotch is the only way to stop those things.

Mighty Mouse is on the way!

Beaver had nothing in his head.

 

Pete knows Mr. Gray is a bond Villian.

whisper messages while talking. Repeat emphasis?

The red stuff looks like rust for organics.

He used Beaves catchphrase.

Did he not notice the dead man in the tub?

Oh. They lay eggs…really gross eggs.

Liquid Fire!!

oh no…they already hatched!

King uses leaches and wormy things a lot.

What is up with these guys and dropping sticks.

Can you light a match with your finger? Strike anywhere matches.

ohh…they use a maneuver called dreamcatcher with duddits in the middle.

Love this music they use when trying to locate the missing girl. It reminds me of 90s Goosebumps music.

Kids love hanging around trains! In King stories anyways.

Alien space crash.

I’m that dog. I’m that monster.

Aww…the greys are so swee….oh fuck! What are those things! Wormy shits…kill ’em all.

That ship has a self destruct and boy..

Bite my bag.

Wait…has he infested Jonesys body or is he mimicking it? Cause he just morphed into an alien.

Where is Jonesy? Is he in the head?

Grote…don’t eat the meat!

He’s got 4 boxes of Duddits…I could eat 4 boxes of Duddits at the movies. mmm…Milk Duddits.

That is a lot of hazmat suits.

Do we still say “Getting too old for this shit?”

The study shows squats.

A hitchhiker is our greatest fear.

Blue Boys, Blue Zone, Blue Camp. Blue Blue.

Shop at Walmart and never misses an episode of Friends

hehe…in true military fashion. He calls Eddie Dr. Boston…cause that is where he is from.

Over the Curtis line!

Time for some Star Wars wipes….lots of them.

call 1-800-Henry…that ain’t even numbers.

How much crack am I smoking right now? The gun is a phone. MY GUN IS A PHONE..EVERYTHING IS A PHONE.

Nice sweater jacket. Lukemia! No…not Duddits! Not the duds! Also, those Scooby Doo lunchboxes are indestructible.

Victory pose mom!

Uh oh…that gun has a tracker in it.

Keeping an Asian in your Truck closet.

What happened in Montana? Several mentions. Shit must have went bad. Tell us that story!

Wipe!

He ate the trooper!

Poor old Donnie. He looks sick!

Mr Gay is Mr. Gray. Mr. Gray wants war…or water. Duds

One worm…One worm to kill the world.

Would the military let a helicopter just fly away without pursuit?

WIPE

Go faster! Oops…car and snow no go. No Snow. No Go.

That may be overkill to kill somebody with a helicopter.

Mutual Kill.

Morgan Freeman wore fake eyebrows! What!

Shoot him! Shoot him!

How heavy are manhole covers?

I can understand that big eel weasel getting int he water and causing problems. But that little jiggly worm would prolly get eet.

So the alien was inside…but is a mist? that can become solid? or did it come out of his butthole? or did the mist come from his butthole?

I want to dress as Duds for Halloween.

Duds needs to blow his nose.

Duds is heavy man. Heavier than he looks.

You thought you got me…I got you!! I Duddits!

Do all aliens have scorpion tails?

ew ew ew…red stuff! red stuff!

squish.

But to black!

Meanwhile back at the hole in the wall.

Fuck Me Freddy

Kiss My Bender

Bite My Bag

Fuckaree/row/roo

Jesus Christ-Bananas

Doodlyfuck